


A Second Chance

by roarlikeakitten



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-15
Updated: 2020-02-14
Packaged: 2020-12-16 16:29:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 49,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21039254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roarlikeakitten/pseuds/roarlikeakitten
Summary: Kristie Mewis left her home town three days after telling her family she was leaving Chicago to go play for the Houston Dash. Her family and best friend were not thrilled with her decision but Kristie had made her decision.Rachel Daly loves playing for the Dash. She loves her friends, Houston and playing for the EWNT. She does not like Kristie Mewis, and more importantly she does not like when Kristie Mewis suddenly moves into her life.Kristie has a rough history with relationships, but can Rachel break down her walls or will she be stuck outside?*Trigger Warning*





	1. A New Beginning

"Ladies and gentlemen welcome to Houston, Texas. Thank you for flying Southwest."

Kristie Mewis turns on her phone, immediately met with messages and notifications. She opens up her family group chat with her Mom, Dad, and little sister Sam.

_Made it to Houston. _

She lets every single person on the plane off before she grabs her backpack and carry on from the overhead bin and walks off the plane. Slowly making her way to baggage claim, she looks around, taking in the Texas signs, flags and memorabilia. She chuckles and tries to find her bag.

She didn't pack much, just the essentials and things she treasured most.

"Kristie! Over here!"

She looks up to see her good friend Kealia Ohai holding a sign saying "Welcome Home Kmew!" with a drawing of a soccer ball on it. The nerves she didn't know she had immediately went away as she smiled.

Kealia and Kristie had known each other for a few years after playing together on the United States Women's National Team. They were close, not as close as Kristie and her best friend Stephanie McCaffrey, but still pretty close.

Kealia is bouncing on her toes until Kristie gets to her and throws her arms around Kristie. Kristie, not one for physical affection, rolls her eyes but hugs her friend back.

"Okay Kea, you can let go now." Kristie tries to detach herself from her blonde, energetic friend but the small girl has a strong grip.

When Kealia finally lets go, she sees Kristie scrunch in discomfort but doesn't think anything of it due to the four hour plane ride. Still holding Kristie's arms she says, "I just can't believe you're here!"

"Yeah, well you better believe it," Kristie replies.

Kea ignores her friend's sarcasm and grabs the handle of her suitcase, "C'mon, Justin is waiting outside."

They walk outside together and Kristie is immediately hit with humidity and hot air. "Geez, is it always this humid?" she complains.

"Oh yeah, this is cool for March. Wait until summer, that when it really gets hot."

They walk over to a white Ford F-150 that looks brand new. The biggest guy Kristie has even seen gets out of the truck.

"Hey, I'm Justin, but everyone calls JJ, except for this one." He looks over at Kea as she rolls her eyes.

Kristie is sizing him up, making a first impression. "Here, let me get that for you," he grabs her suitcase and puts it in the back seat of the truck.

"I'm Kristie, nice to finally meet you." She has already made the decision that she approves of him for her friend. She can tell Kea is head over heels for this guy so he must be special.

Kristie opens the door, gets in the truck and Justin shuts the door. Her friend is just standing outside the truck, and Kristie is confused until Justin runs to the other side to open her door.

Kea gets in and Justin gives her a small kiss before walking to his side. "He doesn't like it when I open my own car door," she says blushing, looking at Kristie who has a confused face.

"Ah."

'Geez, this southern hospitality thing is a little weird' she thinks to herself.

Justin gets in and puts the truck in drive, reaching for his girlfriends hand. Kristie sees this and smiles to herself. She definitely approves.

As they drive to Justin's house that he shares with Kea, Kristie looks out the window and sees Houston's beautiful night life. Kea points out different places, "Whataburger! You'll definitely have to try it! There's our favorite Italian place, our grocery store," and other things Kristie knew she wouldn't remember.

They pull up to the house and Kristie is surprised at how big it is. She gets out of the car slowly as Justin gets out and grabs her suitcase. Kristie grabs her backpack and checks her phone. She ignores the messages flooding in.

After getting settled into one of their guest rooms, Kristie walks into the living room to find Kea standing by the couch looking at her phone. She looks up when she hears Kristie come in, "You know, you should probably answer your texts. I've got people asking me if you made it, when you're getting in, and some didn't even know you were moving." Kristie gets one of Kea's famous 'disapproving eyebrow raised' looks.

Kristie sits on the couch and sighs. "I only told the people that had to know about my move. So my family, you and Steph. My old team will find out about the trade tomorrow."

Kea sits down next to her. She sees her friend hurting but knows that if she pushes, Kristie will only pull back further.

Kristie nervously plays with her hands, not making eye contact with Kea. She feels Kea grab her hands to make her stop.

"I really appreciate you and Justin letting me stay here while I figure things out. You guys really didn't have to and I just want to thank you."

"Kristie, you know I love you and care about you so much. You're welcome to stay here for however long you need to."

Kristie pulls Kea in for a hug, Kea's eyes shoot open. In the many years she has know Kristen Mewis, she had never once initiated a hug. 

When Kristie pulls away, Kealia can see tears in her eyes.

"Kristie, did something happen? You know you can tell me anything."

Kristie takes a deep breath and settles into the couch, she knows it's going to be a long night.

She hadn't told anyone what happened, not even Steph or her sister Sam. She only told them that she needed to leave. Leave Chicago, leave her home, just leave.

Both girls were surprised, as they thought this decision had come out of nowhere. But Kristie had been thinking about it for a month by then. Her plans with the Houston Dash coach had been finalized, her Chicago Red Stars coach was aware obviously. A trade like this didn't just come out of nowhere.

She gave her family and best friend three days notice before she left. Three days for them to be surprised, then confused, angry, and then upset. She didn't even let them drop her off at the airport, she got an Uber.

Kealia was lucky. She got a week's notice, well Kristie asked a week before she would get on a plane whether or not she had a place to stay.

Fast forward and then they're here, on Kealia and Justin's couch.

"So you know how I was with Mark right?"

"Yeah, you guys have been dating for like over a year."

"Well, we broke up one week ago."

"Oh, Kristie I'm so sorry."

"It's alright."

Kristie pauses, picking up the pillow sitting next to her and putting it in her lap, she plays with it nervously.

Kea pauses before asking "What happened Kris?"


	2. Freedom

**Kristie's POV**

I knew I had to tell Kea. God, I had to tell someone, I'd been hiding it for months.

"Well, I got home early from an away game in January and was going to surprise Mark at his apartment. I'd had a key since we started dating basically so when I got there, I opened the door like I normally would have...."

I remember like it was yesterday, geez it'll probably be in my mind forever.

_I was trying to be as quiet as possible, I knew he had the day off and was probably sleeping so I set my stuff down and when I walked down the hall I heard him._

_And he wasn't alone. I couldn't see who it was but I heard her. And him. And I froze. I was mortified. I was embarrassed. I tried to get out as quickly and quietly as possible but I tripped and fell._

_He obviously heard me because he came stumbling out, pulling up his boxers._

_'Kristie, babe. Wh-what are you doing here? Home? I thought you were in...Portland?'_

_'I came home early to surprise you. But obviously I came home at the wrong time.'_

_I started to tear up but told myself to hold it together._

_'Uh, it's not what you think,' he tries to get out._

_'Then what is it Mark?' I say in a calm voice. I need to be calm. I couldn't let him see me break down._

_He tries to come up with an excuse but can't think of anything._

_'Let me explain.'_

_I see the girl he was with awkwardly walk out of his room. She can't look me in the eye, which is probably better for her or else I would've taken her down._

_'I'm just gonna go...'_

_I'm staring at Mark, daring him to look at her as she walks around me, trying to get to the door. She shuts it quietly and I let out a frustrated scream._

_He walks toward me, 'Baby please. I love you.'_

_'Love? You love me?' my voice is getting louder._

_He keeps walking closer, I keep backing up until I can't anymore. My back is against the wall and he is right in front of me._

_His hand comes up to my face, trying to run his fingers through my hair. I push his arm away, 'I can't even look at you right now Mark.'_

_'Kristie, let me explain.'_

_'No. I don't want to hear it.'_

_'Kristie.' His voice is getting louder but I'm not backing down._

_'NO MARK.'_

_And that's when it happens. He slaps me._

I flinch, but when I focus again, I see a pillow in my lap and my hands nervously pulling at the tassels. I hadn't realized I started crying but I feel a tear run down my cheek.

I look up, afraid of what I'm about to see in my friend's eyes. The only person I've shared this with. I'm afraid she's going to look at me with pity in her eyes, or be crying.

I hate it when I cry, let alone anyone else. I never know what to do.

Kea is looking at me, and of course she has tears in her eyes.

"Did you leave? Did you tell Sam, or Steph?"

I'm ashamed of my answer.

"No, uh I didn't leave that night."

She's quiet.

Her voice is calm, "So, if you broke up one week ago, but your away game, I remember watching that. That was in January right, around Justin's birthday?...and you broke up a week ago. It's March 30th, so one week ago would've been like the 22nd right?..."

She had been talking to herself, but when she gets it her eyes widen and she looks at me.

"You stayed with him," I nod, looking down.

"Okay...well...he didn't do it again, right? I mean, you would've left him if he did it a second time....right?"

I can't look at her. I can't see the disappointment in her eyes. Mine fill with tears. Tears I've been holding in since that night when I tried to surprise him. That night when it started.

"Oh,...Kristie." She reaches for me and I let her hold me and I cry. Cry tears I've tried so hard to keep inside for such a long time. She rubs my back and soothes me, "it's okay, I've got you, you're okay."

After I've cried all that I could she lets me go. I wipe the tears under my eyes. Kea wipes hers.

"Okay. Okay. We will figure this out. You're safe here, with me and Justin. Away from him."

"That's why I had to get away... One night, it was the worst it had ever been. I'm not going to tell you what he did because I can't, I just can't. But I told him if he did it again I'd go to the police. He didn't believe me but when I showed him the pictures I had of my bruises, he knew I really would. I told him that we were finally over and if he tried to contact me, my family, my friends, I'd drop the pictures off at the police station."

"I haven't left my house since then. I only went to practice but told coach I had gotten hurt off the pitch and couldn't play. I had a nasty bruise so she believed me."

"H-how did you hide them? The bruises?"

"I got really good with makeup."

Kea reaches for my hand.

"I was suffocating Kea," my voice cracked when I said her name and I tried not to cry again. "I had to leave.... No one knew what was going on so no one was expecting me to leave like that. My family, Sam and Steph are so mad at me. I couldn't tell them. I couldn't tell them I was weak."

A tear slips out of my eye and she brushes it away. "You are the farthest thing from weak Kristen Mewis."

I shrug my shoulders, not saying anything.

"So what do you want to do now? Report him? Get a restraining order?" she asks me.

"Right now Kea, I just want to go to bed. I'm so exhausted, mentally, physically, emotionally."

She nods her head. "Okay. Okay we can definitely do that."

We stand up and she hugs me, holding me tight.

"Kea,"

"Yeah?"

"You're hurting me."

"Oh, I'm sorry, I-I'm so sorry."

She lets go of me and holds my arms.

"It's okay, you didn't do it."

She looks heartbroken.

"Kris-"

"I think I'm just going to go to bed, I'm so tired."

"Yeah, yeah of course. Goodnight Kristie, I love you and I'm here for you, you know that right?"

"Yeah I know Kea, I love you too. Goodnight."

I shut the bedroom door behind me and walk slowly to the bed.

'I'm free, I'm finally free' was running through my head over and over again.

I fell on the bed and started crying, but this time, it was a relief.


	3. The Trade

"**Chicago Red Stars player Kristen Mewis has been traded to the Houston Dash. It's believed to been talked about between the coaches and herself for weeks now, finally happening."**

Rachel Daly is woken up by her best friend and roommate Jane Campbell jumping on her bed.

**Rachel's Point of View**

"What the hell....Jane."

"Rach get up, get up!"

"What is it?" I'm pissed she's waking me up at, I check my phone, 9:15 on an off day. She knows I usually sleep until 10 on these days.

"Did you hear?"

"Obviously I didn't hear since you just woke me up," I say annoyed.

"Kristen Mewis got traded to the Dash."

"What?" I ask, shooting straight up.

"I know right!"

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah!"

"I'm going to text Kea." I reach for my phone, deciding to text in our group chat so everyone can see, I'm sure we all have questions. I'm just the only one gutsy enough to ask our captain.

_Dash Girlzzz_🔥

_Rach: Is it true?_

_Sophie: Yea um guys what's goin on?_

_Ambs: Hell if I know_

_Jane: Did anyone know?_

_Nich: I heard about it today_

_Bi: I think we all did_

_Rach: uh Kea wth is going on?_

_Kea: Yes. Kristen Mewis was traded from Chicago._

_Al: what the hell?_

_Linds: ???_

_Rach: what the hell Kea?_

"Ugh! I can't believe this!"

"Why are you so upset about this?" Jane asks

"She's a horrible player! She's rough, she doesn't care about her teammates or her team, she purposely tries to hurt other players, and she's a bitch!"

"Woah, settle down there red rider. You don't even know her."

"I know enough about her to know I don't want to get to know her. And when we played against Chicago last season she tried to take me out. On purpose."

"I mean, she's kinda hot don't ya think" Jane smirks, pulling up the girl's instagram.

"No, she's not hot! How could you say that?"

"I mean, look at her Rach!" Jane tries to show me a picture of her but I push her phone away.

I get off my bed, frustrated. "I'm going to call Kea."

"Rach, what do you expect her to say? She doesn't call the shots."

"But she's our captain, she should have said something."

Jane shakes her head at me and goes back to looking at her phone.

I find her contact and call. I'm pacing around our kitchen, Jane has decided to join me. She sits at the bar, shaking her head. When she answers, I put it on speaker.

**"Hey Rach"**

**"Don't you 'hey Rach' me Kea. What the actual hell? How could you not tell us?"**

**"Woah, calm down there Daly."**

**"No, I'm pissed Kealia."**

**"Fine Rachel. What do you want to know?"**

**"Why her? Of all the people why her?"**

**"Because she's an amazing defender? Does there have to be any other reason?"**

**"She's not an amazing player, she's rough, she doesn't care about her teammates, she purposely tries to hurt opposing teams, and she's a bitch who doesn't have emotions."**

**"Rachel, stop."**

I hear her cover her phone and say "I'll be right back," she's probably talking to Justin. Jane just shakes her head at me, disapprovingly.

**"Don't you dare say that about her Rachel. Do you even know her? Have you even met her off the pitch? No, so you have no right to say that about her. I've known her for years Rachel, so I can tell you how wrong you are. Honestly, I was hoping you out of all people would be more open to this considering the fact that you moved here from England without knowing anyone either. That's how she's feeling right now. I can't believe you, Rach. You know what, I'll see you at practice." **She hangs up the phone before I can respond.

Jane whistles. "Dude, I've never heard her that angry before. You messed up."

I look down at my phone angrily and scream.

"Rach, chill out. Go to the gym or something geez."

"You know the other girls are mad too right? It's not just me."

"No, you're the one that's got it out for her, and you pissed off your captain." She walks into her room, shaking her head and closes her door.

•••

I decided to go to the gym in our apartment complex. All of the Dash players live together in the same building except for Kealia who lives with Justin.

When I'm on the treadmill, I look up videos of Kristen playing. I would never say it out loud, but she is a damn good player.

By the time I'm done, I'm covered in sweat and less angry, but still annoyed.

I decide to text Kea and apologize since we have practice tomorrow and I don't want her pissed at me.

_To Kea_

_I'm sorry I called her a bitch. I was just pissed._

_From Kea_

_Rachel what you said was out of line. And as a person the girls look up to on this team, your attitude needs to change tomorrow when she's at practice. She's having a hard time enough as it is._

_To Kea_

_If moving is so hard for her, then why did she do it? She didn't have to come to Houston._

Kea hasn't responded in over an hour so that means she's probably still mad at me. Well, the next practice will be fun.

**Kristie's POV**

The next morning I didn't want to talk about it with Kea, I didn't want to talk about it anymore. I'm tired of talking about it.

"So, uh-"

_"_Kea, can we just please not talk about this anymore? I really just want to take a break from it all. When I want to talk about it again, I promise you I will."

She looks at me guiltily. "Yeah okay, just know I'm here for you no matter what," she says as she grabs my hand.

"Thank you."

"So, what do you want to do today? We can layout by the pool, it might be too cold to get in but we can tan or use the hot tub?"

"That actually sounds really nice right now."

"Okay great! I'll go get my swimsuit on and meet you by the pool."

Thankfully I packed a swimsuit, I hadn't worn one since last summer since Chicago is pretty cold. I put it on and stop before I go outside.

'You're fat.'

'You need to lose weight.'

'You shouldn't show that much skin.'

I shake my head, trying to get rid of Mark's voice.

'It's Kea, Kristie. You can do this. She's not going to say those things. That was Mark, he's gone now.'

I try to leave the negative thoughts in my room and make my way outside.

I set my towel down on a chair, focused on my phone, "So what kind of music do you guys listen to.."

I stop when I see Kea looking at me with wide eyes.

"What? What is it?" I look around, afraid something is about to sting me.

"Kristie," her voice cracks at the end and her eyes fill with tears.

I look down and then it all clicks.

I have bruises. On my body. On my arms, stomach, and legs. I had forgotten about them, since I was too focused on the thoughts in my head.

I look up at her. She doesn't know whether or not she should come to me or stay where she is. She looks helpless.

"Kea..." I walk over to her and grab her hands, putting them on my face so she'll look me in the eyes.

"It's okay, I'm okay. I'm out now and he can't get me. I'm okay," I reassure her.

She wants to say something but doesn't have the words.

Finally, she says "I want to hurt him. I want to him go pay for what he did to you. He should be in jail Kristie!"

"Kea, please. I'm okay. He won't hurt me anymore. He can't get me."

She looks down, her cheeks still wet with tears.

"Can we please just relax and maybe get in the hot tub? I really just want to let it go, please," I ask her.

She nods her head.

••••

Later that night before we decide what we want for dinner, I claim I'm not hungry and that I'm tired so I plan to go to bed early. Well, it's now 11:30 and I'm wide awake. And so is my stomach.

I throw off the covers and decide to go get some food. When I walk into the kitchen, I see one light on, with Justin sitting at the bar eating something, ice cream maybe?

He looks up when he hears me coming.

"Hey," he waves his spoon at me. Yup ice cream.

"Uh hey, sorry I didn't know you were awake."

"You're all good. We missed you at dinner, Kea left a plate for you in the fridge."

I grab it and go sit next to him at the bar.

He's tense, and I can feel that he wants to say something to me. He knows, I can tell.

"She told you, huh?"

He looks at his bowl. "She couldn't keep it in Kristen, she tried so hard but I could tell she was upset about something."

I'm quiet, pushing the food around on my plate.

"You know, you can stay here for as long as you want right? You're family to Kea so you're family to me too. And family's have each other's back." He looks at me with strong eyes.

I start to tear up.

"Thank you, I really appreciate it."

We eat in silence after that, but a comfortable silence.

"I'm going to go to bed, I've got my first Dash practice tomorrow. Goodnight," he gives me a curt nod as I put my dishes away and then walk back into my room.

'Why did I feel like I could tell him anything and everything? I felt like I could trust him and I just met him.'

I fall asleep, dreading my first practice tomorrow.


	4. First Practice

**Kristie's POV**

I wake up before my alarm surprisingly. I get dressed in my Dash practice uniform Kea had gotten for me. I put my cleats and all my stuff in my bag. I'm excited but really nervous.

I walk into the kitchen to see Kea and Justin kissing. They stop when they hear me coming. Kea is blushing and Justin just shrugs his shoulders.

"Well good morning to the happy couple."

Kea rolls her eyes but smiles.

"So what do you want for breakfast on a practice day?" she asks me.

"I just usually eat a banana."

She raises her eyebrows and Justin looks up.

"Really?"

"Yeah" I shrug my shoulders.

Kea grabs me a banana and says "You can eat it in the car, we have to get going."

"I'll just go get my phone and then I'm ready to go."

I grab my phone and my bag I left on the counter and meet her in her car.

When we pull up to the stadium, I'm nervous. Kea can tell because when she parks she doesn't turn the car off but looks at me.

"Kristie, it's going to be fine. The coaches and girls are super excited to meet you."

I nervously wring my hands together. She reaches over and grabs them, looking me in the eyes. "I've got your back out there, okay?"

And I believe her. "Okay, then let's go."

I tell myself that I can't let these people see the weak side of me, so I square my shoulders and we walk in. I know that I normally come off as a bitch, but I like it that way. Then people don't mess with me and they take me seriously. 

**Rachel's POV**

I see Kea get out of her car and squint to see who's with her.

'Of course it's Mewis,' I roll my eyes and huff.

Jane hears me. "Dude, seriously take it easy on her okay? It's her first day."

"Yeah whatever," I roll my eyes.

Since we live together, me and Jane carpool, it's just easier that way.

I walk into the locker room to find it pretty much full, except for a couple of people including Kea and Kristen.

I set my stuff down at my locker and look over at Sophie, my locker buddy who also happens to be one of my best friends.

"Have you seen her yet? She's smokin hot," Sophie nudges my shoulder.

I roll my eyes and ignore her. The locker room is buzzing, waiting for Kristen to come in so we can all meet her.

The door opens and everyone looks up. It's Kea and Kristen. Everyone gets quiet.

Kea rolls her eyes, knowing this would happen. Kristen on the other hand, has a scowl or a frown or resting bitch face? I'm not sure which one it is.

Kea walks to the center of the room, all eyes on her.

"Since everyone is here, I'd like you to all meet Kristie!" Kea claps her hands excitedly and smiles, I can tell she really likes Mewis.

Kea looks at her like 'go on' so she coughs and then says "Hey, I'm Kristen. People call me Kristie or Mewis."

We expect her to say more but she doesn't. Kea rolls her eyes and says "She's here from Chicago and we're super excited to have her here!"

Mewis looks unamused. I scoff.

"So why don't we get ready for practice and meet out on the field in 10?" Kea says.

Whatever the captain says, goes so everyone gets their stuff.

Kea points out her locker to her and then walks over to me. 'Well shit, I know what's coming,' I think to myself.

"Kea, first off I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said those things on the phone or through text. I was pissed."

"Yeah Rach, I freaking know. Just please, for easy on her today, for me?"

I don't like it when my best friend's mad at me so I nod my head. She hugs me so I know we're okay.

I look over to see Mewis on her phone, scowling, again.

"Hey Kristie, let's head out," my captain says.

She locks her phone and gets up.

She walks over to us and she's sizing me up, trying to decide if I'm a friend or a foe.

"Rach this is Kristie, Kristie this is Rachel Daly."

"Yeah I know who she is," I say.

Kea ignores me and pulls Kristie out the door. I hear her say "Ignore her, she's just grumpy."

Practice starts out smooth, we do partner drills and luckily I don't get paired with her. But I get paired with Sophie, who's talking about how hot Mewis is the entire time just to annoy me. Kea is paired with Kristen of course. I know the captain is scared to leave her on her own, out for the wolves to get her. AKA the rest of the team. 

During our first water break, Sophie goes on her Instagram account and pulls up all the pictures of her where you can see her body.

"Come on Rach, admit it, she's hot."

"Eh, not my type."

"Smoking hot with a rocking body isn't your type?"

Coach calls us back to practice thankfully, because honestly I didn't have an answer to that question. 

I look over at her from time to time, she's paired with Amber now because they play the same position and they're not really talking. Mewis scowls all the time so I can't read her at all. 

We decide to play 6v6 and luckily I'm not on the same team as Mewis, but that now means that I get to go against her. 

It's me, Betsy, Lindsay, Jane, Cami and Ally against Kealia, Kristen, Amber, Bianca, Sofia and Nichelle. 

It's back and forth for a little while, neither team able to score. Mewis has been holding their backline pretty well and I'm annoyed that I can't get by her. She gets the ball from me and is trying to send it up the field when I accidentally on purpose shove her. 

I know from past experience that she isn't afraid to take players down and I'm not about to let her do that to me. She falls and coach blows the whistle. 

"What the hell Daly?" she says to me. 

"Oh sorry, my bad," I say sarcastically. 

She glares at me and gets up. 

We start again and their team has the ball. I shoot and Mewis blocks it, "Damn it," I say under my breath.

"You're going to have to try harder next time," she says with a smirk. 

"Nice job Mewis," Bi yells from the goal, giving her a thumbs up. 

They end up winning 1-0, only because Mewis won't let anyone through their backline. I'm pissed that we lost, but even more annoyed because she's such a good player. 

We break for lunch and I walk in with Jane, she's trying to talk to me but I'm too busy, glaring at Mewis. 

After we put our stuff down and grab our phones, we head to the room where the food is set up.

Kea is in line with Kristen, Amber talking to both of them.

Mewis' phone goes off and she hits ignore, Kea looks at her with eyebrows raised. I know the questioning Kealia Ohai look too well.

It goes off again and Kea softly says "Just take it Kristie." The girl huffs, putting her empty plate down before walking out.

Amber looks at our captain but she just shakes her head.

After I finish eating and chatting, I look over to one of my best friends and see that she's upset, pushing her food around. Kea keeps looking at the door, I'm assuming she's waiting for Mewis.

They tell us that lunch is over and the newbie finally walks back in, the same old scowl on her face.

'She didn't eat lunch,' I think to myself. But then I shake my head, wondering why I care. 

When I told Kea I would try to go easy on her this morning and I tried. Kind of. Not really. After a rough hour of more drills, I kick the ball towards her with too much force, hitting her in the stomach. She stumbles but catches herself. Kealia runs from across the field to her, ignoring everyone's questioning looks.

Normally the captain wouldn't run over to someone who got hit so everyone is confused. 

Mewis is grimacing like the ball hit her like a freaking truck. 'The ball barely hit her and she's being a little baby,' I think to myself annoyed.

Kea looks really worried about her but Mewis is trying to brush it off.

"Come on it wasn't even that hard of a hit," I yell from my spot on the field, annoyed at both girls.

Nichelle looks at me with her eyebrows raised, "Rach, you've been going after her since practice started and you're only getting rougher. Chill out."

"No I haven't, she just can't get the ball. It's not my fault she keeps getting hit."

Coach calls for a ten-minute water break for everyone to cool down. Mewis gets her water bottle and sits a little way away from everyone else.

"Oh shit, you're in trouble," I hear Jane whisper to me. I look up and am met with a fuming Kealia Ohai.

"You and me, we're talking," she grabs my arm and yanks me away from the group.

"What the hell Rach? Why are you doing this to her?"

"I'm not doing anything Kea, I'm literally just practicing like I would with anyone else."

"No you're not, and I know it Rachel. Everyone here does except for her because it's her first fucking day."

My eyes widen. Kealia doesn't cuss, at all, so now I know I've really gone too far.

"Get your act together Rach and start acting like a part of this team." She walks off, leaving me there.

I look over at Mewis and see Jane talking to her. I roll my eyes, 'Really? Jane you too?' I think to myself.

As practice goes on, it's easy to see why Mewis is labeled as one of the best defenders in the league. She plays her position really well and helps out the midfielders and forwards whenever she can. 

At the end of practice, everyone is sweaty and tired, having worked their butts off. I'm slightly less annoyed by her presence but I still want nothing to do with her.

After coach dismisses us, I walk over to Jane who's taking to Kea. They're laughing, so I ask what's so funny. Kea just glares at me and then picks up her pack, leaving me and Jane alone.

Jane shakes her head and says "I'll meet you in the locker room, I'm going to shower so you can take your time." I nod my head.

I'm the last one to leave the field after practice, taking a few minutes to cool down. I'm pissed at myself for how I acted, but I still don't like the girl.

As I walk into the locker room, I see Kea and Mewis talking to each other. They don't see me but I can hear their conversation.

"Kea, I'm fine."

"Kristie, please let someone look at it."

"It didn't even hurt. I don't know why you're so worried."

"You know exactly why I'm worried, it looks worse than before Kristie..."

"I've had worse," she says shrugs, but Kea's face goes dark, looking at the ground.

Kea looks up and sees me in the room. She turns and shuts her locker. Mewis gets the picture that it's time to go but doesn't know it's because I'm there. Kristie has the most annoyed look on her face, and I feel like that's the only face I'll be seeing from her for a while.

The ride back to the apartment complex is quiet. Jane is upset with me, so is Kea, and probably half the team.

When I park Jane gets out and slams the door. I wince and think 'Yeah, she's pissed.'

"You know Rach, I can take your shit because I love you and am one of your best friends. But Kristie didn't do anything to deserve the hell you put her through today. So what is it Rach that makes you dislike her so much?"

I pull at my hair, "I don't fucking know Janie, I can't figure it out. I think I've just thought so badly of her for such a long time and I don't think my views are going to change."

"She's actually pretty cool once you get to know her. Maybe you should try."

Jane leaves me in the parking lot, frustrated. I want to hit something so bad but there's nothing to hit so I slam my door, the echo bouncing along the concrete parking garage.

"Fuckkk," I look around, feeling more alone than ever before.

I sign, and head to my apartment, prepared for the coldness I'm about to receive.


	5. Turmoil

**Kristie's POV**

Kea had been in a bad mood since the beginning of practice and I can't help but wonder what's it about.

I look over and see her gripping the steering wheel tightly as we head back to her house after we left the locker room. 

I sigh, "Kea, what's up?" with a pointed look.

"Nothing, nothing!"

"Kea..."

" Kristie..."

"Kealia Mae Ohai. Tell me what's wrong."

She lets out a frustrated yell. "Rach was really pissing me off today. She was so rude to you and it was so uncalled for."

I roll my eyes, "Kea, you're overreacting. And I can handle myself. Nothing but a little friendly competition."

"It wasn't friendly Kristie and you know it."

I shrug my shoulders, trying not to be bothered by it.

She sighs as we pull up to their house. "Kristie, I know you put on a front for everyone else, but you don't have to do that for me, you know that."

I reassure her yet again, that I'm fine.

When we walk into the house, Justin is on the couch and he looks up when he hears us come in.

I'm immediately taken back to practice earlier...

_I walk out of the lunchroom as my phone rings again._

_The name "Jules" shows up again. This time, I answer it._

_"Julie-"_

_"Kristen Anne Mewis I am LIVID with you. How COULD you? We_ _had to find out from an NWSL announcement, you didn't even tell us! And you move without saying goodbye-"_

_Her voice cracks at the end and I hear her start to cry._

_"Why didn't you tell the team? Or me? Damn it, Kristie we're best friends! We didn't even get to say goodbye!"_

_I knew my friend was mad at me, I was mad at myself._

_"Julz, I-I had to go. Stuff was happening and I couldn't stay around. I'm sorry I didn't tell you and I'm sorry I didn't say goodbye but I had to do what was best for me. Please know that."_

_"What was happening?"_

_"Julz, I-I can't talk about it right now," my voice cracking at the end._

_"Kratch, what's going on? Are you okay? Please talk to me."_

_"Julz I'm at practice right now so I can't talk okay? But I'll call later and we can talk okay?"_

_She's quiet. "Just make sure you call me back okay? You can't just decide to move across the country and not answer your phone for three days. I'm still so mad at you for that."_

_"I know, okay? I'm sorry. But I really have to go now. I love you Julz," I had never told her that before so I think she's surprised to hear it._

_"I love you too Kratch, you know that."_

_"I do, I promise to call you later. I really gotta go now."_

_After I hang up the phone, I realize I had been crying_.

'_Damn it, pull yourself together. You're not this weak,' I think to myself._

_I know I can't go back into the lunchroom like this so I go to my locker to get my water, deciding to just stay in here._

_When I open my bag, I see a granola bar, an apple, and a sandwich. Confused, I pick the granola bar up and see a note taped on._

_'Kristie, I know that you need more nutrients than a banana for breakfast and so do you. Kea is worried about you. Family takes care of family, so please for her, and me, eat something. Good luck at practice, kick ass. - Justin'_

_I'm lost for words. First, confused as to when he could possibly do this, and second because he was so kind. He did this without Kea knowing because I know she never would say she was worried about me to my face, so that means he must care._

_I put my back against the wall and sinking down, with the granola bar and sandwich in my lap._

_I know I need to eat more, I'm an athlete, I need more protein and calories. But I also need to take better care of myself. Marks's words keep running through my head and I need to stop letting them get the best of me._

_As I open up the granola bar, my phone lets me know I got a text message. When I look, I see I have 38 messages from different people._

_I sigh ignore them._

When I come to, Justin and Kea are looking at me, worriedly.

"You okay Kristie?" Kea asks worriedly.

"Yeah, yeah I'm okay." I look at Justin and raises his eyebrows. I nod. He knows I got his note.

"Um, I'm going to shower, do you guys want to get dinner afterwards? Maybe you can show me around Houston a little?" This is my peace offering to Kea, showing an interest in food and the town I now call home.

"Really?" she asks with a smile.

"Yes, one hundred percent." She claps her hands excitedly.

Justin says he has a meeting for his football team and can't miss it. I think to myself 'Does he really have one or is he just letting us go by ourselves so we can talk?'.

We decided to do Italian, even though it's a little heavy for me, but Kea really wants to show me this place.

In the shower, I let the warm water run over me. I look at my bruises and my scars. My heart starts beating really fast and it becomes harder to breathe.

Anxiety attacks. Ever since that night I've been getting them more frequently. I used to have them as a kid but they went away with time.

I tell myself that I am okay, that I am safe, and that I am enough.

My heart rate slows down and I can breathe again. I turn the water off and get out, wrapping the towel around me quickly, I don't want to see my bruises in the mirror.

••••

Dinner was good. I got a light pasta with some chicken, gotta have that protein.

Kea tells me me all about Houston. The things to do, where to go, what stores to shop at.

When she takes a sip of her drink, I see my opportunity for a conversation I need to have with her.

"So, I've been thinking and it's time for me to move into an apartment."

She almost spits out her drink.

"What? Really? Kristie you just got here three days ago. You know you can stay with us for as long as you want."

"I know Kea and I really appreciate it, but I need to start getting into a routine, getting settled in, ya know?"

She hesitates. I can tell she doesn't like this idea.

"Since you are an adult, I can't tell you no."

I sigh, happy that she's on my side.

"There is an apartment complex that the Dash rent out for players to stay in, I think there's an empty one. I can ask if you want?"

I nod my head.

We finish dinner and then get in the car, both of us quiet. I look out the window, as my friend starts to speak.

"Do you want to go check it out?"

I look at her, "Sure."

"Let me call Jane so she can let us in."

We pull up outside a beautiful apartment complex that's right next to what I think is a river and a park. I get out of the car, taking in my surroundings.

Jane opens the lobby door and yells "Oy! Over here!"

Kea hugs her as we walk in and Jane smiles at me. I don't reach to hug her because I don't hug people, I think she can tell since she doesn't try to hug me either.

"So you're thinking of moving in?" the keeper asks me.

"Uh, yeah. I figured it was time to leave the two love birds alone and get out on my own."

Kea rolls her eyes while Jane chuckles. "You know we'd love to have you stay longer Kristie."

I shake my head no, this girl doesn't want to let it go.

Jane says "Well pretty much everyone else on the team lives here, we have a pool, gym, parking garage. There are one and two bedroom apartments and each one comes with furniture, a kitchen, stuff like that."

"Cool."

"I can show you my apartment, not sure how clean it is but it'll give you a sense of things."

"That'd be great thanks," I say as Jane leads the way.

When we stop at our door she says, "There is one thing I have to tell you, I live with Rachel."

'Great,' I think to myself. 'I thought I was done with her for the day.'

Jane opens the door and you can hear the tv on and someone cheering.

"Janie you missed it, the Astros scored!" Daly looks up, expecting her friend to be there but is surprised to see me and Kealia.

Daly frowns. I look around and see a couple of other people there, I know Amber and Bianca, but those are the only names I remember. 

"Kea! Kristie!" Amber jumps up to hug Kea and when she tries to hug me I just stand there. Kea can sense my nervousness so she pulls Amber off of me, trying to distract her.

I don't think anyone could see my uncomfortableness so I just shake it off.

"What are you doing here?"

Jane rolls her eyes at her friend, "Kristie is going to be moving into the building so I figured I'd kinda show her around."

Daly's face darkened. I had been too focused on Amber to notice that Rachel is only in a sports bra and sweatpants. I don't think she was expecting visitors.

But I have to admit, she's really fucking hot. I had never looked at her body before but now that I am, I can't stop. I don't know how I didn't see it, but I do now.

"Nice," she huffs, rolling her eyes. She walks to her room and slams the door shut. It echos through the apartment.

"Did I do something?" I ask. Everyone looks at me and shakes their head.

"She's just like that sometimes, sorry," Jane says.


	6. Tension

**Kristie's POV**

After Jane finishes showing us around, we head back to the house.

Kea is quiet. I know she's mad at her friend but I'm not that upset about it. If she wants to be a bitch, she can be a bitch. I'm not going to sink to her level.

"I'm pretty tired so I think I'm just going to call it a night," I tell Kea after we walk in.

"Yeah okay, goodnight Kristie," she gives me a quick hug, but I know she wants to stay longer.

After I shut the door I sigh. I know I need to call Julie back but I'm really not in the mood.

Remembering how hurt she was when I talked to her earlier, I decided she deserved to know why I left. I'm not going to tell her what happened, just that me and Mark broke up and I need to get away.

I hit "Julz" and get ready for a conversation I don't want to have.

•••••

I wake up with a pounding headache.

Last night I ended up telling Julie everything. My original plan failed when she started asking too many questions. Plus she knows me too well to know when I'm lying.

She took it the way I thought she would. She was upset, really upset, but she understands now why I needed to leave. She agreed not to tell anyone after I asked her.   
  
  


I look at myself in the mirror and you can see I had a hard night. I have bags under my eyes and my face is blotchy.

'Just great' I think to myself. 'Just what I need.'

I walk out with all of my stuff, to see Justin in the kitchen alone. He looks up when he sees me.

"Hey kid," he says. I roll my eyes, "You're like three years older than me, max." I say.

He shrugs and Kea walks in, ready to go. She looks at my face and her eyes soften. I shake my head, not wanting to talk about it. I grab a banana and head to the car.

**Rachel's POV**

I don't know why I was so pissed last night about her moving in. I guess it's because I don't want to see her any more than I have to.

Jane was annoyed with me, Kea is still mad at me. I can't fucking win.

When I get into the locker room, I see everyone getting ready. Kea is talking to Sophie, leaving Mewis standing by herself. Her signature bitch face is on.

I roll my eyes and get ready for practice.

After a few drills we take a break. Kea sits down by Mewis and everyone follows. I roll my eyes.

Not wanting to sit alone, I squeeze in between Jane and Nichelle.

"So Mewis, why'd you decide to leave your team like that? I heard you didn't even tell them you were leaving."

Everyone's eyes jump to me. Kea is glaring but I ignore her.

"I made the decision to move because it's what needed to be done. The people who needed to know about my move, knew."

"I heard you didn't even tell them, that's a pretty bitchy move."

"Rachel!" Jane elbows me. I keep going.

"Weren't you dating some guy too? Geez did you even tell him or did you just text him once you got here?"

Her eyes darken. I smirk knowing I've hit a nerve.

"Wow, Rachel you seem to be really interested in my personal life for some reason. Sorry but I'm not into you sweetheart." She smirks.

"That's enough," our captain gets up angrily, "both of you."

Coach blows the whistle so we know our break is over. I take one last sip of water before going back onto the pitch. Tension is rolling off my shoulders.

•••

The rest of practice was hell. I kept getting annoyed with every single thing she did, I didn't have an explanation for it, just that I hated her. She was so good and she didn't even try.

Kea still hadn't talked to me. I tried after practice to talk to her but she just said "Save it Rachel," and walked away. That made me even more pissed.

I walk into the locker room and of-fucking-course she's there. "Great," I mutter under my breath.

She must've heard me because she rolls her eyes and turns to face her locker. I look at my phone and in the corner of my eye I can see her take off her sweaty practice shirt to put on her regular shirt.

I try really really hard not to look and I almost make it. I look up just to see her slipping it over her sports bra and I see something on her back.

It's big and purple and it looks like a bruise. 'Why the hell does she have a bruise on her back like that?' I think to myself. 'Wait, why do I fucking care?' I turn around before she seems me checking her out.

The door opens and Kea walks in with an envelope and some papers. "Okay so I've got your forms and your key, you're good to go Kristie!" She smiles at her but then when she sees me she stops.

Kristie sees our interaction and huffs. "Just talk to each other for gods sake. I'll be waiting in the car." She grabs her stuff and walks out.

I look at my hands. Kea is looking anywhere but me.

I break first. "Kea-", I don't know what to say after that.

"I don't know who you are right now Rach. I've never seen this side of you and I don't like it. She's really a nice person and she's been through hell-"

"Yeah 'hell' Kea. She left her fucking team like that! She didn't even tell them! Does her boyfriend even know?"

I don't know why I care about her boyfriend. It shouldn't matter to me.

"Stop right there. You need to back off Rachel. You don't know what she's going through. Leave her alone. If you don't start acting like a member on this team, count yourself out for next week's game." She grabs her bag and storms off.

"Fuck!" I punch my locker, 'Damn it, Daly' I think to myself.

Jane is waiting for me by the car when I walk out. I unlock it and she looks up, her eyes jumping to my hand.

"What the hell did you do Rach?"

"I punched the fucking locker J, what do you think happened?"

On the way home she tries to talk to me about it but I tell her I don't want to talk. When we get home I got straight to my room and slam the door.


	7. Health

**Kristie's POV**

I've been living in my new apartment for a few days, choosing the two bedroom one instead of the one bedroom. I was hoping that maybe Sam or Steph would stay there but at this rate, I don't think they'll want to see me anytime soon.

I picked out really simple furniture. Black and whites, my kind of style.

Being alone here isn't as bad as I thought it would be. It's nice having my own space. I still see Kea at practice so it's not too bad.

I get ready for practice and as I look at my phone I see that I'm already late, "Shit" I mumble.

I don't have time to grab a banana before I run out.

I make sure to grab the keys to my new car. I didn't want to have to rely on anyone while living here so I figured I needed a way to get around.

I went to the dealership yesterday by myself to pick something out. I ended up getting an Audi S5, in white. Yeah it's a little splashy but I decided to spoil myself.

Luckily I make it to practice with a few minutes to spare. When I get inside I see that everyone had already went out onto the pitch. I throw my stuff down and head out.

Daly sees me coming out behind everyone else and rolls her eyes. I ignore her, just like I have been for the past few days.

"What, we're you too busy texting your boyfriend to come to practice?"

'Don't react Kristie, don't react.'

"Let's fucking go Mewis, we're waiting on you."

"Rach, we're fine," Amber yells at her.

After a few passing drills, I'm feeling pretty light-headed but I don't want to sit out. Daly would have my ass and I don't want to give anyone a reason to doubt my skills.

We take a water break and I see Kea walking over towards me with a look on her face.

"Kristie, are you okay?" she asks as she gets closer.

"Y-yeah, I just," and I don't finish my sentence.

All I see is black.

**Kealia's POV**

"Kristie!" I reach for her and she falls into my arms.

"Kristie! Oh gosh, help!"

I try to let her down gently, shaking her. I hear people yelling but I'm too focused on my friend.

I hear Jane say "Shit..." under her breath.

The medical team is rushing towards and everyone is standing around, looking down worriedly.

"Kea, you need to move so they can help her," I hear Nichelle say, trying to pull me back.

As the medical staff is checking her vitals and her pupils, one of the techs Sarah reaches for her shirt, about to get her stomach.

I remember her bruises and look up to see everyone looking down.

"You can't do that," I say stopping her.

She looks at me like I'm crazy, "I have to Ohai."

I shake my head, "Then you can't do it here," I say looking up at everyone.

I'm not going to let everyone here see what that horrible man did to her, it's no one's business and Kristie is a private person.

She starts to come to, confused and dazed. She tries to sit up.

"Kristie, hey it's me," I say reaching for her face. "You're okay. You just passed out. We're going to take you inside so they can check you out."

She nods her head slowly.

"Okay let's stand you up," Sarah says. Kristie tries to stand up but stumbles. Jane catches her. "You're okay," she says, concerned.

When Kristie sees everyone look at her she turns even redder, and mutters "fuck".

I look at Jane and say "I'm going to go with her. You guys can take a water break and then start again." Jane nods her head.

I take Kristie's arm, helping her walk off the pitch.

When we get inside, she gets on the medical table and lays down. I get her some water as she closes her eyes.

Sarah comes over, "Okay so I'm going to ask you a few questions, and then I need to check you out okay?" Kristie nods.

"Okay, so what did you have for breakfast this morning?"

"Uh, nothing I was running late."

My eyes widen and I look at her.

"Okay, then what's the last thing you did eat?"

"What did we eat for lunch yesterday? Chicken right?" She looks at me.

I say, "Everyone has chicken, you barely ate a salad."

"Oh yeah, so a salad," she nods.

Sarah looks up at her from her clipboard as I realize what's going on. She hasn't been eating. I could watch what she ate when she was staying with me and Justin but now that she's not there, I can't.

I have a gut feeling it's because of what Mark used to say to her. She told me that he used to call her fat, tell her she needs to lose weight, complaining about the way she looked. My heart sinks.

"It says here you have low blood sugar too?"

"Hell, Kristie, why didn't you tell me? Why haven't you been eating? You know how important protein is because you're an athlete, and even more because of this!"

She looks down, not able to meet my eyes. Her eyes start to tear up.

"Okay, so I think we know what the problem is here then," Sarah says. "You need to rest for the rest of the afternoon, go home and eat something, please."

Kristie is upset by the fact that she's out for the rest of the day, but even if Sarah would have let her back out, I would've put her on the bench.

"Justin is going to come to pick you up," I say firmly, not giving her an option.

"But Kea-"

"No Kristen. This is not up for discussion."

When she hears her full name, she knows she can't change my mind. I sigh. I don't want to be too hard on her but this is her health we're talking about. She's still recovering from Mark, she doesn't need anything else to happen.

I hug her softly. "Kristie, you know I love you and am here for you. I care about you too much. Please don't do this to yourself."

She looks up with tears in her eyes. Seeing her cry makes me cry.

She nods her head.

**Rachel's POV**

Well shit.

Kea had been in there for a while now. We're trying to practice but no one is really working too hard.

I see my best friend walk on to the pitch and I walk over to her.

Her face is blotchy, I know she's been crying.

"Kea, what's up?" I grab her shoulders, forcing her to look at me.

She starts crying and all I can do is wrap my arms around her. I rub her back soothingly.

I'm not sure what's going on, but seeing as that my best friend is crying, I know it's something serious.

"I-I can't tell you everything because it's not my place. But she just, she's going through something that I can't protect her from and she's not letting me help her. I feel completely helpless Rach."

I'm so confused. "Does it have to do with her moving here?"

"Yeah," she says, wiping her eyes.

I don't know what to say and I know Kea isn't going to tell me what's going on.

"Um, what can I do to make it better?"

"Be nice to her for god's sake Rach, please. I know you hate her, I'm not sure why, but she really doesn't need that right now."

I sigh, I know that I should stop being a bitch to her but every part of me doesn't want to.

But for Kea, I will. "I'll try Kea, I really will."

"Please, Rach, please really try."

"Okay, okay," I say holding up my hands.

"Where is she?" I ask, looking behind her at the doors.

"Justin came to pick her up."

My eyes widen. "Oh wow, really?"

She nods. "Yeah, he was home and offered to take her back to her apartment and stay with her until I get there after practice."

"Do you want to leave early? I'm sure coach won't mind."

She shakes her head. "No, I need to cool off before I see her again so I'm going to stay."

I hear someone coming and see Jane walk over. "Everything alright?" she asks.

"No, but it will be."

"We were all pretty worried about her."

Kea nods. "Okay, let's get back to practice."

I know that the conversation is now over, but I'm left with so many questions.


	8. Family

**Kristie's POV**

We stopped on the way home at Panera Bread. Justin said that he could make me something when we got to my apartment, but when I told him I didn't have any food he said we'll just have to pick something up.

He helps me into my apartment, not letting me carry my bag or the food.

"Okay, let's get you some food and then some rest."

I don't fight him on this. I know that I desperately need both.

I sit at the bar and empty out the bag. I got a roasted turkey and avocado BLT and a chicken Cesar salad. Light, but filled with protein.

Justin pulls out his food and sits down next to me. He's quiet for a while before asking, "Do you want to talk about it?"

I stop eating. "Not really."

He just nods his head, respecting my decision.

"Thank you... for coming to get me," I say quietly.

He looks me in the eyes and says "You're family Kristie, of course."

After I finish eating and throw my food away, I say "I'm going to go lay down." I expect him to get up but when he doesn't I know he's not going to leave me.

"Kealia said she wanted me to stay here until she got here after practice, she's going to drive your car over," he says sheepishly.

"You really don't have to do that," I assure him.

He looks at me quizzically. "I'm not leaving until she gets here, sorry kid."

I roll my eyes at the nickname. "Okay, whatever. You can use the TV if you want. Help yourself to anything you can find."

After I close my door, I reach for my phone.

I decide that it's finally time to call my sister.   
  


When I try to call her, I know she hits ignore because it goes to voicemail after two rings. I sigh, what did I expect honestly?

I text her

_To Sammy:_   
_If you're not busy, I really want to talk._

_From Sammy:_   
_Now you want to talk Kristie? After you left us and refused to answer our messages, ignoring us for almost a week?_

_To Sammy:_   
_I know Sam, but please._

_From Sammy:_   
_Steph is here. Is it alright if she listens?_

I bite my lip. 'Well, I'll only have to tell the story once now, and they'll be there for each other, so maybe this will be easier' I think to myself. 

_To Sammy:_   
_Yes, she needs to hear this too._

_Incoming FaceTime call from Sammy_

I hit accept nervously.

Neither of them look happy to see me, I shouldn't have expected a warm welcome.

"Um, hey guys." I wave nervously.

"Hello Kristen." Steph's voice is cold. I deserve it.

"What do you want?" My sister asks.

"I miss you guys," my voice cracks at the end. They look at each other skeptically.

Sam is the first to speak.

"Why Kristie? Why? How? How could you give us a three day warning saying you're moving across the country? You didn't even ask us about the move, you just decided. And then you haven't answered any of our messages, not a single one."

I look down, ashamed.

"I know, and I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"Are you really? Because it doesn't seem like it. You've been ignoring us, leaving us all alone here. You hurt us Kristie."

"Fuck, I know, geez I know. I regret not tell you sooner but I don't regret moving."

"Did you just decide that we're not good enough for you anymore? Is that it? You got tired of your sister and friend, thinking you could do better after playing for the National Team? Well we don't need you Kristie, we're doing just fine on our own here."

"C-can I just explain please?"

"I don't want to fucking hear it Kristie," Steph says. My sister looks at her and then back at me.

"I want to know," my little sister says.

Steph looks at her, "You said you hated her Sam, she doesn't deserve to explain herself after what she did."

Hearing that my little sister, my first ever best friend, claimed that she hated me, broke my heart.

"Sammy?" I ask, the hurt clear in my voice.

She looks at me, her eyes the coldest I've ever seen, "Steph's right Kristie, I'm sorry, but I'm not ready to listen to you."

"But-"

Before I can say anything else, the FaceTime ends.

"Fuck" slips out of my mouth as tears slip down my face.

The front door opens and someone come in. Kea must have gotten out of practice.

I hear them talking but can't understand what is being said. I know she's coming to my room when I hear her steps along the hallways.

"Kristie?" she says while knocking.

She opens the door slowly, not knowing if I'm awake or sleeping. When she sees me crying, she immediately frowns and walks in, shutting the door behind her.

She lays down next to me and wraps her arms around me.

"They h-hate me Kea," I sob.

"Who hates you?" she asks while rubbing my back.

"S-sam and Steph"

"Oh hunny, no they don't. Have you talked to them?"

"I tried but they wouldn't let me explain, they said they were too hurt."

Kea doesn't say anything, she just holds me and lets me cry.

•••••

I must've fallen asleep because when I wake up it's dark outside. I hear voices in the kitchen, so I decide to emerge and go see who it is.

Kea, Jane, Amber and Nichelle are standing around the island talking.

Jane is the first one to see me, "Hey, how are you feeling?" The others turn to look at me.

"Uh hey guys. I wasn't expecting company..." I look at Kea. She shrugs her shoulders.

"We wanted to come check on you," Amber says.

I've never been good with my feelings, so I don't know how to respond.

"Oh, well thanks, you didn't have to. I'm okay."

Kea rolls her eyes, "They wanted to dummy."

"Oh."

"Are you hungry? We can order pizza or something?" Jane asks.

"No I'm-"

Kea coughs and gives me a pointed look.

"Actually um yeah, pizza sounds good." She smiles at my answer.

"Great! There's an awesome place that delivers here. What kind do you like?"

"Um, really anything I guess," I try to not eat pizza so I'm not really sure what I like.

"Okay, what does everyone else want?"

As Jane figures out what to order, Kea comes to my side and wraps her arm around my shoulders.

"We're not going anywhere, so get used to it," she says with a smile.

•••

Three boxes of pizza later, we're all sitting on the couch laughing about something Kea did during practice one day.

"She literally slipped ON the ball and landed face first,"

"I did not!"

"Kea, we all saw it, you can't deny it."

She's trying to frown but ends up smiling.

"Okay, maybe I did a little."

We crack up laughing.

Amber looks down at her phone, "Oh geez it's almost midnight, I need to get to bed."

Everyone gets up and picks up their paper plates to put in the trash.

"Yeah, I'm going to head out too," Nichelle says.

I walk them to the door, "See you guys tomorrow."

Jane stays a little bit longer. When Kea gets up to go to the bathroom, Jane is quiet.

"You know, I'm not sure what happened that brought you here, but I'm glad it did. You're a cool gal Mewis."

I'm surprised to hear those words come out of her mouth, mostly because I know she's best friends with Daly.

"Uh, thanks Jane. I'm glad I'm here too."

I finally ask a question I'm dying to know the answer to, "What did I do to Rachel for her to hate me so much?"

She is surprised by my question but sighs. "Honestly Kristie, I have no idea."

"That's just fan-fucking-tastic."

I'm pissed. What could I have possibly done for this girl I barely know to hate me so much?

Kea comes back in, "Hey Kristie, is it cool if I just crash here tonight? I'm too tired to drive home."

"Of course," I say, but I know her real reason. She's worried about my health.

Jane stands up and stretches, "I think I'm going to head out too, I'll see you guys tomorrow."

After she leaves I lock the door.

Kea is looking at me when I turn around.

"They wanted to come and check on you Kristie, really. They care about you."

I roll my eyes.

"Come on," I say, "Let's go to bed."

"Can I sleep with you?" my best friend ask, with puppy dog eyes.

I nod my head, glad to have the company.

I get in my pj's and give Kea some clothes to sleep in. After I brush my teeth I walk into my room to see Kea on her phone, she looks up when she sees me.

My pjs are a tank top and some sleep shorts, I don't think anything of it since that's what I normally sleep in.

I catch Kea looking at me, "What?" I ask.

She looks at the top my arm. "Oh." I have a bruise there, a nasty purple one. "It's fine Kea, let's just go to sleep, please."

She nods her head and doesn't say anything.


	9. Dreams

**Rachel's POV**

Everyone went to Kristen's apartment last night to check on her and visit with Kea but I didn't really want to go. One, I don't necessarily like the girl and two, I doubt she wanted me there.

Jane got back last night and I was still in the kitchen eating some cereal.

"You should've gone," she said.

"Yeah well I didn't want to."

She rolls her eyes at me. "Seriously Rach, what's going on? I've known you for a while and you've never acted this way before."

I set my bowl down. "Honestly, I don't know Jane. She just rubs me the wrong way, I just don't like her as a person."

"She's not that bad when you get to know her. She just.... doesn't show emotion it seems," she chuckles.

"Maybe it's because she doesn't have a heart."

"For christ sake Rachel."

I shrug my shoulders.

"Well I'm going to bed, we have practice tomorrow and since it's the last practice we have before a game, I know it's going to be rough."

I nod my head and tell her goodnight.

I sit at the bar a little longer, thinking. I know that for our game I need to at least be able to play with the damn girl. I sigh, put my bowl in the sink and go to bed.

•••••

The next morning as me and Jane are walking out our door, I see Mewis and Kea walk out of the Kristen's apartment.

Kristen looks at me and scowls.

"Good morning to you too," I say in a chirpy voice. She rolls her eyes.

Kea sighs, "Please don't start this, it's too early."

"I didn't do anything," I say holding up my hands.

Jane pushes me down the hall, "Let's go Daly," she says.

When we get to the stadium for practice, Jane looks at me before getting out of the car.

"Please just, don't kill her today. She had a rough day yesterday and we need her for the game tomorrow."

"Yeah yeah, whatever," I roll my eyes, grabbing my bag.  
  
  


Practice was intense today. We all were trying really hard, getting ready for the game tomorrow. We want to win obviously.

Mewis and I are paired together for blocking drills and neither of us are thrilled.

I try to complain to coach but he says he doesn't want to hear it.

I grab the ball and walk over to an empty spot on the field where we can practice.

I start to juggling with the ball when she says "I literally haven't done anything for you to be treating me like shit, Daly. So drop the fucking act."

I look at her. "I don't like you Mewis, if you haven't noticed. I don't like how you left your team without telling them, I don't like how rough you play, and I don't like your personality."

"And you think you're so sweet? You're acting like a bitch Rachel. I've been trying to at least act civilized but if you're going to straight-up treat me like shit, I'm not going to act all peachy to you either."

We're both scowling at each other.

"Just kick the fucking ball," she says.

We pass the ball in silence. When coach says it's time to switch drills I mutter "Thank god," under my breath.

We don't talk to each other for the rest of practice. Both of us glaring at each other from across the field.

We get out early since coach doesn't want to overwork us before the game.

Before I leave the field I hear my name being called.

"Daly," I hear coach Clarkson say.

I walk over to him, "Yeah coach?" I ask.

"Listen I don't know what's going on between you and Mewis, but it needs to stop right now. She's starting tomorrow and I can't have this tension between the two of you. It's affecting the entire team."

"But-"

"I don't want to hear it. Get your act together."

He leaves me standing there.

I let out a frustrated groan and head into the locker room.

It's empty except for Mewis, she looks up when she hears me walk in.

"Look, I know you don't like me and you know I don't like you, so let's just agree to not like each other."

She looks at me and smirks. "I think it's a little strange that you have so much hate towards me Daly when I haven't done anything to you," she gets up and walks towards me.

"I don't have to have a reason Mewis, except that you're a heartless bitch." She keeps walking towards me and I walk backwards into my locker. She stops in front of me.

"See if you actually got to know me, you'd know that what you just said isn't true." She's so close to me now I can see her eye color for the first time.

They're a weird mix of blue and green and I can't seem to stop staring at them.

"What, cat got your tongue Daly? Earlier you couldn't shut up and now you can't seem to speak," she rolls her eyes at me. "Listen, just do your fucking job tomorrow and I'll do mine, got it?"

I don't say anything. "Whatever," she rolls her eyes and walks out.

'Those eyes,' I think to myself.

My phone goes off and I'm pulled out of my trance. It's Jane.

I answer it and pick up my bag.

"Are you fucking coming?" she huffs.

"Yeah, yeah I'm on my way out now. Calm down."  
  
  


Later that night, I can't stop thinking about Kristen's eyes so I pull up her Instagram. I look at one of her selfie's and her lips catch my eyes. 'Those look so kissable,' I think to myself. I keep scrolling, seeing some of her previous posts. Soccer, sister, dog, selfie, beach, BIKINI.

I click on the picture, 'Damn, she is really fit,' I think to myself.

'What the hell are you thinking Rach? She's a bitch, don't go there.' I lock my phone a sigh, trying to get some sleep.  
  
  


_She's standing right in front of me, we're back in the locker room. She's saying something but I'm not paying attention to her words, only her lips._

_"Rachel fucking say something."_

_"H-huh?" I look up from her lips to see her scowling at me._

_"Ugh." She grabs her head frustrated. "Just talk to me, stop fucking ignoring me!"_

_"Oh baby, I haven't been ignoring you, I can't keep my eyes off you."_

_She looks shocked. "W-what?"_

_I lean in slowly, looking from her eyes to her lips. She doesn't move. When my lips touch hers, she doesn't pull away but she doesn't kiss back. I put my hands on her hips._

_She begins to kiss me back, pulling me closer. She puts her arms around my shoulders._

_I move from her lips to her jaw, then down her neck. My hands move from her hips to under her shirt. I kiss the spot under her ear and she moans. I smirk._

_"Shirt. Shirt."_

_"What?" I'm not paying any attention to what she's saying, too focused on wanting to hear that noise again._

_"Take your damn shirt off Daly."_

_I break away from her and lift my shirt over my head. She's watching me, biting her lip._

_"That's better," she smirks._

I wake up, sweating.

'What the hell?' I run my hands through my hair. I check my phone, 4:30 in the morning.

I try to go back to bed but I can't. "Fuck it," I say getting out of bed.

I put some workout clothes on and decide to go to the gym we have here. I need to let off some steam.

I head down to the gym. Luckily no one is there. I plug my phone into the speaker and hit my workout playlist. After about 45 minutes, I'm drenched in sweat. I pull my shirt over my head, no one else is there and I have a sports bra on.

I'm too focused on my breathing so hear someone walk in.

I hear a scoff and look up. Of-fucking-course it's Mewis. I hit the stop button on the treadmill.

"What the hell are you doing here?" she asks, annoyed.

"Uh, working out? What does it look like?"

She stands by the door, not knowing whether or not she wants to come in.

"I'm almost done so I'll be gone in like 20 minutes," I say.

She nods her head and walks towards the other treadmill. I go back to running, trying to ignore her. I catch her checking me out in the mirror along the wall.

"Take a picture, it'll last longer," I say smirking.

She scowls, knowing she's been caught.

I try not to look at her again, my dream still fresh on my mind. I block her from my mind and push myself harder.

I look up a few minutes later and see the girl running. I hadn't noticed when she walked in, but she's wearing tight pants and a tank top. I see bruises on her all along arms I hadn't noticed before.

Suddenly I want to know what happened to her, why she has those bruises there and why I hadn't seen them before.

She catches me staring at her and looks uncomfortable. Suddenly I'm embarrassed. "Uh, sorry."

I decide that I've had enough and get off the treadmill. I take a sip of water, watching her again. I can't help it and check her out. She does indeed have a nice ass. 'What are you thinking Daly? She's your teammate.' I shake the thought from my head.

"Don't work too hard," I say and open the door.


	10. First Game

**Kristie's POV**

She was so checking me out. I caught her in the act, but she also caught me checking her out. 

She also saw my bruises. I didn't think anyone else would be down here so I didn't think to cover my arms. She didn't say anything, but hopefully she won't say anything to anyone else. 

I focus back on my workout. Today is my first game with a new team and I can't disappoint them. I'm thinking about all the people that will be watching me, judging me.

'Don't focus on them,' I tell myself. 

I shake my head, trying to get rid of those thoughts. I turn up the pace on the treadmill and turn up my music.

I finish my workout an hour before I need to be at the stadium for pre-game practice. 'Damn,' I think to myself, seeing that I ran 11 miles. 

I get off the treadmill and head upstairs to shower and get changed. 

I skip breakfast, too nervous to eat, grab my stuff and get in my car.

When I get to the stadium and park in the player's parking lot, I see fans already there. "Okay Kristie, you can do this. Yes it's your first game with a new team, but you're a bad ass and you need to show them that," I say to myself. 

My heart starts racing but I ignore it and get out. I see Jane and Rachel getting out of a car together. When Jane sees me, she whistles. "Nice wheels Mewis."

"Thanks Jane," I smirk. Rachel just looks at me and rolls her eyes. 

"You ready for the game?" the keeper asks me.

"Yeah." I try to make myself sound not nervous, luckily they buy it. 

Me and Jane walk in together with Daly trailing behind us. 

**Starting Xi for the Houston Dash**

**Goal Keeper: Jane Campbell**

**Forwards: Rachel Daly, Nichelle Prince, Jamia Field, Cece Kizer**

**Defenders: Kristie Mewis, Amber Brooks, Lindsay Agnew**

**Midfielders: Haley Hanson, Kealia Ohai (C), Cami Privett, Sofia Huerta**

As we're warming up on the field, I look into the stands. I expect to see my parents and Sam but then I remember that I'm in Houston and Sam isn't speaking to me. 

I miss the ball from Rachel and she yells "Get it together Mewis!" I'm embarrassed. 

I push the thought of my family out of my head and kick the ball back to her. 

Coach Clarkson calls us to a huddle after we finish practice.

"Okay ladies, we're going against Seattle so we'll need to really push our defense and play up our forwards. They favor their left side so we'll start strong on that side. I know we've only had a week or two with everyone here," he looks at me as he says this, "but I know we can do this. We've got powerful players in all our positions." He looks at our captain to continue.

"Okay girls, we can do this. We know where they're weak so we'll hit them hard there. Try really hard to keep the ball by their goal, and make sure you're talking to each other."

We nod our head. "Dash on three. One, two, three DASH!" 

We break apart and head into the locker room. We have about 10 minutes before we walk out and start the game. I check my phone, seeing is Sammy answered

_To Sammy_

_Hey I really wish you were here in the stands like you always are. I miss you a lot Sammy. _

Read at 11:37 am.

I sigh "Damn it," and lock my phone. I usually have Julie to help calm my pre-game nerves but she's not here, obviously. We have a handshake we always do before we leave the locker room and then we make funny faces at the camera when we walk out. 

I feel my heart start racing and my palms start to get sweaty. My anxiety is starting to kick in. My hands start shaking and I'm trying to not let anyone see that I am breaking down. 

I reach in my bag for my anxiety medication. I don't normally need it because well, I have Julie and my family in the stands, but today I'm alone. I open up the bottle and put one of the pills in my mouth, taking a sip of water. I sit against the wall and put my head in between my legs, like I know how to do. 

Someone comes and rubs my back. I look up and see Kea's worried face. "Wanna take a walk?" she asks quietly. 

I nod my head and she helps me up. As we walk out the locker room door into the hallway, I catch Daly looking at me with a glare. 'Fuck,' I think to myself, 'She saw me take the pill.'

Kea loops her arm through mine and we just start walking. 

"Do you want to talk about it?" she asks.

I'm quiet before saying, "Me and Julie used to have this pregame ritual that would help with my nerves, ya know help keep my anxiety down. And then when we were on the field during practice I looked for my parents and Sam but then remembered that they aren't here and Sam still isn't talking to me."

"I didn't know your anxiety was back Kristie, why didn't you say anything?"

I shrug, "Well after Mark, it started getting bad again. I have meds to help, I actually took one a couple minutes ago. I haven't had to take one since I left Chicago."

She looks at me. "Well you know I'm always here for you if you need to talk or need some help."

"I know Kea but-"

"But what?"

"You know I don't like asking for help," I trail off.

"Oh trust me, I know." She says with a laugh. 

"Okay maybe that's something I need to work on." I laugh too.

She nods her head and looks at her watch. "Okay well we need to get back in there, what can I do to help you right now?" she asks me.

"I think I just need a minute to stand here and catch my breath." We stop walking. I lean up against the wall and she watches me.

She doesn't rush me, doesn't look at me with pity or hurt. She lets me take my time.

When I feel my heart rate slow down, I nod. "Okay, let's go."

We walk back into the locker room and there's music playing and people dancing. Someone must've gotten the aux and is trying to pump people up. Kea looks at me and smiles. She hugs me before walking over to get her captain's band. 

As we line up to walk out, Amber and Jane come up to me with smiles. "Are you ready for your first game as a Houston Dash?"

"Hell yeah." They pat me on the back and get in their order.

I just realized that I'm standing behind Daly. I roll my eyes at the irony. She looks back at me and says "Don't fuck this up."

"Geez Rachie, thanks for the support." I sarcastically give her a thumbs up. 

"People say you're one of the best defenders in the league, play like it."

I can't tell if that's a compliment or not. "Thanks, I think?"

The refs start walking out ahead of us so we know it's time to go. 

As I walk out, I hear the fans chanting and yelling. I look up and see the stadium covered in orange. People have Texas flags with the Dash logo on it, their entire bodies painted orange and banners everywhere. 

I smile to myself and think 'I could get used to this.'

The game starts and the craziness begins. 

We have the ball, then they have the ball, back and forth. Our back line is pretty strong, it's me, Lindsay and Amber with Jane in the goal.

One of the Reign players tries to get by me but I steal the ball and send it to Haley, who shoots it up to Kea. Kea gets pushed to the ground, pretty hard and the ref calls a foul. She gets back up and brushes herself off. I look at her, worried. She just nods her head so I know she's okay. 

We get the ball and Kea sends it to Rachel. Rachel shoots and misses. I see her say "fuck" to herself. 

Their goal keeper tries throws the ball to one of their midfielders but Haley gets it and runs it back to their goal. She's got their three defenders on her and sends it to Rachel again. This time she doesn't miss.

**"GOAAAAAAL for Rachel Daly! Nice assist from Haley Hanson!"**

The stands erupt into cheers and Rachel runs and jumps on Haley, celebrating, but their moment is over soon. 

The ball goes back into play and quickly it's near me. One of the Reign's forwards is trying to nutmeg me but I cut her off and shoot it back to Jane. Jane gets ahold of it before they can try to score. 

She looks at me and raises her eyebrows. I know she's going to send it to me so I nod. She kicks the ball towards me and I run it up the pitch. I've got two midfielders on my ass but I get by them. The crowd is roaring as I'm running. I look for someone to pass it to and I see Rachel open. We make eye contact and I shoot it towards her. She gets it on the ground and shoots. 

**"GOAAAAAAAAAL number two for Rachel Daly with an assist from defender Kristie Mewis!" **

The fans are cheering and Rachel runs and jumps on me. "That's what I'm fucking talking about Mewis!" She kisses my cheek but before I can react, Kea runs and hugs me. "Heck yeah Kristie!" she slaps me on the back.

No one else scores for the rest of the game. It was tough holding them there but we did it. After the final whistle blows, I look around and see the fans on their feet cheering. I smile as Kea runs and tackles me on the ground.

"Ahhh we won!" I laugh and hug her back. "You did great, the fans love you!" We get up and see the Reign walking towards us. We shake hands and say good game.

When we get back to the locker room, everyone is ecstatic. 

Jane looks around as says "Cle Houston?" 

Everyone cheers and I look at Kea, questioningly. 

"It's a night club we like to go to." 

"We don't have to go if you don't want to," she says to me. I shake my head, "No, I think it'll be fun." 


	11. Celebrations

**Rachel's POV**

We won the game and I couldn't be happier. 

I'm not sure what came over me when I kissed Kristen's cheek, but hopefully she doesn't think too much about it. 

After we all pick a time to meet at the club, Jane and I drive back to our apartment to get ready. 

"So what did you think about the game?" Jane asks me.

"I thought it went great, Mewis played decently and we won." 

"You know I saw that little peck on her cheek." 

My face gets hot, "It wasn't anything J, it was the heat of the moment," I try to convince myself.

"Uh-huh," she says. I just roll my eyes. 

"I went to the gym this morning because I couldn't sleep and she ended up walking in. I caught her checking me out, but she also caught me checking her out."

"Aha! I knew you thought she was hot!"

"Yeah yeah, I'll admit it. She does have a nice body." 

"I don't know if she's into girls though," Jane said questioningly. 

"I don't want to date her for Christ's sake. I just think she's nice to look at, geez."

"Well Rach, I mean, when's the last time you even hooked up with someone? Danielle? That was like two months ago."

"Wow, I didn't know you were keeping such a good record of my sleeping partners," I say annoyingly. 

"I'm just saying, tonight could be your night," she shrugs. 

We get to our apartment and head in to get ready. 

I'm wearing my signature jeans and a distressed tee look, and Jane has on black skinny jeans with a grey shirt. 

Neither of us takes a while to get ready, so we start drinking before we leave. I'm about one rum and coke in when I hear Jane say, "Oh Mewis and Kea are going to ride over to the club with us."

"Ughhhh," I draw out. "Whyyyyy?" 

Jane rolls her eyes, "Because Kea got ready with her and they asked if they could ride with us?" 

Before I could answer someone knocks on our door. "That'll be them," she gets up to go let them in. 

Kea walks in first and hugs Jane. She's got on a black dress that shows a little cleavage, hey the girl's got it, flaunt it sis, with black heels that are way too high for my taste. 

When Mewis walks in, my eyes widen and I suddenly can't breathe. Kristie is wearing a red minidress with sleeves, it's tight and you can see every single curve of her body. It's barely covering her ass. Her in heels make my knees weak. I choke on my drink. 

Jane whistles. "Damn Mewis! You came to play!"

"I like a good party," Kristie winks at her. 

"I know, doesn't she look hot?" Kea asks, pretending to fan her.

"Okay, okay, stop." She blushes. I never thought I would see the day where Kristen Mewis blushes.

She looks at me and sees me watching her, 'Damn it,' I think to myself. 'She caught me checking her out, again.' All Mewis does is smirk. 

"So what are we drinking?" Kea says as she walks to the counter. 

"Okay, the Uber will be here in 10," Kea announces.

"I'm going to go to the bathroom real quick." Kristie says.

"Down the hall, to the left," Jane points her in the right direction.

After she gets out of earshot, Jane raises her eyebrows at me. "So?"

"So what?"

"Dude, are you going to fucking do something? I totally saw you checking her out, and she totally checked you out too!" 

"No she didn't, stop saying that."

"What are we talking about?" Kea asks. 

"Daly and Mewis keep checking each other out and I'm trying to help out here by giving her a gentle push."

Kealia looks at me, a serious look on her face. "Don't Rachel. She's not one of your 'buddies', and she's too good to be a one night stand. Plus she's not ready for a relationship, she just got out of one," Kea kind of trails off at the end.

"She and that guy broke up?" Jane asks, surprised. 

"Yes but don't say anything. It's not anyone's business." 

"Kea, I'm not interested in sleeping with her, or am I interested in her at all. You don't need to go all mama bear on me, plus she's an adult who can take care of herself." 

We hear her heels coming down the hallway so we stop talking. 

"Is the Uber here yet?" she asks.

"Just got here, so let's head down."

We all grab our stuff and head out the door. Kristie is in front of me and I can smell her perfume, it's actual heaven.

"You smell really good," I whisper in her ear. She looks up at me and notices how close I am to her and it throws her off guard.

"T-thanks," she says, nervously. I smirk.

Luckily it's not a long drive to the club, but I am sitting next to her in the back seat with Jane on my other side and Kealia in the front. 

I'm trying to get situated and her hand accidentally touches my thigh. I swear I thought she electrocuted me. 

I don't know why suddenly being around her is making me so jittery. Jane looks at me and raises her eyebrows. I shake my head meaning 'yeah, I'm fine'. 

We when get to the club and get out, Mewis goes to pull her dress down, trying to cover more of her ass. I tell myself I shouldn't be watching but I can not take my eyes off her. 

We get inside and find the rest of the girls. Not everyone came out tonight but usual gang is here: Lindsay, Amber, Haley, Nichelle, Ally, Sofia and then me, Jane, Kea, and Mewis. 

"Bar or dance floor?" I hear Amber shout.

"Drinks!" Kristie yells. 

We make our way to the bar and the bartender immediately comes to us. I mean, wouldn't you if you were a guy and saw 10 hot girls? 

We order a round of tequila shots. Everyone passes around the salt shaker and grabs a lime. "One, two, three." 

I look up just in time to see Kristen lick the salt off her hand and throw her shot back. She bites the lime and we make eye contact. 

I have never been more turned on in my entire life. I take my shot and I can see her bite her lip. 

'What the hell am I getting myself into?' I think. I need to find Jane.

I grab her and pull her aside. "What's up Rach?" she asks

"You need to keep me away from Mewis, I physically can not stop myself from gravitating towards her, and I don't want to do something I'll regret." 

"Okay, I'll play interference but I'm not babysitting." 

"That's perfect, thank you." She nods her head. 

After about an hour of dancing and more drinks, I decide to head back to the bar. I need more alcohol if I want to keep going tonight. 

I feel someone come stand next to me, expecting it to be Jane or Lindsay but when I smell that damn perfume, I know it's neither. 

"Hey Rachie," she says.

I look up at her. "Mewis, you're drunk."

"No, I'm not," she slurs.

"Okay sweetheart, whatever you say." 

She turns to the bartender and asks for a gin and tonic. She's leaning in a little bit too far and the douche is looking down her dress, a clear shot of her boobs. I don't think she knows that she's basically flashing the dude so I stand her up and pull her next to me.

"What are you doing?" she asks confused.

"He's staring down your dress," I whisper in her ear. 

She lets out a soft "Oh" and I can feel her breath on my neck. 

He brings her the drink and winks at her. I grab it before she can say anything and wrap my arm around her waist, pulling her over to the booth we have. 

Jane sees us walking, her eyes wide. 

I help Mewis sit down and put the drink on the table in front of her. I sit on the other side of the table, as far away from her as I can. 

"Dude, I don't know what's going on but we can't stay away from each other. She's drunker than I am but even with me keeping my distance we still end up next to each other." I yell over the music into Jane's ear.

She just shakes her head at me.

We spend a little more time dancing but I stopped drinking a while ago. Kristen, on the other hand, has not. 

I decide I have had enough and yell to Jane over the music, "I think I'm going to head home."

"Are you sure, I can go with you if you want?"

"Nah you're having a good time, you stay with the girls."

She nods her head. I get up and grab my jacket, motioning to the door so everyone gets the picture. They all wave and try to yell bye over the loud music. 

My Uber says he'll be here in three minutes so I go wait outside. I hear the door open behind me and expect to find another party-goer heading home. I don't expect to find Mewis.

"What are you doing out here?" I ask confused. 

"I want to go home with you." 

"What?" 

"I want to go home too" she slurs. For a second I thought she said she wanted to go home with me.

She shivers in the night air, a breeze picking up. "Here," I say, giving her my jacket. When I put it over her shoulders, she stumbles. I grab her to steady her. 

"You good?" 

She nods, looking up at me with those damn eyes. 

I try to put some distance between us but she just grabs my arms, holding me there. Before she can do anything else, my phone goes off, letting us know our Uber has arrived. 

"Come on," I say, gently pulling her to the car.

The ride back to the apartment complex is quiet, Kristen is leaning her head against the window with her eyes closed. I get a good chance to really look at her.

Her once perfect ponytail is now messy and her makeup is wearing off a little bit. But she still looks beautiful.

'What the hell?' I think to myself. 'Stop it, Daly.' 

We get to the building and I have to help her out of the car. "Thank you," I tell the driver. 

She stumbles a little on the uneven pavement with her heels and I wrap my arm around the waist to steady her. "Here we are," I say leading her into the lobby. 

When we get to her door, she pulls her key out of her bra and I try not to watch, but damn if that wasn't the hottest thing I had ever seen.

I grab the key from her after her third time trying to get her door open. 

"There ya go," I say opening the door. She walks in, leaving the door open behind her. She takes her heels off and looks back at me.

"Are you coming in?" she asks innocently.

I know that I shouldn't. I know that she's drunk and I'm almost. I know I might regret it in the morning, but I go in anyway. 


	12. The Day After

**Kristie's POV**

I wake up with a pounding headache. I open my eyes but the sun is too bright. I reach for my comforter, trying to pull it over me, but when I try to pull it, there's someone else on it.

My face scrunches up. 'Oh no oh no no no. What the hell did I do last night?' 

I slowly open my eyes, trying to figure out who my new sleeping partner is. 

'Oh shit.' I immediately recognize the blonde.

Rachel fucking Daly is in my bed. 

I look under my comforter as see that I have a shirt on. I can feel that I don't have a bra on, but I do have underwear on. 

I get out on my bed, trying to be as quiet as possible. 

The bed moves and I hear Rachel start to stir. I stop moving, hoping she'll go back to sleep, my back is to her.

"Hey," I hear her say sleepily. Her morning voice makes me weak. 

I turn around slowly and see her sitting up. She has a shirt on. 'Okay so it can't be that bad,' I think to myself.

"Uh, did we um-?"

"Oh no, geez. You were drunk, I wouldn't take advantage of you like that."

"O-oh okay, well good." 

She nods her head.

"Then what did happen?" I ask nervously. 

"Well, when I wanted to leave the club, you said you wanted to come home too. So we took an Uber and then when we got back you invited me in. I wanted to make sure that you go to bed alright." 

I start to remember...

_"Are you coming in?"_

_She looks at me hesitantly before shutting the door behind her._

_"Ugh my feet are killing me and I can't breathe in this outfit," I say complaining._

_"Well no one could take their eyes off of you tonight so I'd say it was worth it." _

_I turn to look at her. "What about you? Did you take your eyes off me tonight?" I don't know what possessed me to ask her that, but I want to know._

_She bites her lip and visibly checks me out. "I couldn't even if I tried darlin." _

_"You didn't look too bad yourself," I wink at her. _

_She smirks like she knows it. _

_"Sooo how about something to drink?" I ask opening the fridge._

_"Uh, water is fine."_

_I grab the bottle of vodka, "I meant alcohol silly," I say._

_She tries to grab it from my hands. "I don't think you need any more of that Mewis, you've probably had enough." _

_She's suddenly very close to me. Her lips look so kissable right now. "You can never have enough," I whisper. _

_Rachel is studying my face. "Come on Daly," I say. "Have a little fun." _

_"Fuck it," she mutters._

_Before long we're sitting on my couch, playing truth or dare, but if the person doesn't want to answer the question or do the dare, they have to drink. _

_We're asking ridiculous questions or coming up with stupid dares, trying to get each other even drunker._

_"Ooh I have a good one!" I say excitedly. _

_"What is it?"_

_"I dare you....to kiss me." I'm proud of this one. I knew she wouldn't go through with it, so she'd have to take another drink. _

_She looks at me and grabs the bottle. "Ha!" I say. But then she puts the bottle on the table in front of us and scoots closer to me. _

_My eyes widen. This is not how I thought this would go. She's sitting right in front of me now. I can smell the alcohol on her breath. _

_She hesitates before leaning in slowly. I think she expects me to stop her. I expect myself to stop her, but I don't. _

_Her lips slowly touch mine. Neither of us moves for a second. I decide to make the move and deepen the kiss. She grabs my face and I put my hands on her hips. _

_She bites my lip and I moan. She takes that as her chance to put her tongue in my mouth, she's in control now. She pulls me on her lap and I'm now straddling her, my legs on either side of hers. My dress is riding up but I don't care. _

_Her hands are everywhere. Running down my sides, on my back, in my hair. _

_She moves from my mouth to my neck. _

_"We" kiss. "Should" kiss. "Probably" kiss. "Stop" kiss. _

_I don't bother replying, too focused on her lips and the way they're making me feel. _

_"Kristie" I finally open my eyes and realize what we're doing. _

_We're both breathing heavy, our faces flushed. _

_I nod and get off her lap, standing up. Now I'm uncomfortable. I can't believe I let that happen. _

_I'm looking anywhere but at her. _

_"Hey," she whispers, reaching for my hands. "It's not that I don't want to kiss you, that was the hottest kiss I've had in my entire life. It's just that we're both a little drunk and I don't want either of us to do something we'll regret in the morning." _

_I look at her sheepishly and she pulls me back down to the couch. "Okay now where were we? Truth or dare?" she asks me._

_"Hmm, truth!"_

_"Okay, why did you leave Chicago?"_

_I stop breathing and my eyes widen. I reach for the bottle, not wanting to answer the question. _

_"Oh come on, Mewis! What happened?" _

_"I don't want to talk about it Rachel."_

_"Ugh fine," she rolls her eyes, annoyed at my answer. _

_We end up drinking some more and talking until about 3 in the morning. I notice that Daly is falling asleep and push her shoulder._

_"Come on sleepyhead, you can crash here. Let me get you some clothes." _

_She follows me into my room. "I've never been in your room before Kristen." _

_"You've never been in my apartment before either," I scoff. _

_"True." I give her one of my big shirts and a pair of sleep shorts. _

_"Here you can borrow these."_

_"Thanks," she says. _

_I get my pj's out and start undressing, thinking she had left the room. When my clothes are completely off and I hear a gasp, I realize that she had in fact, not left the room. I turn around and use my shirt to cover my chest. _

_"Kristie...what happened to you?" _

_I had forgotten about my bruises. The dress I wore tonight did an amazing job at hiding them so no one had suspected or seen anything. But now Rachel saw. She saw my bruises and my scares. _

_She walks toward me slowly, looking from my arms to my stomach to the tops of my thighs. Her eyes are confused, lost. _

_I can't hide it anymore, she knows now. Every bruise that Mark had left on my body, every scar that I had been trying to hide. _

_"T-this is why I had to leave Chicago." I can't look at her, ashamed at myself._

_"Kristen...."_

_I had realized I was crying until she wiped a tear from my face. She looks at me with sad eyes. _

_"Okay, we don't have to talk about it. Let's get you to bed." She helps me pull my shirt over my head and then pulls back my comforter for me to lay down. _

_"You can sleep here, if you want," I say scooting over. _

_She looks at me hesitantly. I can tell she's weighing the pros and cons in her head. When she lays down next to me, I smile. _

_"Goodnight Rachel," I say._

_"Goodnight Kristen," I hear her say back._

I'm immediately brought back to the presentwhen my phone rings. "Shit," I say, and jump up. "It's Kea, what do I say?" 

"Hell, I don't know! We don't even know what she wants. Just act natural."

I hit accept.

"H-hey Kea, what's up?"

"Hey! I just wanted to call and make sure you're doing okay this morning. I know last night was a rough one."

"U-um why was last night a rough one?" I ask.

"Uh, because you had a lot to drink and you said your feet were killing you?"

"O-oh yeah. No, I'm fine." 

"Okay good! Do you know if Rachel made it home alright last night, she hasn't answered any of my calls."

"No, yeah she made it home fine. Yeah, we went separate ways after we got to the apartments."

"Okay, I'm just worried about her, maybe I'll call Jane."

"No! You don't have to do that. Um, I'll go check on her for you. I just need to get some clothes on first."

"Are you sure?" she asks questioningly.

"Yeah, totally. No problem. I'll let you know how she is when I get over there. Okay, gotta go now, bye Kea." I hang up the phone before she can say anything else. 

Rachel is looking at me with wide eyes.

"Okay, it's time for you to go now," I say, picking up her clothes and handing them to her. 

Now that I remember everything that happened last night, I want her out of my apartment. 

"Woah, slow down Mewis," she says as I pull her up off my bed.

"No, I need to shower and you need to leave. Now." 

"Okay, okay, calm down. I'll leave." 

I turn around as she changes. 

"So, are we going to talk about last night at all or what?" she asks.

"Nope, not going to talk about it, not going to think about it. Not going to say anything to anyone. Just pretend it didn't happen," I say ushering her towards the door.

"What if I don't want to pretend it didn't happen?" she asks breathlessly. 

"Well too bad, because I do. Goodbye." I say, shutting the door in her face. 

I sigh and run my hands over my face. 'What the fuck did I do?' I think to myself.


	13. The Truth Comes Out

**Rachel's POV**

She shuts the door in my face before I can say anything else.

'What the hell what that?' I ask myself.

I run my hands over my face, not knowing what to think. I walk over to mine and Jane's apartment and unlock the door. 

When I walk in I see Jane sitting at the bar, eating cereal.

"I was wondering where you went," she says. 

"I uh, I slept at Kristen's." 

She raises her eyebrows. "That's what I figured but I wasn't sure." 

I nod my head. "Did anything happen?" she asks.

"We, uh, we made out." 

Her jaw drops. 

"What the hell Rach? Kea is going to kill you!" 

"No, she won't because Mewis said she wants to pretend it didn't happen," I say frustrated. 

Jane is quiet. "Well, how was it?" 

I look at her surprised. She really wants to know. "Janie, it was hands down the hottest kiss I've ever had. I mean, her lips, oh my gosh. But I stopped before we went any further because we were both drunk." 

"Damn," she says.

"Yeah I know, and then she kicked me out a few minutes ago," I say annoyed.

"Oh shit, she kicked you out?" Jane asks laughing.

"Yes," I roll my eyes.

I think back over the night. My eyes widen at a sudden memory.

"Jane," I say.

"What?" 

"I think I know why she left Chicago." 

"Really?"

"Yeah.... I think....I think her boyfriend was abusive....." I trail off.

"Oh fuck. Really?" Jane sees the serious look on my face and knows that this is something I wouldn't say if I didn't think it was one hundred percent true.

"Did she say something or, like what makes you think that?"

"She had bruises all over her body. In places that you shouldn't have bruises. And there were so many of them," I choke out the last word. My heart breaks, thinking about her in that situation. 

Jane is silent before asking, "Do you think Kea knows? I mean she has to know, right?"

I think back to all the conversations I've had with my friend about the defender. It makes sense now why Kea was so protective over her and why she reacted the way she did when I talked shit about her friend.

"Fuck," Jane says. I nod my head. 

"I'm going to call her, just in case," I say.

I walk to my room and plug in my phone. It turns on and I get flooded with all the messages I missed during the night.

I hit "Kea" and put the phone up to my ear.

**"Hey! I was worried about you, what happened last night?"**

**"Oh sorry, yeah my phone just died." **She believes me because it's something that happens a lot actually.

**"I have a question to ask you," **I say

**"What's up?"**

**"It's about Mewis." **She's silent on the other end.

**"I saw her bruises, Kea, I know something is going on. I'm just worried about her."**

**"Rach, I-I can't tell you."**

**"She knows I know Kea. We talked about it." **That's not completely a lie. I just stretched the truth a little.

She sighs on the other end. **"Why don't you come over and we can talk about it?" **

**"Yeah, I'll head over. Jane knows...Can she come?" **I don't tell Kea that technically I told Jane and Kristen doesn't know that Jane knows.

**"Yeah she can come too, just, no one else can know about this okay?"**

**"Okay."**

I hang up the phone and see Jane standing in the doorway. "Kea said we can come over and talk if you want to come. You don't have to." 

She shakes her head. "No, I want to go." I can see the hurt in her eyes. Even though the defender has only been here for almost a week, the goalkeeper has come to care about her.

We head to Kealia and Justin's house in silence. Both of us thinking about what we're about to hear. 

When we get there, I turn off the car and look at Jane. 

"Are you ready?" I ask.

"No, but I need to know," she says.

We get out of the car and walk in the house. We don't bother knocking because they were expecting us. When we walk into the living room, I see Kea and Justin whispering to each other, Kea with tears on her face. 

I can now confirm that what I thought was true.

They look up when they hear us. Both of them look hurt. 'Justin must know' I think to myself.

We sit on the couch, silent. Kea looks at Justin and he nods.

"Okay, what I'm about to tell you, you can't tell anyone else okay? Not even her family knows this. I think just us and Julie are the only people that she's told."

"Her fucking family doesn't even know?" Jane asks, upset.

Kea holds up her hand, "Please, let me just tell you first." 

We nod.

"So, I got a call about two-ish weeks ago maybe? It was Kristen and she told me that she was trying to get traded to the Dash. She wouldn't say why, just that she needed a fresh start and to get out of Chicago.

I didn't think anything of it, I was just excited that she was coming. She got here the day before the trade was made public. I thought her family knew that she was being traded but it turns out that she told them three days before she left. They were SO mad at her. Heck, they still are. Neither Sam nor Steph will talk to her, she's tried explaining but they just won't listen...." she trails off. Justin grabs her hand.

"So when she got here I could tell something was wrong. She didn't want to talk about it but finally, I got her to tell me. She told me that she and Mark broke up a week before she moved. They had been dating for almost a year and seemed to be so in love, so I was surprised. 

Then she told me what happened... He had been hitting her. Since January. So for months now. And it wasn't just a slap, even though that still isn't acceptable. But he had been full-on beating her. And no one knew about it. Not her parents, not her sister, not her teammates, not even me. I was too blind to see it," her voice cracks at the end.

"You had no idea baby, no one did." Justin soothes her.

"But I should've seen it! Or she should've said something! She should've left him the first time he hit her."

"You know she couldn't have Kea, she told you what he said," Justin says.

Jane and I are waiting for them to fill us in.

"He threatened to kill her if she left him. So she stayed, scared to death. Fast forward two months and one night she said it had gotten so bad that she didn't care if he killed her. She left him, but before she left him she told him that she had pictures of every single bruise and scar he left on her body. If he tried to come after her, she was going to give the pictures to the police. So he didn't try to stop her, too afraid she would turn him in. She left Chicago a week later.

I didn't know it until that day at practice that she passed out, but Mark was mentally abusive too. He said horrible things about her body and her weight and the way she looked. 

She hadn't really been eating a lot because she believed what he had been saying. When she passed out and the tech tried to check her out, I freaked out because I didn't want anyone to see her bruises. That's why we went inside. 

And when we got in there, Sarah asked what the last thing she had eaten was and it had been lunch the day before. She didn't eat dinner or breakfast. And then why Sarah asked if she was hypoglycemic too I got mad at her. She knows her body's limitations and I just was frustrated that she would let it get that bad." 

"Wait, what is hypoglycemic?" Jane asks.

"Hypoglycemia is when your body doesn't produce enough protein and iron so you have to eat twice, or three times the amount that a normal person would eat. They can have their blood sugar drop as quickly as every two hours. If it gets too low, they can go into hypoglycemic shock." Kea explains

"Oh shit."

"Yeah. Kristen knew she was hypoglycemic too. I had no idea. But now that I do, it's a lot more serious than I thought it was. If she doesn't snack or have enough protein in her body, she can pass out really easily. Especially because she's an athlete and how little she eats in general.

That's why I was so upset that day, she knew what she was doing to herself, but she had believed what Mark had said for so long. That's why I watch what she eats and try to make sure that she really does eat. It's a slow process but she's getting better, which is all that matters. And she's safe here."

We're quiet for a moment before Jane asks, "So why doesn't her family know?" 

Kea sighs, "She feels ashamed about what happened. Like she was too weak to get away from Mark, so she's afraid of what her parents are going to think. She tried to explain to Sam and Steph about why she needed to move but when she called them, Sam said she hated her for what she did and that she didn't want to talk to her." 

"Damn," Jane says.

I'm fuming. I have so many emotions rushing through me right now, I want to beat the shit out of him. 

"She just didn't turn him in? How could she do that?" I ask.

"Rachel, she's scared. I don't know why she didn't either but I'm not going to pressure her into doing something she doesn't want to." Kea says defensively.

She pauses before continuing. "She used to have anxiety when we were younger, she would get panic attacks, and sometimes they would get really bad. But as we got older she got better. I thought that her anxiety had stopped completely but before the game yesterday I saw her sitting against the wall with her head in between her legs, that was what she did when we were younger and was feeling anxious. That's why we went outside right before we walked onto the field. She told me that it had started getting bad again after Mark...." 

"I did see her take something before she sat down. I didn't know what it was but now, I feel like I could've helped or something..." 

Kea just shakes her head. "No one knows about her anxiety, well now only you two know, so I guess just if you see her like that or being really jittery, she's probably getting anxious. Just come get me."

"I hate him. I hate what he did. I hate how he's still controlling her life." Jane says quietly.

"H-how did no one not notice? Especially if it had been going on for months?" I didn't notice that I had started pacing until Jane grabs my arm to stop me. 

"She got really good at hiding it. She used makeup to cover the bruises she couldn't hide with clothes." 

"I just don't understand how the fuck this could happen? How the hell did she not say anything? Why didn't she leave him sooner?" 

"Hey," Justin speaks up, "Don't go blaming her for this. She left when she could. She did what she had to do to get out. Don't blame her when he's the one that should be paying for his actions." 

Kea rubs his back. I think we're all pretty shaken up by this. 

"Okay, so what do we do now? How do we go forward?" 


	14. Conversations

**Kristie's POV**

After kicking Rachel out, I tried to push last nights events from my mind. 

'Just pretend it didn't happen,' I told myself over and over again.

Because we had a game yesterday, we have today off. An entire day for ourselves. I look around my apartment and decide that maybe some cleaning will get my mind off things

I'm half way through the living room when my phone goes off. I ignore it. After it goes off a second time, I decide to check it. 

_From Sammy_

_I miss you Kratch... Please, can we talk?_

My hearts starts to beat really fast.

_To Sammy_

_I thought you hated me and wanted nothing to do with me. You said so yourself._

I don't know how to feel. She said some horrible things when she was upset. But I'm the one that made her that upset by leaving. So technically it is my fault....

_From Sammy_

_Kristie, I miss you. Please can you just call me?_

I don't open the message or bother responding. I can't deal with that right now, I've been too preoccupied with the fact that I made out with my teammate who also hates me but who has now basically seen me naked.

The rest of the day is uneventful. I lounge and watch Netflix, taking some "me time" to relax and recuperate. 

I accidentally skip lunch, too focused on my show. I think about what Kea said about taking care of my body and sigh. 

'She would be disappointed in me,' I tell myself. I decided that I better make some dinner or else I'll regret it at practice in the morning. The only problem is I don't have any groceries.

"Well looks like I'm going to the grocery store," I say to no one in particular. I grab my car keys, phone, wallet, and reusable bags and head to a store called HEB.

I have no idea what HEB stands for, but Kea told me to use this store if I need to buy things. When I park and see the size of the building, I get why Kea told me to shop there. This place is freaking huge. 

I probably spend an hour walking down each aisle, just strolling. For some reason, I feel like someone is watching me the entire time I'm there. I keep looking over my shoulder but I never see anyone.

By the time I go through the entire store, my cart is almost full. This is the most food I've bought since, well since I can remember. 

I quickly pay for my items and load my car. I'm looking all around for a pair of eyes that I feel on my back. I don't see anyone at all, 'Am I just paranoid?' I ask myself. 

I shake my head before getting in my car. When I get back to my apartment, I try to take all of my bags in on one trip because two trips are for the weak, duh.

When I'm shutting my trunk, I see Jane and Rachel pull into the parking lot. Not wanting to get stuck talking to either of them, I rush inside. 

As I'm putting my stuff away, my mind wanders to last night. My fingers touch my lips, thinking about the way hers felt on mine, and her hands, running down my body. 

I think back to her saying that the kiss was the hottest she'd ever had and smile to myself. 'Yeah, it was pretty hot,' I think. 

I'm confused as to why I'm feeling this way about the forward. We had been so nasty to each other and only said mean words to the other's face. I'm not sure when it changed or why, but I kind of like it....

'Geez Kristen, no! She's your teammate, you can't have a thing for her. Plus, she's a GIRL.' I shake my head. "Ugh" I let out, frustrated. 

I go to bed early that night after making dinner. I was hoping that my dreams would be the place I didn't think about her, oh I wish that were the case.

_I'm sitting on the couch, Rachel sitting next to me, our legs touching from how close we are. I turn and kiss her cheek. She pulls me onto her lap so I'm straddling her and grabs my face. The kiss is rough and passionate, I can feel herself pouring her emotions into it. Our tongues fight for dominance, she wins. _

_She stands up, still holding me. I wrap my legs around her waist and squeal. _

_"I've got you, baby," she says. She kicks open my bedroom door and gently sets me down on my bed. I scoot back, moving so I'm resting on my pillows. Rachel climbs on the bed, her eyes locked on mine. She slides my shirt up, exposing my stomach, kissing her way to my chest. _

_I reach down and just yank the damn thing off. She laughs. She kisses the swell of my breasts, just above the cups of my bra. "Rach," I say breathlessly. _

_"Hm?" she asks, still focused on my boobs. _

_"Please," I whine._

_"What baby? Tell me what you want." She's messing with me. She knows that what she's doing has this effect on my brain and words can never seem to come out. _

_I buck my hips up to hers, sending her the message. She smirks against my skin. _

_"Patience love," she says. I huff in reply._

_She peppers kisses from one side of my hip bone to the other. I'm squirming underneath her._

_She slowly pulls my sweatpants down along with my underwear, kissing down my thighs as she goes. I close my eyes, trying to take it all in. The feels of her lips on my skin, my heart rate speeding up, my shallow breathing. _

_I open my eyes when she stops. I see her looking at me. "What?" I ask, worried something is wrong._

_"You're just so beautiful. Especially right now, here, underneath me. I could never get tired of this view." She brings her lips back to my face and kisses me softly._

_I wrap my arms around her shoulders to pull her closer. One of her hands moves from my face to my stomach, then lower. I can feel her fingers-_

I wake up with a jolt, breathing heavily.

'What the actual fuck?' I think to myself. 

I reach over and check my phone, 6:30 in the morning. "Ugh," I say, falling back against my pillows. I'm wide awake and know that I won't be able to fall back asleep. 

I run my hands over my face. I decide to get out of bed and go to the gym, hoping that will help me cool off. 

When I get there, thankfully it's empty. I plug in my headphones and start running. 

I'm mad at myself for dreaming of her. I shouldn't even be thinking about her. I channel my anger into my workout, making the speed go higher on the treadmill.

My foot lands wrong and I slam down onto the machine.

"Fuck!" 

The emergency stop goes off and the machine slows down. I slowly get up and see a burn on my arm and my knee bleeding. 

"This is just not my fucking day," I mutter. I decide to call it quits and go back to my apartment to shower. it is now 7:45 and practice starts at 9 so I still have time to get ready. 

After showering and cleaning myself up, I eat some breakfast. Normally I'm not a big breakfast person, but today I was pretty hungry after my workout.

'Okay so at practice today, just don't look at Daly. That's all you have to do, stay away from her and it will all be good,' I tell myself. 

Of course, it wasn't that easy at practice. 

She tried to make small talk with me while we were on water breaks or during drills but I gave her the cold shoulder. I tried to put distance between us, switching partners whenever we got paired together. 

Being around her made me feel on fire. I couldn't stop thinking about our kiss, my dream, and her in general. I missed a shot on the goal because I wasn't focusing enough. I kept getting more frustrated with myself as practice went on.

During a water break, Kea came over with a worried look on her face. "You okay Kristie?" she asks.

I nod. "Yeah, I'm just a little out of it today I guess. I didn't sleep well last night and this morning I fucking fell while working out and got a little banged up." 

"We can have someone check it out if you want," she says.

I just shake my head. "No, I'm fine. I just need to focus." 

She nods. "Okay well, if you need to talk I'm here." she says with a soft smile. 

**Rachel's POV**

She had been ignoring me all day. Refusing to look at me or speak to me. She couldn't even be my passing partner for drills. 'Does she really regret it that much?' I think to myself.

Even though she's been giving me radio silence, I can't keep my eyes off of her. I'm just drawn to every little thing she does. Suddenly, I'm noticing little things about her. 

When she's trying to concentrate, she bites her lip and squints her eyes. When she's nervous, she tucks her hair behind her ears. How when she's talking to someone her hands instinctively go to her hips.

"Dude, you have to stop watching her like a hawk," I hear Jane say quietly to me.

"I know but I can't Janie. I can't stop thinking about her." 

She looks at me questionably. "Is this about what Kea told us?... "

"No, no. I mean sort of, but before then I was still a little into her. Hell, after that kiss I was all into her. But now, I just want to protect her, from like, everything. I barely even know the damn girl."

"Did you try talking to her?" she asks.

I nod. "Yeah, but she won't even look at me now." 

"Do you think it's because y'all, you know, kissed?" she whispers the last part because people are around.

I shrug my shoulders. "Maybe?" 

"You should try talking to her after practice or something." 

"Yeah, I think I will." 

Luckily the rest of practice goes by quickly and I don't have the free time to think about her. After Coach dismisses us, I see her hurry into the locker room. 

'Now's your chance,' I tell myself. I run after her, trying to catch up to her.

"Hey Kristen, can we talk?" She looks at me.

"What do you want?" she asks, not trying to hide how annoyed she is.

"Why have you been ignoring me?"

"I'm acting like I normally do at practices, we hate each other remember? You insult me, I insult you."

"Maybe I want that to change," I say nonchalantly.

"Just because we kissed, doesn't mean things are going to change. We agreed to pretend it didn't happen." 

"No Mewis, you agreed to pretending it never happened, I didn't say I wanted to do that."

Before she can respond, people start filing into the locker room. I look at her, expecting her to say something but when she doesn't, I shake my head and go to my locker. 

I don't bother looking at her as I get my bag and head to the car. I don't want to be in the same room as her right now.

I pull up Instagram on my phone as I wait for Jane to come out. I stop scrolling when I see a post from @ sammymewyy. I click on her profile and start scrolling down. There are so many pictures of Sam with Kristie, some with Steph too.

I've known Samantha Mewis for a little while, we have mutual friends and we've hung out a few times before. We're not close but we still get along just fine.

I immediately remember that neither of those girls in the picture I'm looking at are speaking with Kristie right now and my heart breaks. I can't image how the defender is feeling. Even after she tried to explain, they didn't want to hear what she had to say.

Now I'm furious at the girls. Before thinking twice, I do something I know might get me in a hell of a lot of trouble, make Mewis never speak to me again, make Jane and Kea mad at me, but in the moment, I was only thinking about how it could only help.


	15. Phone Calls

**Sam's POV  
**

I wasn't expecting a message from Rachel Daly today. I hadn't spoken to her in probably a year? Whenever was the last time we played each other.

But when she sent me a text saying "Call me, it's urgent." I got a weird feeling inside. I was at Steph's house. We'd been hanging out together more lately after Kristie left, leaning on each other, both so confused and hurt by my sister's actions. 

"I'll be right back," I told her.

I hit call on her contact and she picks up after the first ring.

_"Hey Sam."_

_"Uh hey Rachel, what's up?"_

_"We need to talk."_

_"Okay? I'm listening."_

_"Why aren't you fucking talking to your sister?"_

I scoff. _"Do you know what she freaking did? She left us, giving us a three day warning. She just left us, she wouldn't even let us take her to the airport. So no, I'm not talking to my sister." _My voice cracks at the end. I tell myself I need to be strong, I've cried enough over it.

Rachel is quiet for a minute before saying, _"What do you know about her boyfriend?"_

_"Mark? I mean they've been dating for almost a year now. He's a pretty cool guy. My parent's really like him. But I haven't seen him since Kristie left so I'm not sure how they're doing. I bet she didn't even tell him about the move."_

_"Sam, they broke up two weeks ago."_

_"What? They broke up?...Why didn't she say anything? Well I mean lately she hasn't been saying anything to me so I wouldn't expect any different. They probably broke up because of her move." _I roll my eyes. 

_"Did.... did he seem possessive or anything to you?" _

_"Possessive? No, he just seemed like a normal guy. I didn't really see them fight, they seemed happy. Why?"_

Rachel is quiet for a minute. _"Rachel, what's going on?"_

_"Sam, I need you to sit down okay? What I'm about to tell you, it-it isn't pretty."_

_"Rachel, you're scaring me."_

_"Okay, did Kristie start wearing different clothes in like January-ish? Did she start acting different?" _

_"I mean, she started wearing longer sleeves but I thought that was just because of the cold weather. And whenever we hung out she had more makeup on, but I thought that was because she was practicing or something. Actually, around that time we didn't see each other much, we were both so busy."_

_"Sam.... Mark was abusive. He was hitting her."_

My heart stops. _"W-what? No. No That can't be true. H__e couldn't have been. She would've said something. S-she would've told us." _

Rachel is silent. 

_"No, no. That can't be true Rachel, you're wrong." _

_"Sam, I'm sorry, but it's the truth. He had been...hitting her since January. She started planning the trade in February, trying to figure out a way to get out of the relationship because obviously he wouldn't let her leave. But she couldn't say anything to anyone because she was afraid of what Mark would do if he found out. That's why she told you that she was leaving so late Sammy, she couldn't let anyone know."_

_"B-but, what happened? I don't understand...."_

_"Apparently after the first time he hit her, he....threatened to kill her if she left....I guess one night she finally had enough and didn't care if he tried to kill her...... She told him she was leaving. She had been taking pictures of the bruises and scars he left on her body and she told him if he tried to follow her that she would turn the pictures into the police. He saw the proof she had so he didn't try to stop her. She left. Then three days later she got here, in Houston." _

I have no words. My brain isn't able to form sentences right now. 

_"I guess she tried to tell you when you were FaceTiming and Steph was there or something? I'm not really sure, that's what Kea said. At the time, she'd only told two people, Kealia and Julie. She told Kealia when she got to Houston. And then Kristie tried to hide it but Julie could tell she was lying and forced it out of her. Then she finally got up the courage and wanted to tell you guys next. She wanted to apologize for leaving but she had to do what was best for her. She was scared Sam. So scared. Hell, she still is. She's wearing long clothes to hide the bruises she still has...._ _I guess he was mentally abusive too? Kea said he would talk about her weight and how she was fat, making her watch what she was eating AND what she was wearing....She hadn't been eating enough. She still isn't eating enough_ _. And she's hypoglycemic too? _

_"Y-yeah I know she has hypoglycemia, she's usually really good about watching it."_

_"Well when she was staying with Kealia, Kea noticed that she wasn't really eating a lot. The first few days Kea could watch what she was eating, making sure she was getting enough. But then she got her own apartment. She passed out on the pitch a few days ago because she hadn't eaten a single thing in almost an entire day. Kealia didn't know Kristie was hypoglycemic, I mean none of us did. So when she found out she kind of freaked out. _ _Mark got in her head. Hell, Mark is still in her head. It's a constant battle she's facing Sam, and she really fucking needs her sister. So you need to get your shit together and be there for her okay? Or else I will personally fly to where ever the hell you are and drag you back to Houston." _

_"O-okay. I can do that....How did I not see this? How could she not tell me?" _My voice cracks,

_"I don't know Sammy. She didn't tell anyone." _

_"Okay. Okay. Thank you for telling me Rachel. I still can't believe she never said anything....."_

_"Don't be too hard on her okay? She's having a rough time as it it."_

_"Should I tell Steph? I mean, we both were pretty nasty to her...."_

_"That's up to you. I have to go now, I'll talk to you later though okay? I'll try and keep you updated."_

_"Thank you, so much Rachel. I really don't know how to thank you."_

_"Just be there for her okay?" _

_"I can do that."_

_"Good. Bye Sam."_

She ends the call and I just stand there, leaning against the wall. My brain isn't working right because I can't formulate a single thought. 

"Sammy, you okay?" I turn around and see Steph poking her head around the corner. "What's wrong?" she asks concerned. I hadn't realized I was crying until I felt a tear fall from my cheek.

"Steph....we messed up." Her face immediately falls. 

"What?" She has a confused look on her face. 

"I-I know why Kristie left..." I trail off at the end, unsure of how to start this conversation.

"She left because she wanted a change or whatever," she says, rolling her eyes. 

"No," I say, shaking my head. "Why don't we sit down?" I lead her over to the couch. 

"So, I don't know how to say this so I'm just going to say it. Mark was abusing Kristie," my voice cracks at the end and my eyes fill with tears. This time I don't try to hide it.

"W-what?"

"That's why she left."

"W-what? No, that can't be true Sam. She would've said something. She would've gotten help. She would've told us." She shakes her head no. 

"I don't know how long it was going on, Rachel said around January. Remember how I said she was always so busy and working too hard? I think that's when it started happening...."

"Rachel can't be right. S-she's wrong. No." 

I shake my head no. 

"Why didn't she leave? She should have left him right away!" Steph is starting to cry, so I wrap my arm around her shoulder. 

"He said he would hurt her if she left...She didn't really have another option. But she was taking pictures of everything he did, so when the time was right she could leave him. Apparently it got so bad one night she didn't care if....if he killed her, she just wanted to leave. He was mentally abusing her too...He said things about her weight too. That's why she that lost weight. I thought she had just been working out more, remember? When I asked she just said she was training more, so I didn't give it much thought after that. Apparently she hadn't been eating enough since she moved. She ended up passing out during practice." 

Steph shakes her head. "No, no. It doesn't make sense Sam." 

"Do you remember when we couldn't get ahold of her for like three days and she finally sent us a message saying she had just been sick and sleeping? She had just left him I think, that's why she didn't want anyone to see her. I think he beat her up pretty bad....and then she said she was leaving. She had been planning the trade for a few weeks. She couldn't tell us because she was afraid Mark would find out." 

"How did we not catch it?" her voice breaks at the end. "Were we so blind to not see her suffering right in front of us?" I shake my head slowly, not knowing what to say.

By now we're both crying. Not the tears-roll-down-your-cheek kind, the snot-running-eyes-swollen-from-crying-so-hard kind. 

"So when she tried to FaceTime us and she said she wanted to talk, do you think she was going to tell us then?" 

I nod my head, "Yeah, I think she was trying to tell us."

"We were so mean to her," Steph collapses in my arms, bawling. I know I'm doing the same, we're both leaning on each other, both heart broken for Kristie. We sit there crying for a few more minutes, neither of us bother to wipe our tears. 

"Okay, okay. So what do we do now?" Steph asks, sitting up, a determined look in her eye. 

"I think, right now, we need to just be there for her...."

"Oh god." Steph puts her head in her hands. "I want to run him over with my car Sam, I want to hurt him so bad. He broke her, he BROKE her!" She stands up suddenly. 

"No, no, no. You can not go to him Steph!" I grab her arm to stop her. 

"Why not Sam?!" She yells. 

"Because. We have to check on Kristie first, we weren't there for her when she needed us, we need to be there for her now." 

**Rachel's POV**

"Who was that?" Jane asks as I hang up the phone.

I turn around quickly, not expecting her to be there. "Uh, no one. It's not important." 

She just raises her eyebrows questioningly. Thankfully she doesn't push me any further. "Sorry I took so long, I got caught up talking to Nichelle," she says, opening the car door.

"It's all good. Are we having girls night tonight?" I ask, starting the car. 

She nods and we head back to our apartment.


	16. Visitor

**Kristie's POV**

After Rachel walks away from me, I can't help but think about what she said. Does she mean that she didn't want to act like we didn't kiss? So she liked it? Does she want to kiss again? I don't know what she means.

As I'm grabbing my bag from my locker, I feel someone come stand behind me. "I'm fine Kea, I don't want to talk about it," I say, expecting it to be my best friend.

"I never asked if you wanted to talk about it," a voice says that I immediately recognize as Jane. 

I sigh looking up, "Sorry, I thought you were Kea." 

She nods. "Are you doing anything later? I think a few of us are going to get together to watch a movie or something." 

I shake my head. "Nah, I think I'm okay. I need to do some stuff at home." I lie through my teeth. If Jane can tell, she doesn't say anything. 

"The offer still stands if you decide to change your mind later," she says as she walks away. 

I need to go home and think about what's going on in my head. Daly is consuming my thoughts and I need that to stop. I know that I shouldn't like her, I know she treated me like shit, I know she's my teammate. 

But I can also feel myself starting to feel this attraction. Being around her, the way she makes me feel, the way she kisses... I shake my head, ridding myself of that thought.

'Stop thinking about her.' I tell myself. 

I get my stuff and head to my car, wanting to be back in the comfort in my own home. 

When I get to the apartment, I walk inside. I can see Jane and Rachel in front of me, walking down the hall to their apartment at the very end. I freeze, not wanting them to hear me and turn around. When I see Jane open the door and both of them walk in, I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. 

Inside my apartment, I set my stuff down on the table by my door and kick off my shoes. Humming to myself, I walk into my kitchen. I go to open the fridge and I hear Mark's voice in my head telling me that I'm overweight. I freeze. 'No,' I think to myself. 'I am healthy and active, Mark does not control me and what I do.' It takes me a second to process my thoughts and reassure myself but when I open the fridge I feel victorious. I know it was just something little, but it means something bigger to me.

I decided to make stir fry for dinner. I'd cooked it before so I knew it was pretty easy and healthy. When I finish eating I put my dishes in the sink. That's one of the bad parts of living alone, you cook, you clean. I'm about to turn the sink on when I hear my phone go off on the counter. I set the dishes down and walk over to pick it up.

_From Sammy_

_Can we talk, please? Why didn't you tell me you broke up with Mark? Why didn't you tell us what happened, what he did... You could've told us, Kristie, we would've helped you. _

I freeze. My heart starts beating faster. I didn't tell Sam what happened. Someone else must've told her then.... I try to remember who all I've told. The list is short: Kealia, Julie, and Justin who knows from Kea. So it must have been one of them.

I'm mad now. I trusted them. I felt safe enough to tell them the truth. And one of them has now broken my trust. My phone goes off again.

_From Sammy_

_Please call me Kristie. I miss you so much. I'm not mad, I just want to hear your voice. I'll listen, I won't ask questions. _

I ignore her message, too upset to respond. I'm not mad at her. I'm mad at myself for trusting someone who went against my wishes. 

I decide that it had to be Kealia. She's been in Sam's life for as long as she's been in mine so it makes the most sense that Kea would be the one to tell her. 

I'm hurt and I feel lied to, deceived, and then angry. I decide to text the person I thought I could trust stabbed me in the back.

_To Kealia_

_I really thought I could trust you Kea, I came to you because I felt safe with you. I wasn't ready to tell Sam, especially after what she said to me on the phone, you knew how that hurt me. How could you go behind my back and tell her? _

I throw my phone down on the counter and put my head in my hands frustrated. 

My phone goes off and I know that Kea replied. I decide to ignore it. It buzzes again. A few seconds later, it rings. 

_Incoming call from Kea_

I shut my phone off completely, not wanting to talk to her or anyone else. I decide that maybe a shower will help me cool down. 

While I'm washing my hair I try to figure out what I'm going to say to Sam. I know that I need to tell her what happened, she's my sister. But I don't want her to think I'm weak, that I couldn't protect myself. I feel conflicted. 'Should I even explain myself to her? Does she deserve that?' Then I remember how hurt she was when I left. Her face full of heartache. I sigh, thinking of all the pain I caused her. 

The water suddenly turns cold and I know it's time for me to get out. I dry off and see that my clock by my bed says nine-thirty and I decide to go to bed early. I think about turning my phone on and calling Sam but decide to do that tomorrow, plus I don't want to talk to Kealia. I'm getting in my pj's when I hear a knock at my door.

"Just a sec!" I yell.

Assuming it's one of the girls, I open it without checking the peephole.

"Hey, I'm really not in the mood-"

My heart stops. Mark is here. At my door. In Houston.

"Hey baby," he says calmly.

"Um-uh Mark, wh-what are you doing here?" I feel like a deer trapped in headlights. I can feel my breathing become faster, my heart starting to race. 

"I missed you," he tries to come inside but I'm standing my ground, blocking the door.

"I'm sorry but you can't come in. You can't be here. I don't want you here." I try to sound firm and strong. I'm putting on a front and he knows it as well. 

"You don't mean that," he looks at me pleadingly.

"Yes, I do. Now leave before I call the cops."

His face becomes angry. "Kristen, I flew all the way to see you, now let me in."

He's getting louder and I don't want to cause a scene. I hesitantly open the door. He kisses my cheek as he walks in, I flinch out of instinct.

I shut the door slowly behind him, trying to think of some kind of plan. 'Fuck', I just remembered that I left my phone off, sitting on my nightstand. 'Stay calm, stay calm.' I tell myself.

When I turn around, he's waiting for me to say something. I hug myself protectively. 

He reaches for my face and I close my eyes. "Your bruises are almost gone," he says quietly, lightly holding my chin. I don't say anything.

"I'm sorry baby, I am so sorry." I step back, out of his grasp.

"I don't want you here Mark. We broke up for a reason. You need to leave, now." I try to sound firm but my voice waivers at the end. 

He takes a step back, running his hands through his hair. "Kristie, I told you it was a mistake. I promised that it wouldn't happen again. You broke my heart by leaving me...Please give me another chance." 

I try to step around him but he reaches for me. When his hands grab my arms I'm immediately flooded with unwanted memories. "Let go of me," I say through clenched teeth. 

He doesn't take his hands off my arms so I yank them from him and head towards the kitchen, trying to put the counter and myself between him. "I do not want you here Mark. I do not want you back. I want you to leave my apartment. Now." I try to be as clear as I can be so he gets the picture. My fists are clenched on the counter and I remind myself to just breathe. 

He's silent for a few seconds. "Why didn't you tell me you were moving to Texas?" he says in a low tone that I know all too well. The voice he uses when he's mad, the voice he uses when he is trying to be controlling. The voice that usually leads to....

"We were broken up, you didn't need to know." 

"Why'd you do it, Kristie? Why'd you move halfway across the country without telling me? Don't you think I should've known?" Mark's voice is getting louder as he goes on. "You didn't even want to give us a second chance."

"I left because of you! I wanted to get away from you Mark! I left my family, my friends, my home, because of you," I let out with a sob. My tears are partly for sadness, but also for anger. 

He's standing by the couch and reaches for the lamp on the end table, messing with the shade. I hold my breath, knowing what is coming. "Me?... You left because of me huh?" I don't say anything. He looks at me with a fire in his eyes. He grabs the lamp and I close my eyes, I don't need to see what is coming. 

I hear my lamp crash on my floor, jumping out of instinct. When I open my eyes, he's glaring at me. "You need to leave," I say again, my voice firm. 

"Oh baby, I'm not going anywhere."


	17. Neighbors

**Rachel's POV **

My stomach hurts from laughing so much. Some of the girls are at our apartment and we're watching a movie, eating pizza, just hanging out.

Amber wanted to watch Someone Great and none of us had seen it so we decide to put it on. My phone rings in the kitchen and I untangle myself from the mesh of bodies on the couch to get up to go answer it.

_Incoming call from Kealia_

I hit accept.

_"Hey babe what's up?"_

_"Hey, I know y'all are having your girls night and sorry to interrupt but is Kristie there?"_

_"Uh, no. She didn't want to come over."_

_"Dang it. She sent me a really weird text message and then hasn't been answering her phone. She texted me at like nine-ish but hasn't responded since and it's already 11:30."_

_"What did she say?" _I ask.

_"She said that I broke her trust, that I told Sam about what happened and how she was upset that I did that even when she asked me not to. But I didn't say anything Rach, I would never do that to her." _Her voice cracks at the end so I know that she's almost in tears over this.

I'm silent. _"I just don't know what to do. I tried to call her but she didn't answer so I called again and then it went straight to voicemail."_

I hesitate, _"Kea, uh I have to tell you something but you have to promise not to get mad okay?"_

I leave the kitchen and go into my room for some privacy, shutting my door.

_"What did you do Rachel?"_

_"I uh- I'm the one that told Sam..."_

_"You did WHAT? Rachel, what the actual HELL? How COULD you? You aren't even supposed to know!"_

_"I know, I know Kea, but she was hurting so bad and I couldn't stand to see her that upset." _ I bite my nails nervously, a habit I know I need to quit but haven't been able to.

_"Rachel that wasn't your call to make! She wasn't ready to tell Sam! And you just took that away from her!"_

I don't really have an explanation for my actions._ "I thought at the time it was a good idea, I just didn't like to see her hurting so much. I just...I don't know Kea, I thought it would help."_

_"Okay, will you go check on her at least? I don't want her to do anything stupid."_

_"Really Kea? It's almost 11:30, I'm sure she's just asleep or something."_

_"Rachel Ann Daly the least you could do is go check on her after everything you did."_

_"Yeah, yeah okay I'll go check on her. Do you want to stay on the phone with me or do you want me to just call you back after I talk to her?"_

_"I'll stay on the phone with you."_

_"Okay, let me just get my shoes on."_

I walk out of my room and Jane looks at me.

"I need to go down the hall real quick." She raises her eyebrows.

I shake my head, meaning I'll tell you later. She nods, getting my message. I don't bother shutting our door, I know that I won't be long.

_"Okay, walking down the hall."_

When I get to her door, I see that it isn't closed all the way. _"_Huh, that's weird," I say.

_"What's weird?"_ she says worriedly.

I open the door the rest the way open slowly, "Kristie?"

Her apartment is trashed. There's glass on the floor, the couch is on its side. 'What the fuck happened Mewis?' I think to myself

_"Kea... something isn't right. Her place is fucking trashed."_

_"What do you mean? Rachel?"_

_"_Kristie? Are you in here?" I yell walking down the hallway. I don't see her in the living room or kitchen area.

_"Rachel, what's going on?"_

_"There's glass all over the floor. Her place is a mess. It looks like there was a fight or something."_

_"Oh shit. Oh no, okay. I need to leave. Do you see her at all?"_ I can hear her voice get higher.

When I walk in her room I see her.

_"Kealia, call an ambulance, quick."_

I drop my phone and run over to her. She's laying on the face down on the ground, and it looks like she's unconscious.

"Kristie!" When I roll her over I see her face.

"Oh god," she's got a black eye, a busted lip, and bruises on her neck. I try shaking her but she doesn't wake up.

I look around her room, looking for anything that would help me out in the situation. Her room is even more trashed than the rest of her apartment. 

"JANE!" I'm trying to yell as loudly as I can. I don't want to leave her but I need someone else to help me.

I hear running down the hall, "Rachel? Are you- oh shit, oh fuck, what the hell happened? Rach, where are you?"

"In here!" She runs into the room and freezes when she sees me.

"Oh fuck, oh fuck. Okay did you call an ambulance?"

I nod, I can't seem to speak. I hear other people come into her apartment but I can't tell who it is, I'm too focused on the girl in front of me.

"S-should we move her? I don't know what to do Jane, what should I do?"

"Okay, okay, it's going to be okay," she says calmly. "If you called an ambulance, then we shouldn't move her and let them do that."

I'm not sure how much time passes, it could be five minutes or five hours but I hear Kealia running into the apartment. I'm holding Kristie's head in my lap, my eyes are scanning every inch of her face. I brush the hair out of her face softly, trying to steer clear of the gash and already forming bruises. 

"Oh god, where is she? Where is she?" 

"We're in here!" Jane yells.

Kea runs in with tears running down her cheeks, the paramedics following her.

"Step back ma'am," the EMT says.

Jane has to physically pull me away from Kristie so they can work.

"Can someone go with you?" Jane asks her voice calm. The paramedic shakes his head. "Not in this case."

"Not in this case? What does that mean?!" Kea is yelling now, I go to grab her arm. The paramedic gives us a grim look. As they're lifting her onto the stretcher, Kea breaks down completely. I catch her just in time so she doesn't hit the ground.

"Kea, Kea. Come on. We have to follow them okay?" I try shaking my best friend who is falling apart right in front of me.

I look at Jane before asking, "Can you drive?" She nods her head and grabs Kealia's keys out of her hands. I stand her up and start trying to pull her out of the bedroom and towards the front door.

I'm immediately met with worried faces. I had forgotten about the girls in my apartment in the rush of things. "Fuck," I whisper. I don't know what to say to them or how to explain 

"Go, we'll clean up here," Amber says, pushing us out the door. I only nod, not able to formulate a sentence. Jane runs in front of us, going to get the car. "Kealia, I need you to walk because I can not carry you," I say looking into her eyes.

"I-I don't k-know how this h-happened," she sobs. "She was supposed to be s-safe here." I reach for my best friend, holding her to me as I walk down the hallway and out the door. "She's going to be okay," I say rubbing her back. I keep telling myself that in my head as well, trying to believe the words. 

Jane pulls up in the car and we get in. Kea is still crying in the backseat when Jane quietly asks me, "Who do you think did this?" I shake my head, "I have no fucking clue."

She pauses before saying, "Do you think it was him...?" She doesn't need to specify who 'him' is, I know that she means Mark. I rub my face with both of my hands, "That would mean that he somehow found out where she is living and then got into her apartment. I don't think she would have let him in, right?" I ask.

She doesn't say anything back. I reach for my phone only to find that I left it in Kristen's apartment. "Shit," I say, my head falling back against the headrest. 

"What?" 

"I forgot my phone at her apartment." 

"Here, you can use mine to text Amber or someone. Maybe they can bring it to you." Jane hands me her phone.

_To Ambzz_

_Hey, it's Rachel. I accidentally left my phone in Kristie's room. Do you think someone could bring it to me pls? _

_From Ambzz_

_Yeah, definitely! What hospital are you guys going to? I think we all might come and stay with y'all... I think someone must have said something because everyone on the team knows. _

"Fuck, the entire team knows now," I say with a sigh. 

"I mean, I don't think she could keep this a secret Rach. Also, why shouldn't the team know? We all care about her and will want to be there for her." Jane says with a shrug.

"I just feel like Kristie wouldn't want people to know, ya know? She's so private...plus no one else knows about Mark so I just kind of figured...." 

"I mean, what's the harm in them coming to wait with us?" 

"True."

_To Ambzz_

_They are taking her to Memorial Herman. We'll probably be in the waiting room, if not we'll let you know. _

I give Jane back her phone as we pull into the Memorial Herman Emergency Room parking lot. We quickly get out of the car and rush inside. 


	18. Waiting

**Rachel's POV**

We've been waiting for what feels like hours, but it could've been only minutes. Kealia called Justin from the waiting room, but she could barely get out one sentence so I ended up taking the phone from her. I told him that we were at the hospital with Kristie. He said he would be right there. 

I look over and see one of my best friends falling apart and the other one completely silent, looking at the ground. The doors open and Justin comes walking in. "I got here as fast as I could," he says breathlessly. Kea runs into his arms and I can hear her crying.

Jane hasn't said anything since we got here, but neither have I. My legs have been fidgeting so I decide to stand up and maybe get some of the beans out of my system. 

The automatic doors open again and I turn around to see the rest of the team rush in. Everyone has a concerned look on their face, worried about our new teammate. It's crazy to think that Mewis hasn't even been here for two weeks and she's already a part of our tribe. 

Amber comes to me with a concerned look on her face and hands me my phone, "Rach, what the hell happened?" 

"I-I don't fucking know. Her door was open when I got to her apartment and it was trashed. I found her in her room, and I yelled for Jane and when she came running in, she called 911." I leave out the fact that Kealia was actually the one to call 911. I don't want to have to explain why I had to go check on her in the first place: that I told Kristen's sister the real reason why she left town. 

"We tried to clean up her place the best we could, but it's not looking too pretty." She says with a sad face. 

I nod, "That's okay, thank you for doing that, and thanks for coming," I pull her into a hug.

"Of course, we're a family and we stick together."

We walk over to the seats where everyone is sitting. I look around and see the entire team here, we are taking up almost the entire waiting room. I'm thinking about Kristie's family. Not us, her real family. I sit down next to Kealia, Justin on her other side. "Do you think we should tell her family....?" I ask hesitantly. 

Kea's eyes jump to mine. I can't tell what she's thinking: I know that she's mad at me for telling Sam but I feel like she wants to let her family know too. "I want to respect her privacy, but I want to tell Sam and her parents. But...I mean she was so mad when she found out Sam knew," she glares at me, "so I don't think we should tell them yet. Let's wait until she can decide." 

I want to fight her on this, but I know that she's right. I also know I need to tell her why I told Sam. "Kea, I'm sorry that Kristie blamed you for telling Sam and I'm sorry that she's mad at you. But I'm not sorry I told Sam, I mean, her own damn family doesn't know what happened and she needs them to support her."

"Rachel, you barely even know Kristie. I've known her for years, I've known her family for years too. Don't you think I wanted to tell them? I wanted to call them right after she told me, but Kristie wasn't ready. She still isn't and you took that away from her." 

I sigh, "I know, I was just so mad at Sam." 

Kea doesn't say anything for a few seconds. "Right now we just need to be there for her."

Justin speaks for the first time since I sat down. "Does anyone know what happened or who did this?" I shake my head. "I mean, I don't want to assume anything but my first thought was Mark," I say. 

Kea looks at Justin, thinking. "I really doubt it was a break-in because one: that's weird that only her apartment was broken into, two: if Kristie would've put up a fight, they probably would have left," she pauses, "Mark might've found out about Kristie's move through people, plus the game was on TV. So I'm sure it wasn't too difficult to figure out where she was." 

Justin stands up, "I'm going to go back to her apartment and see if anything is there. Maybe a camera in the hallway or something might've caught who did it," he leans down to kiss Kea and I look away. I don't want to intrude on their moment. When he walks away, I hear her softly say "He's protective of her, even in the short amount of time she's been here. He thinks of her like a little sister," she has a small smile on her face watching him walk away. 

She turns to look at me. "I've been thinking.....where is this sudden care for Kristen coming from? When she got here you absolutely hated her, and continued to hate her until a few days ago." 

Before I can answer I hear "Family of Kristen Mewis" being called from a nurse with a clipboard. Kea and I jump up, the rest of the team does as well. The nurse seems to be overwhelmed with the number of people surrounding her and takes a step back. Kea is the one to speak, "That's us."

The lady looks down at her clipboard before speaking again. "So first, she is still unconscious but only because we sedated her for surgery-"

"Surgery? What?" Jane interrupts. 

The nurse, who's badge says Mary, looks annoyed by the interruption. "We found a few broken ribs, a fracture to her wrist and she had a nasty cut on her face that needed stitches. She had some internal bleeding which is where the surgery part comes in. The doctor should be finishing up soon. You'll be able to see her then." 

"Thank you," I say. She nods and walks off. For an entire team of girls, this is the quietest I've ever heard them. We all know this means Kristie will be out for a while. I look to my captain, my best friend, hoping she will have something to say, to lead us in this horrible time. 

Kealia clears her throat, her voice wavering. "Since it seems like she might be here for a little while and it's already," she looks down at her watch, "almost one, why don't you guys go ahead and head home. I'll keep you updated and I'll text Coach and let him know what's going on." 

A few of the girls look at each other, no one moves. "I think I speak for all of us when I say that we're not going anywhere," Amber says with a determined voice. A few people mutter "yeah" and others nod their head. Kea's eyes begin to water and she only nods. I can tell she feels the overwhelming love and support for this girl that we are all calling family. I put my arm around her, "She's going to be okay," I tell her softly. 

We all sit back down, waiting until they say we can go see her. Jane, who had barely spoken a word leans over. "Should we get the police involved? Maybe report this?" I know what I want to say, but I look at Kealia. She thinks for a second, "I feel like we should wait and let her decide that." 

I want to protest, but she holds her hand up, telling me to drop it. Her phone starts to ring before I can say anything. "It's Justin," she says standing up. She walks to the other side of the room for more privacy. I can only hear parts of the conversation as she bites her lip nervously. 

"Okay...Did you see-...Uh-huh...Can you get a copy of the video?.... Yeah, you can just bring it here, we're still waiting. They gave us an update and it's bad Justin," her voice cracks at the end. She nods again, looking over at me and Jane. "Okay, see you soon. Drive safe, I love you." She ends the call and looks at the phone in her hand. She closes her eyes and takes a moment before walking back over to us.

"They got a video of the person," she says quietly. "Justin doesn't know what Mark looks like so he's going to send me a picture of the man." I sit back against the chair, letting out a big breath. Jane raises her eyebrows, the weight of this seems to be riding on one message. 

We're all staring down at her phone nervously, on edge. "The family of Kristen Mewis can see her now," I look up and see Nurse Mary waiting for us to follow her back, just as Kealia says "He sent the picture." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello loves! I probably should've done this sooner but better late than never right?
> 
> What do you guys think so far? Likes, dislikes? Anything you want to see more of?
> 
> I know it started kind of slow but I didn't want to just jump right in.... It'll pick up soon!


	19. Overnight Stay

**Kristie's POV**

I hear the same beeping over and over again. It's annoying. I try to reach for my alarm clock to turn it off but I can't seem to lift my arm. I feel the weight of my limbs anchoring me. They are unusually heavy. 

My bed doesn't feel the same, the sheets are rough on my skin. My room doesn't smell like the vanilla air freshener I have either. It actually smells like....cleaning supplies or disinfectant. I try to open my eyes but my eyelids feel like bricks. I don't fight it and let my tiredness pull me to sleep...

My arm itches. I open my eyes to see what the culprit is and am met with bright lights, too bright. I close my eyes again tightly, the sunlight blinding me. Now I know that I'm not in my room because I have blinds to prevent such things from happening. I take account into account how I'm feeling. My ribs burn when I breathe in and out. My wrist feels uncomfortable like something is on it. My neck feels sore and my face hurts when I crinkle my eyes. I hear something shift in my room and someone murmur something I can't hear. Everything fades into the darkness again...

I hear a door open and shut loudly, with someone saying "I'll come back later." I don't recognize the voice. This time I force myself to open my eyes and keep them open. 'We're definitely not in my room anymore Toto' I think to myself. 

I'm in a hospital room, a pretty nice one if I do say so. I look around the room and see three sleeping bodies. Kealia is laying down on a couch, her head in Justin's lap as he leans his head against the wall. I'm surprised to see Rachel Daly asleep in a plastic chair leaning against the wall, she's snoring softly. When I get to Jane, I see her looking back at me. I jump, not expecting her to be awake. 

She gets up quietly, trying not to wake the others. "Hey," she says softly walking over to the side of my bed. I try to reply but it comes out as a croak. I reach for my throat, surprised by the sound. "Let me get you some water." 

She grabs a pitcher of water and pours me a glass of water. I nod my head in thanks as she hands it to me with a straw. I didn't realize how parched I was until I feel the cool water in my mouth. She sits on the edge of my bed, looking at me. She waits a moment before speaking. 

"We know who did this Kristie... There's a video of him walking into the apartment building." 

I freeze. I hadn't actually thought about what happened or how I ended up where I was currently. I know my heart rate started to pick up because I can hear it on the heart rate monitor. My hands start to get clammy. 

"Shit, shit. Um okay, breathe Kristie, deep breaths." She puts her hands on my shoulders. The commotion wakes up Kealia because the next thing I know she comes behind Jane, lightly moving her out of the way. 

She sits down on the bed in front of me and takes my hands, putting them on her face. She takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. Feeling her breath like that helps me focus on doing the same. We do this a few times before the beeping on the machine slows down. 

When I nod my head signaling I'm okay she takes my hands off her face but holds them in her lap. She has a sad look in her eyes sitting across from me and I hate the way it's making me feel. I can't hold her eye contact and look down, tears filling my eyes. "Oh Kristie," I hear her say softly before pulling me into a hug. 

For the first time since I've left Chicago, I let someone hold me and I let myself really let it all out. She rubs my back soothingly, not caring that I'm getting her shirt soaked with my tears. "You're okay, you're okay," I hear over and over. But I don't feel okay. I feel tired and broken and ashamed. 

I pull away from her, "I-I'm sorry," I say, wiping the tears off my face. I tell myself to pull it together. She shakes her head, "No, don't be." 

Justin stands up and walks over, he gives me a gentle hug. "How ya doing kid?" I chuckle at the nickname and shrug my shoulders. "Can I get you anything?" My stomach growls loudly and I can't help but blush, embarrassed. He laughs, "Food, I can do that. Panera okay?" 

"You don't have to do that-"

"Well I am and you can't stop me."

"Justin-"

"Children, please." Kea holds up her hands, exasperated. She looks at me, "You will let him get you food, no arguing," with a no-nonsense tone before turning to him and saying "Can you get me something too, please?" in a completely different tone of voice. I roll my eyes but smile. 

"Of course," he says, smiling at his girlfriend. "Anyone else want anything?" 

I had totally forgotten about Rachel being in the room until she says "No thank you," while Jane says "I'll go with you." He nods and they walk out together as Kea yells "I'll text you our order!" 

I look at Rachel and see her watching me. I suddenly am very self-aware that I am in a hospital gown and don't even want to know what I look like. I'm the first one to look away and I can still feel her eyes burning a hole in my head. We're silent for a few minutes, no one really knowing what to say first or how to say the things that need to be said. 

Luckily I'm saved from any prying questions when a doctor walks in. "Hi Kristen, I'm glad to see you're awake. I'm Dr. Hansen, I'll be taking care of you while you're here." She looks down at a clipboard. "I have a few questions I'd like to ask," she glances at Kealia and Rachel. 

"They can stay," I say without giving it a second thought. She nods and I grab Kea's hand, nervous for what is about to come. Rachel comes to stand by the bed as well. "So you had some internal bleeding which we went in a took care of with surgery. Luckily there wasn't too much blood and you didn't need a transfusion. We did find a few broken ribs. One looked newly broken and another looked like it had been broken for a while now. Did you know?"

"W-well I mean I didn't know that it was broken. I knew that it hurt but I just pushed through it. I didn't think it was broken." 

"It looked like it had been about a month old. Did you not go to the doctor to get it looked at? I'm sure you would've need pain meds to walk let alone do anything else." 

I shake my head, looking down at my hands. "A month?" Kea asks, shocked. "Kristie, why didn't you tell us that your rib was hurting? You shouldn't have been practicing let alone playing a game with an injury like that." I don't know what to say so I don't say anything.

"That's why you looked like you were in so much pain when I kicked the ball into your stomach that day at practice," Rachel says quietly. 

"I couldn't go to the doctor so I just took Advil. I didn't want to miss practice or anything because I was trying to secure my trade to the Dash and I couldn't _not play_. Then when I got to Houston I-I needed to prove myself. So I've just been playing through it." 

"We'll give you some pain medicine to take home but no more practicing or playing games for a while until both of the breaks are healed properly. The fracture on your wrist will only need a cast for a few weeks luckily. And the stitches on the side of your face will need to come out in two weeks." At the mention of my face, I reach up to find the stitches. It stings when I touch them so I don't linger for long. 

"Now, I know from the signs what happened here," she looks at me with pity. "You have two options really: you can report whoever did this and they can go to jail, or you can choose not to report them. If you do choose the first option, we'll send over our medical records as evidence." 

I shake my head, "No."

Kealia whips her head around to look at me. "No? Kristie, there's a video of him walking into the apartment complex. With that and this, we have the proof we need. You would only have to tell your side of the story and then he'd go to jail. There's no doubt about it."

I shake my head again. "No." The doctor looks at me with raised eyebrows. "I can't force you to do anything, I can only suggest but I highly suggest you do report this, as it seems this wasn't the first time this had happened." She looks at me with pity.

"I said no. I am not going to argue about this, I have made my decision." Kea gets up from sitting next to me and walks to the other side of the room, keeping her back to me. I look back at the doctor, wanting her to finish and then leave.

"The last thing is that you will need to stay here overnight just so we can keep an eye on you and make sure you are healing properly." I nod my head. "If you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask."

"Thank you," I say as she walks out the door. Kea is still facing the wall and I look at Rachel who just gives me a sympathetic look. No one says anything for a moment before I hear another knock at the door. "Come in."

Amber pokes her head through the door and smiles when she sees that I'm awake. "Are you up for some visitors?" I tilt my head confused until she opens the door the rest of the way. The entire team is standing behind her. Some holding flowers, some holding balloons, and one person holding a teddy bear.

I freeze. I wasn't expecting the entire team to be here. I don't know whether to be embarrassed or grateful for their support. Amber hesitates when she sees my face. I decided that I should be grateful and smile. When she sees me relax she walks in, followed by the rest of the team.

My room is a decent size but with all of them in here it's a little tight. "Hi guys," I say awkwardly. They set the flowers on the table by the window and tie the balloons to the bottom of my bed. I'm handed the teddy bear and I laugh, "Guys I'm okay really, all of this wasn't necessary....but thank you though."

"We were really worried about you there Mewis...." Sofia says. I don't know what to say, I've never been good with attention on me and this is a little much.

"Well thank you guys for coming to check on me. I'm sorry that you had to wait up, I know that it's pretty late and you're all probably tired-"

Amber grabs my hand, "Kristen, it's okay, we all wanted to be here." I swallow and nod slowly.

It's quiet before Nichelle asks "So what the hell happened?" her voice isn't malicious, just curious. My eyes widen. I see Bi elbow her and give her a death glare. "Ow," she says rubbing her arm.

I know that I need some kind of explanation for these recent events. I could tell them the truth, it wouldn't be that bad honestly, right? 'No' I tell myself. I'm not dragging anyone else into this.

"U-um I actually don't remember. The doctor said I hit my head when I fell, so I'm not really sure...." I try to sound believable. It must work because no one questions me. I hear a few "oh no's" and one "oh my gosh". I'm starting to feel uncomfortable and I'm starting to get anxious with the questions. I'm not sure when Kea turned back around but I hear her say "The doctor said she needs to stay here tonight so I'm going to stay here." I think this is her way to say that it's time for them to leave and they get the picture.

Everyone says goodbye, saying feel better, more encouraging words before filing out. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding as the last person leaves. I fall back into the pillows behind me and close my eyes. I hear Rachel sigh and I don't need to see that she and Kea are having some kind of conversation through glares. When I open my eyes neither of them are looking at each other. "I'm not going to change my mind," I say firmly.

"Can we please just talk about it?" Kealia asks desperately. "No," I say, standing my ground.

"But-" before she can finish Justin walks in holding a gigantic bag that says Panera on it. My mouth begins to water just from the smell.

Once we've finished eating, Justin is about to fall asleep when I tell him he should head home and sleep in his real bed. I try to get him to take Kealia but the death glare she gives both of us tells us that she isn't going anywhere. He kisses her cheek and walks over to my bed. He reaches down to hug me and holds me there for a minute. "I'm glad you're okay," he whispers in my ear. My eyes fill with tears. I hug him back tighter.

After he leaves Jane tells Rachel it's time they probably left too. Rachel says she's going to go to the bathroom before they leave and closes the door behind her.

I'd been thinking about something for a little while and finally got up the courage to ask. "Who ended up finding me?" I ask timidly.

Jane and Kealia look at each other before Kealia says "Rachel did." 

"Rachel?" I ask questioningly.

Kea nods. "Well, you weren't answering your phone and I was worried about you... So I called her and she went to go check on you. And it's a good thing she did." 

I don't say anything. No one else does either. 

When Rachel emerges from the bathroom and finds us all looking at her she raises her eyebrow.

"Rachel," I say quietly, holding my hand out to her.

She walks towards me, grabbing my hand. I pull her in for a hug and whisper "thank you" quietly, hugging her as hard as I can given my injuries. She hesitatingly hugs back, not wanting to hurt me. 

When we pull apart, she looks a little flustered, maybe blushing a little? I'm not sure, I blame my tiredness. 

When I yawn, Janes says "and that's our cue," standing up. Jane walks over, giving me a hug. I know that I haven't been here long, but I've come to love Jane like a sister almost. 

After they leave, both me and Kea are quiet.

"I don't want to report him because I-I don't think I can talk about this Kea," my voice breaking at the end. She looks at me with pity. I can't get anything else out before I break out into sobs. She rushes to my bed and wraps me in her arms. 

"Shhh, it's okay Kristie. You don't have to do anything." She rubs my back softly, soothing me. 

She holds me as I cry, not making saying anything. Not forcing me to talk either. And that is why Kealia Ohai is one of my best friends. She understands me. She knows what I need and doesn't push me to do things I don't want to do. She's there for me and supports me no matter what.

"We'll get through this Kristie," she says with tears running down her cheek. 

Later that night, I can't sleep but it's not because of the machines beeping or Kea snoring softly in the cot the nurse brought her. It's because I'm afraid to close my eyes. Afraid of my dreams and what I'll see. Afraid of him. 


	20. Night Sweats

**Rachel's POV**

I shut the door of Kealia's car softy. My mind is reeling, I have so many emotions piling up right up.

Jane doesn't start the car right away, both of us sitting in silence, allowing the other to process their thoughts.

"I swear to god, if I see him, I'm going to make sure he can't ever walk again."

Now Jane is not a violent person and she doesn't condone violence, so when she says this, I know without a shadow of a doubt that she is telling the truth.

"I'll help you."

She sighs and rubs her eyes with the palms of her hands.

"I don't know what to do J. I feel SO protective of her, I didn't even want to leave tonight. But I know that it isn't my place. We're like frenemies I guess? We can sometimes stand each other, and the other times we're both so frustrated with each other."

"Dude, you like her. That's sexual frustration," she says with a chuckle.

"But I don't think she likes me. And even if she did, she literally just got out of the shittiest relationship so I don't think she'd be ready to date soon, if ever again. Hell, she might not even like girls."

Jane looks at me skeptically. "She kissed you back, didn't she?"

I nod, "But she had also been drinking."

"Drunk actions are sober thoughts."

I roll my eyes. "Jane that doesn't fucking matter right now, she's in the damn hospital."

"I know, I know," she says and calmly puts her hand on my arm to stop me from getting worked up.

"I was so fucking scared...when I found her." Neither of us acknowledges how my voice cracks at the end or the way my eyes are filling with tears. I take a deep breath, trying to pull myself together.

"Can we just go back home please?" I ask. Jane nods her head and starts the car.

Later that night, or technically early morning, after I've showered and gotten into bed I grab my phone. I had texted Kea before getting in the shower, checking in on Kristie, seeing if they needed anything.

I figured that she would be asleep by then but when she replied quickly saying that they were good and told me to get some sleep, I just couldn't.

It took me a while before I finally fell asleep...  
  
  


_I'm walking down a hallway that I thought was the one outside our apartment but it only had two doors. One said 28, our apartment number, and another said 14, Kristie's. Her door was wide open and I don't think anything of it so I walk in._

_Her apartment looks normal, but considering I'd only been in here once, I probably wouldn't be able to tell you if anything was different._

_I walk through her kitchen, looking for her. "Kristie?"_

_I don't hear her reply or any noise so I check her living room, only to see it empty too. I walk down the short hallway and poke my head into her room. I don't see anything out of the ordinary but when I see something that looks like a shoe on the other side of her bed, I walk around the bed to check._

_Kristie is face down, her body limp. I'm by her side in a second, checking on her. I hake her shoulders, trying to wake her up. She doesn't move._

_When I go to see if she's breathing, she's not. I start to shake her harder. "No. No!"_

_She's not waking up. I didn't even realize I was crying until I see my tears falling on her shirt._

_"Rachel. Rachel!"_

I sit up in bed like I've just been burned, there's a searing pain in my chest. Jane is standing over me but steps back when I jump up. I'm sweating almost as if I've been in a sauna. It feels like my heart is about to explode out of my chest.

Jane reaches toward me and puts her hands on my shoulders, sitting down on my bed. I must've kicked off my sheets because they lay crumpled on the floor.

"What happened? I went to get some water from the kitchen and heard you yelling. I thought you were awake but came in saw you sleeping. I think you were having a nightmare."

I'm taking deep breaths so I nod my head. "Ni-nightmare."

Her eyes soften and she frowns.

"It was Kristie. She, fuck, she was just laying there." I don't need to say anything else, she gets the picture.

"Oh, Rach."

I fall back on my bed and rub my palms against my eyes, trying to stop the tears.

"I don't want to talk about it...I just want to go back to sleep."

I know Jane is worried about me, but I really can't say anything else at this moment. I don't want to think about it.

She nods her head. I know that the conversation is over for now but not forever.

"Do you want me to lay here with you for a little while?"

"Yes please," I say weakly. Whenever I'm not feeling well or upset, Jane lays with me to help calm me down or keep me company. It's something that we've done ever since we've lived together.

She moves to the untouched side of my bed and gets comfortable.

We're both quiet. "She's going to be okay Rach."

I know she said that just to reaffirm me and honestly probably herself too, but right now, I'm not sure if I believe her.

•••••

**Kristie's POV**

It's been two days since I was released from the hospital. Two days since I tried to argue with Kealia about going back to my apartment instead of going to her house. Two days since she told me I was absolutely insane if I thought that for a second she was letting me out of her sight.

Two days since I turned my phone off. I don't really even know what day it is.

I thought it would be difficult; not texting anyone, not getting on social media, not talking to anyone. But it ended up being incredibly easy.

That was my doing. I didn't want to have to deal with the "I'm so sorry" texts or the "How are you doing?" messages. So after I got about five the day, or well morning I was admitted, I turned it off and told Kea to hold it for me.

She didn't question me or complain. She just put my phone in her purse.

If I thought leaving the hospital was the hard part, I wasn't prepared for being locked inside Kea's house. Well locked isn't really the correct term.

I did it to myself. I haven't wanted to see anyone or really talk to anyone. I know that people have tried to come and visit. I've heard Kea on the phone, "No, she's not having any visitors right now...Because it's her decision and I'm going to support her?... Look maybe another day."

I've been under both her and Justin's constant care. The first day it was nice because I was so drained and exhausted, but by now, it feels like they're just hovering. They don't want me walking around too much or putting too much stress on my body.

It's quite annoying actually.

But, I just let them take care of me. After the third day, I know that both of them are missing important practices to stay at home and I force them to go.

"I'm literally just going to be sleeping during the day, the same thing I've done ever since I came home. I have soup, I have my blankets and water bottle. Both of you need to leave this house and go to practice. I have no idea how you've missed this many practices since, but please. You're both going to go crazy if you stay here any longer and so will I. So you're technically doing all of us a favor."

Justin and Kealia look at each other skeptically. Justin raises his eyebrows with a 'she's right' look.

Kea sighs before turning back to look at me. "Okay, we'll go but only on one condition."

"And dear god what is that?"

"You turn your phone on. I know that I won't be able to focus all day knowing that I can't check up on you or you can't call us if something goes wrong or you need help."

I left out a soft groan. I don't want to turn the devil device on, but I know that this is the only way I'll be able to get them out of the house. "Fine. I'll turn it on. Will that make you happy?"

Kea smiles, "Yes, very much."

I roll my eyes. "Okay, now both of you need to go get ready because you've missed too many minutes already." I shoo them towards their room to help move them along. When they turn to go get ready I sigh and walk back into my room the best that I can.

Sometimes when I move a certain way my ribs hurt, so I hobble more than walk. When I get to my room, I shut the door behind me softly. I see my phone sitting on my dresser, face down, untouched since Kealia set it thereafter I got home.

I don't know why I'm so hesitant to turn the dang thing on....I've never been one for showing emotion and I think it might be the fact that people are reaching out to me, checking in on me, that kind of touches my heart and makes me feel emotions I don't want to feel.

When I moved to Houston I told myself not to get attached to the city or the team members because I wasn't sure how long I was going to stay here. And seeing them care enough for me to check in on me, even when I really haven't been here for too long, makes me feel like I'm getting attached.

I sigh and walk over to my dresser and turn the dang thing on. The white screen with the Apple logo shows up before switching to my lock screen. And then the messages come in. I decide that I'll look through them later and put my phone in my pocket.

I hear a knock on the door and Kea pokes her head in. "Are you sure about this?" she asks hesitantly. "I don't have to leave if you don't want me to, you know that."

"I love you both to death, but if you stay here another day, I think I might strangle you," I say with a chuckle.

"I know, I know but I'm just saying that I'd be here if you wanted me to."

"I know," I say softly. "But we all need this."

She sighs. "So go," I push her out of my room and towards the kitchen. "Go to practice. The team is probably floundering without you to lead them fearlessly."

She rolls her eyes as Justin walks into the kitchen with his gym bag.

"Have fun at practice, do good, kick-ass." They look at each other before looking back at me. "I'll be fine, geez. I turned my phone on and I promise I'll let you know if I need anything. I know that there's food in the fridge, yadda yadda yadda, I'm good."

"Okay, okay, we're leaving." Justin holds up his hands in mock surrender.

They both give me a hug before leaving. When the front door finally shuts I let out a breath.

"Alone at last," I mutter and look around.

I decide to take a nap, not really having anything else to do. After settling into the couch wrapped up in a blanket I let the tiredness take me.   
  
  
  
  


I'm not sure how long I've been asleep but I'm woken up by someone shaking me. I sit up quickly and knock heads with whoever is above me.

"Owww."

"Oh shit."

I recognize the voice as Jane. I rub my head to try and ease the pain but it doesn't do anything.

"Jane? What are you doing here?" My voice is raspy and dry like I need some water.

She sits down on the other end of the couch, making sure to not sit on me. "Well I got let out of keeper training early and Kea...she was having a rough time not knowing how you were doing. I guess she texted you but when you didn't answer she got nervous. I told her you were probably sleeping but still, you know how she worries about you...but when I was done I told her I could come to check up on you and make sure you were okay.

When I walked in and saw you sleeping I was just going to let her know you were fine but you were muttering in your sleep...."

I look down at my hands.

She waits for me to say something, but when I don't she keeps going.

"How long have you been having nightmares for Kristie?"

I shrug my shoulders. I don't want to make a big deal about this, there are already too many things Kealia needs to be worried about and I don't want to worry her even more.

But, I know that Jane won't stop pushing until I tell her so I don't bother fighting her. "Ever since I've been home. I can't really sleep for long periods of time I guess...."

"Kea doesn't know, does she?"

I shake my head. "I just...she's got so much on her plate right now. I didn't want to add this..."

"Kristie, you are not a bother to Kealia or Justin. They would be worried sick if you weren't staying with them right now, you know that. They want you here."

"I just feel so helpless. Like I can't do anything to help myself or make things easier on them and it's killing me. I just feel so trapped."

"Have you left the house at all?"

I shake my head. "No...I mean, I haven't really wanted to..."

"Maybe it would be good for you to get some fresh air or something." She sounds hopeful like she thinks this is a good idea and wants to help me any way she can.

"I guess...but I don't know where I'd go."

Jane thinks for a second. "Do you want to maybe go to the soccer field?"

My eyes widen. The thought sounds a little tempting but makes me a little nervous. Before I can second guess myself I nod my head, "Yeah, let's do that."   
  
  


It takes me a few minutes to change into some decent clothes aka clothes that aren't the pajamas I've been wearing ever since I came home, but after that, I lock the house and we head to the pitch.

When we pull into the parking lot, it gets a little harder for me to breathe. Jane notices immediately.

"Hey, it's okay. Shit- I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking. We can leave-"

"No. No, it's okay. I-I just need a minute."

She nods and doesn't say anything. I do the breathing exercises that I've practiced and after a minute or two, I'm feeling better. I look over at her and nod. "I'm ready."

We walk unhurriedly into the stadium and through the hallways to the locker room. Before we go in Jane stops. "I'm not sure what Kea has told you, but everyone has been pretty worried. We just want to make sure you're okay."

She says that with so much emotion that I know she means every word. I believe her; that the girls have been worried, that they want to make sure I'm okay, that they care about me.

"Thank you, Jane," I say softly.

She nods and pulls me in for a hug. It's gentle, her not wanting to hurt me and when I hug her back tightly it takes her by surprise. When she pulls away, her eyes are shiny but we both pretend not to see it.

"So I'm not sure if they're in the locker room or not but we can just go in and sit. Or we can go onto the pitch. Whatever you want to do, okay? And if anything becomes too much, let me know and we'll leave right away."

I give her a tight smile, signaling that I'm ready. She opens the locker room door and walks in. I take a second to take a deep breath before going in after her.

Our locker room has a short hallway before rounding a corner that opens up to the main room where everyone's lockers are.

"Jane! Thank god. I was just coming in to text you. Is she okay? How is she doing?" I can Kea's voice before I can see her.

"Well, why don't you ask her yourself."

"What?" Kea asks confused.

When I come around the corner Kea hasn't seen me yet since Jane is blocking her view. When she steps to the side, Kea finally sees me. Her face goes from worried to surprised to happy to confused all in a few seconds.

"Kristie? What are you doing here?" She walks towards me and I give her a small smile.

"I thought it was time I get out of the house. I'm not here to practice or anything, just this is my safe space ya know and I was missing it." My voice goes quieter at the end.

Kea looks at me with a sad smile before wrapping me in a hug.

"Well, I'm glad you're here. If you want, the team is on a water break. Do you want to go say hi?" I can tell by her tone that she's not pushing me to do anything that I don't want to but just offering me the chance.

I think back to what Jane said, that my teammates were pretty worried about me. And since I've been ignoring all their messages, it'd probably be nice if I went and said hi.

I give a small nod.

"Yeah?" Kea asks excitedly.

"Yeah," I say, more determined.

Jane smiles when I look at her, giving me a nod of approval.

We all walk towards the tunnel, Jane and Kealia on both sides of me, almost like a protective bubble.

I think Kea can sense I'm nervous because she reaches for my hand before I can even think to reach for hers. She gives me a small squeeze and I squeeze back.

We emerge from the tunnel and everyone is sitting down on the ground, chatting, or messing around like we normally do on water breaks. Before we barely get onto the field I hear a voice, that I later learned was Amber, yell "KRISTIE!" And everyone turns to where she is pointing.

I wasn't expecting any sort of welcome like that so it surprises me when people jump up to come to see me. I take a step back, not wanting to get run into by what feels like a stampede of antelope. Jane's keeper instincts come in and she steps in front of me to block them from barreling into me.

I chuckle at Jane's protectiveness and pull her arm down gently. "It's okay, they'll be gentle."

"Okay, but you guys need to be super careful," she says the last part louder so that the team hears her. I doubt anyone is paying any attention.   
  
  


After hugs are given, we congregate for a few minutes, talking before I get tired on my feet.

"Why don't we sit down?" I turn away from Amber who I was talking to and see Kea watching me, I mouth 'thank you' to her and she blows me a kiss in return. I know I can always count on her to notice the little things like how I was getting tired on my feet and needed to rest.

Everyone just plops down on the ground but it takes me a minute to sit down, trying to not hurt my ribs or anything else.

I thought it would be awkward or hard, talking to the girls. I thought that they would want to ask questions about what happened or look at me with pity. But thankfully no one brings it up and everyone seems to be acting normal. I'm not sure if that's because someone told them to not talk about it, or if they all are respecting my boundaries.

The one person that hasn't come up to me yet is the one person I really wanted to talk to: Rachel. She's sitting about as far away from me as she could get without leaving the group. I'm waiting to see if she'd look at me but she never does and I can tell she's obviously avoiding me.

Jane sees me frown looking at her best friend.

"She's just trying to give you some space," she says quietly.

"Why would she want to do that?" I ask, confused.

"She thought that was what you wanted..."

I can't seem to understand what Jane is getting at, she raises her eyebrows when I look at her, and then I get it. The kiss.

"Oh." I can feel my face blushing and try to avoid looking at Jane. It's obvious she knows now what happened, but she doesn't seem too fazed.

"She cares about you, ya know?"

The way she stresses the word 'care' is obvious that she means care in more than a friend way.

And what's even scarier is that I can feel myself start to 'care' even more about her too.

I told myself not to get attached, but it seems that I can't help it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello loves!
> 
> Sorry this took such a long time, school has been really difficult lately. 
> 
> I'm going to try to start posting once a week on a schedule, and by try I mean try really really hard but I'm not perfect so please be patient if it doesn't happen once.
> 
> This chapter is setting up for what's coming next so I apologize if it's not what you wanted. But let me know what you think or how you feel about it! ♥️


	21. Home Visits

**Rachel's POV**

I haven't seen Kristie since she came to practice three days ago.

I texted her twice, but that's about it. I want to see her but I also want to give her space.

There's also the fact that I'm not exactly sure what she wants either. But on the third day, when me and Jane walk by her apartment door on our way to practice, I glance at her door for a second too long.

"For goodness sake Rach, just go see her." I can hear the frustration in Jane's voice as we reach the lobby.

She's been having to deal with me dancing around this situation and clearly it's annoying her.

I sigh, "I don't even know if she wants to see me, J. She sent one-word responses to both of my messages."

I felt like if she wanted to talk to me or even see me, she would've tried harder to reach me, but then again, it's Kristie we're talking about.

"So? We've been texting ever since I brought her to practice and she only responses with one-word messages to me too."

I stop when we get to the car. "Wait, you've been talking to her? And you didn't tell me?" My mouth hangs open in shock.

Jane nods and opens up the driver's side door. "Yeah," she says it like it's no big deal. She slides into the seat and I'm still standing outside the car.

"Dude, get in. We don't want to be late."   
  


Practice was uneventful.

Everyone can feel the hole of Kristie's absence but we don't speak of it. Kealia is trying to keep spirits up but we're all a little down.

About an hour in, our captain stops in the middle of a drill. Nichelle had passed to Amber and Amber missed, not trying to run after it. No one hustling to go get the ball either.

I turn to go get the ball, walking at a slow pace.

"Okay guys, come on."

We all turn towards Kea, I stop walking.

"I know that everyone is a little off about what happened recently..." she pauses, trying to find the right words.

Kea has probably felt the greatest impact of what happened to Kristie out of everyone on the team. Hell, Kristie is one of her best friends, I'd be freaked out too if something like that happened to Jane or Kea.

"But we can't let this affect our game. Off the field, we'll heal as a team, and be there for each other, and for Kristie. But on the field, we need to come back stronger. We need to get our act together, for her."

As I watch my captain and best friend speak, I'm reminded of why she is our captain, our fearless leader.

A few of us nod, some murmur "yeah", but we all get the message.

She looks at each one of us before speaking again.

"Let's take a ten-minute break and then start again, okay?"  
  


The rest of practice, everyone seemed to be more awake. We end early anyways and the locker room is quiet as we all change.

I'm switching from my sweaty practice jersey to a regular shirt when I feel someone standing behind me.

"Get your stuff, we're going to Kea's house." I sigh.

"I don't think she wants to see me, Jane."

"Well, I have come up with the perfect excuse and you don't get to say no."

I roll my eyes and turn around to face her.

"I suggested that Kea and Justin go out to dinner tonight, just the two of them, and volunteered us to stay home with Kristie."

I give her a skeptical look, "Are you up to something?" I ask accusingly.

She smirks and holds up her hands, "No, not up to anything. I just think our good friend could enjoy some time with her boyfriend and WE could check in on our other friend."

Before I can protest, Kealia walks over to us with her practice bag and I see that she's already changed.

"Hey," she smiles. "Are you guys sure that you're okay with this? I don't want you two to feel like you have to do this, really."

Jane jumps in "No, not at all. You should get out of the house with your man and we can chill with Kristie, it's not a problem."

Kea looks at me with her eyebrows raised. I really want to see Kristie so I nod, "Yeah, we totally don't mind Kea."

She smiles, "Okay, thank you guys so much. Justin and I really appreciate it. Also, I think it'll be good for Kristie to see someone other than us, I think we're driving her a little insane." She chuckles at the end.

Jane claps her hands, "Great. So we'll go home and change before we come over and that gives you time to get ready with Justin."

Kea nods, "Awesome, I can order something if you guys want? Wait," her face falls and I'm worried that she's about to back out. "If I ask Kristie what she wants to eat she'll say she's not hungry. It usually works better if we just show up with food, then she feels guilty and doesn't want to waste it..."

I frown.

I don't like hearing that Kristie hasn't been eating lately.

"We can bring something then."

I didn't even realize I was saying words until I heard them come out of my mouth.

"Are you sure? I don't want it to be a hassle, I can give you guys money."

I hold up my hand in protest, "No way. We've got it." I look to Jane for reassurance and she nods.

"Yeah, don't worry about it, Kea. Also, you don't need to worry about her tonight, we've got her."

Kea looks hesitant and I know why. She's always going to be worried about her friend, we all are now.

"You go home, we'll go change and then head over with food alright?"

She finally agrees and heads out of the locker room. Jane looks at me, "Are you ready to go?"

I nod and pick up my bag. We head out of the locker room and into the parking lot.

We're quiet in the car. Neither of us say anything, both thinking.

Me about how I'm worried about this girl, how I care for her and just want her to be okay. And how I miss her. I know it's only been three days since I've last seen her, but I actually really miss her presence, on and off the field.

I shake my head, trying to get myself to stop thinking about that.

We barely know each other. We are maybe friends? We kissed. She got hurt. And now she won't be playing for a little while. I need to focus on her and how she's feeling, not how I'm feeling. My feelings can wait.  
  
  


Both of us shower and change quickly, wanting to get over to Kea's house as soon as we can. I step into the kitchen as Jane closes the fridge, a bottle of water in her hand. She looks up when she hears me walk in.

"You ready?" I nod.

She grabs the keys and I grab my phone.

We decided on pizza, something light and sort of healthy (only when you get the healthy kind). I texted Kea once we picked it up, letting her know we were ten minutes out.

"Are you nervous?" I look up from my phone and see Jane glance at me.

"Why would I be nervous?"

"Because you keep tapping your foot, and I know you and know that that's your nervous tick."

I sigh. "I mean, kind of? I know that I like her, but I know that right now she needs to focus on getting better and healing so I'm not going to bring it up. She's got a lot on her plate right now."

Jane looks at me when we pull up to a red light. "I think you're smart with waiting....she needs a friend right now more than she needs a significant other."

She's still looking at me when the car behind us honks, letting us know that the light turned green.   
  


When we get to their house, we let ourselves in the door. Justin is standing in the kitchen on his phone but looks up when he hears the door open.

He smiles, "Hey."

I wave. Jane echos back hello and sets the pizza box down on the counter.

He looks behind his shoulder before walking closer. "She's not going to really talk all that much, she's been having a rough day. Here are her pills, the white one she needs to take before she eats and the blue one is in case she's in pain. It's Kristie so she's not going to say she's in pain but if you see her look like she's in pain, she's in pain. Just tell her she should take the pill. That's about it..."

"I didn't know we were babysitting," Jane says with a forced chuckle.

He sighs and in the new light, I can see the dark circles under his eyes, the ones that match Kea's. It seems like he's been feeling the pain that I know his girlfriend has.

"We've got this, don't worry." I try to reassure him.

I want him and Kealia to enjoy their date tonight, and not worry about Kristie.

Before he can reply, Kealia walks into the kitchen followed by Kristie.

Kea gives us a thumbs up in front of her body that Kristie can't see and I roll my eyes.

When I see her, my heart stops just a little.

She looks tired and thinner, but still beautiful as ever.

I smile and she gives me a small smile in return.

"Okay, so we'll see you guys later? Call us if you need anything alright." Kea directs the second part to me and Jane.

"Yeah, yeah. We got it, get out of here you two."

Kealia turns to Kristie and wraps her in a big hug. She whispers something in her ear that we don't hear. I can see Kristie roll her eyes at her friend but hug her back with a smile.

When they let go, Kea's eyes have a glossy tint to them but if anyone else saw, no one mentioned it.

"Bye kid," Justin says and gives her a one-arm hug, trying to lighten the mood. She chuckles and pushes him away.

"Okay mom and dad, it's time for you to go." She shoos them towards the door.

"Seriously, call if you need anything!" Kea shouts and Kristie shuts the door in her face, not in a rude way though.

She turns to face us, resting her back on the door.

She raises her eyebrows, questioning what's next.

Jane points to the box on the counter. "We brought pizza."

••••

We're sitting in the living room, the pizza box on the coffee table in front of us. Kristie is on one side of the couch with me on the other and Jane in between us.

Grey's Anatomy is on the tv and we're on the second episode of the night.

Jane gets a text message and sits up abruptly. She smirks and I can tell that she's up to something.

She locks her phone before I get a chance to see what she's looking at.

"So, Amber just texted me and she needs my help with something so I have to go." She stands up and avoids eye contact with me.

"Oh really?" I ask.

"Uh-huh, yup. She just texted me." She says hurriedly and puts her shoes on, walking towards the kitchen.

I stand up to follow her and Kristie just follows us with her eyes.

"You planned this didn't you?" I whisper accusingly.

She shrugs. We both know that she definitely planned this.

"I'll see you later," she says quietly to me and winks. "Bye Kristie, sorry I had to leave!" She shouts as she walks towards the door.

I glare at her until she closes the door and I can see her smirk as she closes it behind her.

I sigh, suddenly nervous. I run my hand through my hair, trying to calm my nerves.

'It's just Kristie,' I tell myself.

I turn to walk into the living room and see her watching me. She seems nervous too.

I sit on the couch, as far away from her as possible, but it doesn't seem to be enough space because I can feel the tension.

"So, do you want to keep watching this or...?"

She doesn't say anything, looking down at her hands.

When she looks up, I see hesitation (maybe?) in her eyes.

"I think I owe you an explanation...."

"Oh, you don't owe me anything, I promise."

"I know, but...you're the one that found me, Rachel, you saved my life." Her voice cracks at the end and my heart breaks for the beautiful, broken girl in front of me.

"I'm just sorry I didn't get there sooner."

And I mean every that. I've been thinking 'What if I invited her over?' since the night we left the hospital. Questioning if I could've done something to stop this from happening...

She wipes the tear that's rolling down her cheek, and I almost reach forward because I want to do that for her, but I stop myself. Because we aren't there, we're not that.

"I feel like you know...why I moved to Houston. I know that you saw my bruises. I also kind of feel like Kealia told you." She raises her eyebrows questioningly.

I don't deny it, but I don't confirm it either.

"You and Jane, Kealia and Justin, and one other person are the only people who know the real reason why I'm here...and I'm just not ready to share my story yet. I have to heal, and that is probably going to take a while."

I don't tell her that her sister also knows, that can wait.

"And I'm here to help any way that I can, you know that Kristie." I scoot closer to her. I feel like this conversation isn't one to have from separate sides of the couch.

"I know Rach...I just-I need time," she says the last part in a whisper and I'm confused by her words. She's messing with her hands nervously in her lap and I put one of mine over hers.

When she looks up, her eyes stop at my lips and then travel to my eyes.

I get it now.

"Hey, that's the last thing I'm concerned with right now, okay? I just want you to get better." My hand reaches out to tuck a stray piece of hair behind her ear without me thinking.

She leans into my hand and closes her eyes and my heart just about melts.

"Thank you," she whispers.

She reaches in to hug me and I wrap my arms around her. I can feel her tears on my shirt but I don't mind.

We sit there for a moment, me holding her, her leaning on me.

When she pulls away, she wipes her eyes and sniffles.

I want to do everything in my power to make her smile again, and I know right there, I would do whatever it took to make her happy.

Right now, the only thing I can do is be with her, so I ask if she wants to put Grey's back on and she nods.

We're still sitting close together on the couch, and as I go to scoot away, she grabs my arm, holding me in place.

She pulls me back down and gives me the most innocent look with her beautiful eyes, so I stay where I am.

A few minutes into the show, she leans her head on my shoulder slowly. I think she was waiting to see if I would stop her, but I wouldn't dream of it.

I look down at her without moving my head and see her watching the tv. I look away before she can see me looking down at her and smile to myself.  
  


I didn't realize she had fallen asleep until I asked her if she wanted to keep watching and when she didn't answer, I saw her with her eyes closed. She looked so peaceful.

My arm was starting to fall asleep but I didn't care. I would stay there until my arm fell off if she wanted to sleep.  
  


Netflix plays the next episode and I keep watching until I hear her murmur something in her sleep.

I look down and see that her eyes are clenched closed and she's frowning, her legs are starting to move.

When I hear her say "No" more clearly, she starts thrashing.

She's having a nightmare.

"Kristie, Kristie." I softly shake her, trying to wake her up.

When she says "No" again, her voice has so much fear in that I know right away what she's dreaming about.

I shake her harder this time.

Her eyes shoot open and her breathing is fast.

When she sees me in front of her, she makes a face. I can't tell if she's relieved, embarrassed, or upset?

"Hey, you're okay," I tell her softly.

Her body starts to shake and her breathing picks up. She's having an anxiety attack.

I reach for her shoulders, turning her towards me.

"Just focus on my breathing okay? Try to breathe with me. In, out."

It takes her a few seconds to match her breathing to mine but she eventually gets it.

"There, you got it."

She keeps following my breathing until her body stops shaking, but I can see her that her hands are still jittery. I take them in my own and motion up and down, in time with our breathing.

I don't know how long we still there like that, but it doesn't matter to me. I would sit here with her until she needed me to stop.

When she's feeling better, she sits back on the couch, scooting away from me.

I frown.

"You okay?" I ask.

She closes her eyes and turns away from me almost. I think she's embarrassed now, but she has no reason to be.

"Hey, it's okay," I say softly.

She doesn't say anything.

"Do you want to go lay down?"

She gives me a small nod, and I grab her hand as I stand up.

I know which room Kristie is staying in, I've stayed here enough to know my way around Kea's house.

We walk into her room and she lets go of my hand as she sits down on the bed.

She's drawing patterns on the comforter, not looking at me.

"So, um I'll be in the kitchen if you need anything okay?"

I turn to walk away but freeze when I hear her say "Stay...please."

I turn back around, thinking that I was hearing things, but when I see her eyes looking at me pleadingly, I know that I heard correctly.

I swallow nervously and nod.

She scoots over on the bed, giving me room to lay down.

I try to make myself as comfortable as possible and when she moves closer to me, I freeze. She goes to rest her head on the crook of my neck.

I can feel her breath along my neck. It tickles, but I don't dare ask her to move.

I slowly put my arm around her, afraid that she would ask me to stop, but when she doesn't I let my hand rest on her back.

And as I feel her settle into my side, I know that I would do anything for this girl, and that scares me just a little bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First let me apologize.
> 
> I know this is wayyyy over due.
> 
> I've really been going through it right now and my mental health hasn't been that great, but we're getting there.
> 
> I hope you can forgive me for making you wait.
> 
> As always, let me know what you think!
> 
> ♥️♥️


	22. Family

**Kristie's POV**

The sun shining through the open blinds in my room wakes me up. I yawn and slowly turn over, expecting to see Rachel there but I'm met with an empty bed. I frown and run my hand over the indention she left on my sheets. The spot where was sleeping is still warm, so she must have just left.

I smile, knowing that she slept here the entire night. Honestly, I thought she would leave once Kealia and Justin got back, so either they didn't come home last night, or they did and she decided to stay.

I really doubt it's the former.

I decide to get out of bed and go look for her. Hearing voices in the kitchen, I head in that direction. But I stop when I hear Justin and Rachel talking.

"So you decided to stay last night?"

"Um, yeah." I can hear the uncomfortableness in her voice and smile.

I can only imagine Justin giving her a questionable look, big brother mode: on.

"You two looked pretty cozy last night."

She doesn't say anything, I hold back a laugh and lean my head against the hallway, smiling.

"Are you two together or something?" he asks, straight to the point. His bluntness never fails to amuse me.

She chokes, "Um, no."

"It sure looked like something with you two laying next to each other...." I can hear the skepticism in his voice.

I think back to last night when I asked her to stay. I don't remember much after she laid down next to me, but I know that she did in fact stay and that means something to me.

"Well, I-I mean I like her but I know that right now obviously isn't the time to do anything about that. I just want her to be healthy more than anything else."

I can feel my smile grow, the fact that Rachel admitted to Justin that she liked me makes my heart beat faster.

Justin hums. "Good answer."

Neither of them says anything for a minute and I decide to make my presence known.

I make my face neutral and walk around the corner, into the kitchen. Rachel is sitting on a barstool and Justin is leaning against the island. They both look up when they hear my feet on the tile.

"Hey," I say softly. I look at Rachel but she doesn't meet my eyes. I frown but brush it off.

Justin looks from me to Rachel and then back to me. Before he can say anything I ask about his night.

"So did you and Kea have a good time last night?"

He nods, "Yeah, we had a really nice time. What about you two?"

"Um, yeah. We just watched Grey's and ate pizza really."

He raises his eyebrows, we both know that he wasn't asking that but I ignore it anyways.

Thankfully, I'm saved when Kea walks into the kitchen, she smiles when she sees us. "All of my people in one place."

The rest of the morning is uneventful. After trying to get Rachel to talk to me for about the third time, her just replying with one word and not looking up from her phone, I sigh and leave the kitchen.

I head to my room, shutting the door behind me. I don't understand what happened. I thought last night we were okay, but maybe me opening up to her scared her off?

"Dang it," I say to myself, flopping down on my bed. I grab my pillow and shove it in my face, groaning. The pillow smells like her and it only frustrates me more.

I hear a knock on my door and immediately sit up hopefully, but when Kea opens the door, my face falls.

"Hey," she says with a weak smile.

"Hi," I don't bother to keep the disappointment out of my voice.

She softly shuts the door behind her and walks over, sitting down next to me.

"So, I think we need to talk."

My heart drops. I'm worried that she knows about the Rachel thing and is going to disapprove.

"I think you need to tell your family what's been going on."

But somehow, this is worse.

"I-"

"I know, I know, you don't want to and you are mad at them, but Kristie, you got seriously hurt. You had surgery. They need to know babe."

I fall back on the bed.

"Kea, how can I tell them? I don't know how to bring it up. We haven't even talked in a while, so what do I say, 'Hey, so my ex used to beat me and then found where I lived and put me in a hospital?' They'd freak the fuck out. My parents would fly down here, or go find him. And I don't want them to confront him, that would only make it worse. I just want to sweep this under the rug and start fresh." My eyes start to fill with tears and when they fall down my cheek, I don't brush them away.

"Yeah, that would be easier I know. But how would you feel if Sam was going through the exact same thing and you found out months, or even years after? Wouldn't you be even more hurt that she didn't tell you?"

I sigh. I know that she's right.

"I-I just don't know how to tell them." My voice cracks at the end and Kea reaches for me, pulling me into a hug.

"Hey, it's okay babe. I'll be here to help you, okay? We can do this together."

I sniffle and nod. Reaching for my phone, I grab Kea's hand.

"I doubt Sam will even pick up."

"She'll pick up."

I don't know how she's so sure, but I press call on her contact and hold the phone up to my ear.

Kea squeezes my hand and gives me a reassuring nod.

It rings once, twice, and then she picks up.

_"Hello?"_

_"Uh, Sam, hey, it's me."_

_"Kristie, hi."_

She sounds relieved to hear me, I'm surprised because the last time we talked it didn't end so well.

_"Um, do you have a minute? I-I need to tell you something."_

_"Yeah of course. What's up?" _her voice sounds shaky.

_"I got hurt Sam and-and it's bad."_

I can't seem to hold it together anymore and the tears start to really flow. I feel Kea wrap her arm around me and give me a squeeze.

I spend the next hour on the phone with my sister, telling her everything. From the very beginning, to why I left, to Mark visiting me in my apartment and then the hospital. Kea sits there the entire time, holding me.

She takes it about as well as I thought she would: not well at all.

We are both a mess by the end of the conversation and Sam had bought a ticket to Houston before I could stop her.

She's getting in tomorrow and I told her that I would pick her up at the airport.

_"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow. I love you, Kristie, you know that right? I'm sorry that you didn't feel like you could tell us. I-I hate that you had to go through that alone."_

_"It's okay Sam."_

We end the call and I feel a weight lifted off of my chest.

Kea looks at me and smiles.

"Don't you feel better?"

I nod. "Yeah. Thank you for helping me do that. I -I know that need to happen and I don't think I could have done it without you."

"I just want what's best for you Kristie."

"I know Kea, and I really appreciate it."

She smiles and gives me one more hug before standing up.

"Also, you and Rachel looked really cute last night." She winks at me and laughs.

I scratch the back of my neck. "Well, I'm not too sure about that because I think maybe she's regretting it."

She pauses before opening my door, "What makes you think that?"

"Well, she didn't really talk to me at all this morning..."

"I wouldn't think too hard about it, I think that was just Rach being Rach."

I shrug my shoulders, "Well, we'll see."

"I think she just wants to give you space."

"I don't need space," I mutter.

"Just give it time."

I roll my eyes and Kea just shakes her head.  
  
  


The next morning, Kea and Justin offer to go with me to pick up Sam but I decline. I need this time to be with my sister. I need to do this alone.

I'm tapping my hands nervously on the steering wheel as I wait for her to walk out. I still have to wear the brace on my wrist and the stitches are still in my face. I pull down the visor to check the damage and grimace. I don't look that good but there's nothing I can do.

"It's just Sam, she's your sister," I tell myself.

_From Sammy_

_Walking out now, I have a surprise!_

'A surprise?' I think to myself.

I look up and watch the double doors open and close as people walk in and out, waiting for her to walk out, suddenly nervous.

The doors open and I see Sam walk out, followed by Steph.

My heart drops.

It's my best friend. But I wasn't expecting her to be with Sam and this throws me off.

Sam sees me and waves, I give a small wave in return and open the car door slowly.

They both freeze when they see my face but recover quickly, trying to hide their shock.

"Hey Kristie," my sister says quietly, she looks unsure whether or not to hug me.

"I'm not going to break Sam, you can hug me."

She smiles sheepishly and reaches for me. Her arms feel so familiar and for the first time since I left Chicago, I feel at home.

I hug Sam and then hug Steph. I still feel a little hurt by her words but it must mean something that she's here.

Although I didn't tell her, so Sam must have.

"So we're going to head to Kealia and Justin's and then we can go get something to eat or...do whatever." We put their suitcases in the trunk and get in the car.

"Why are we going to Kealia and Justin's?" Steph asks.

"Oh, um that's where I'm staying. I haven't gone back to my apartment yet."

"Oh."

"Yeah..."

The car ride to their house is silent, no one really knowing what to say. I'm really hoping that the rest of the time they're here isn't like this because I don't know how much longer I can stand this.

Luckily the ride back to Kea's isn't that long and when I pull through their gate I feel myself relax a little.

\----

We're all sitting in the living room when the topic that I've been dreading finally comes up.

"So do you know where Mark went? Has he tried to contact you?"

"Uh, no. I'm not sure where he went but I don't really care."

"Well didn't you press charges? Isn't there going to be a hearing?"

"Umm, no. I didn't..."

Sam turns to look at me. Her mouth wide open.

"You didn't turn him in? Kristie, he almost killed you, on multiple occasions," she turns to look at Kealia, "How could you let her not turn him in?"

"You don't need to remind me, okay? I know what he did. I had to live with it."

"Hey, let's all take a deep breath." Kea tries to defuse the situation, but it doesn't help.

"Kristie he needs to be behind bars. He's literally walking around right now, free!"

I stand up, annoyed.

"Don't you think I know that? That I'm scared every single damn day that the guy that single-handedly ruined my life and tormented me for months is out there?"

"I just think-"

"It doesn't matter what you think Sam! You should support me! Geez, maybe I shouldn't have told you after all."

"Hey, you don't mean that-" she looks hurt, but I don't care.

"Yes. Yes, I do." I say it with so much seriousness and her face falls.

"I'm leaving." I grab my car keys and walk towards the door.

"Kristie-" I hear Kea call out for me but I've already slammed the door and am heading towards my car.

\----

The red door is looming in front of me, taunting me. I take a deep breath and use my key to unlock the door, pushing it open slowly.

I haven't stepped foot in my apartment since the incident.

I don't even know what I'm doing here. I was driving around and somehow ended up back in front of my apartment building. And I actually decided to go in.

I pause before stepping over the threshold. The apartment is cleaned up, there isn't glass on the ground or furniture pushed over anymore. You would never be able to tell what happened here.

I slowly walk around the living room, running my hand along the back of the couch, the images coming back to me.

The yelling, the throwing.

I'm brought back to the present by my phone buzzing, but I ignore it. I know that it's probably Kealia or Sam but they'll be fine waiting for a little while.

"Hey."

I jump when I hear a voice, turning to find who it is.

"Geez, you almost gave me a heart attack." My heart is beating really fast, and my hand is over my heart.

"Sorry," Rachel chuckles. She's standing in the hallway, looking into the apartment.

"I didn't know you were moving back in."

"I, uh, I'm not. I just came to get away."

"Get away?" she asks, confused.

"Yeaaaah, my sister is in town and she brought my best friend, well my old best friend. And I just needed to get out of that house. It was a little much." I scratch the back of my neck, nervously.

She nods, "I get it."

Rachel is still standing on the other side of the door, looking in.

"You can come in," I say with a chuckle.

She smiles sheepishly and walks in, looking around. Neither of us says anything for a minute.

"Why did you basically ignore me, the morning after you stayed?" I ask quietly.

She sighs and runs a hand through her long blonde hair. "Kristie, I like you, okay. I think that's pretty obvious. But right now, I just feel like you don't need that in your life. I want you to focus on getting healthy first."

I step toward her. "Rachel, I appreciate you looking out for me, but I'm a big girl. I can make my own decisions." The last part comes out as a whisper as I'm standing right in front of her.

"I-I know, I just think-"

"Don't think." My eyes are on her lips, and her eyes are scanning my face.

"Kristie," she says hesitantly.

"Rachel."

Before either of us can lean in, my phone starts to ring. I sigh and Rachel looks relieved.

I pull my phone out from my pocket and check the name.

_Incoming call from Kea_

"You should probably answer that," she whispers.

I roll my eyes but hit accept, putting the phone up to my ear.

_"Hey, what's up?"_

_"Hey... I just wanted to see where you were, you left and I was worried."_

I sigh. _"I'm fine Kea, I just needed to get out of there. Sam was making me upset."_

I see Rachel frown but she doesn't say anything.

_"I know, she shouldn't have said that. I'm sorry... Are you okay? I didn't know where you were..."_

_"I'm fine. I uh, I'm at my apartment."_

_"Oh." _I can hear the surprise in her voice. _"Do you need me to come over?"_

_"No, Rachel is here." _I look up when I mention her and we make eye contact.

_"Ohhhh." _I can hear the smirk in her voice.

_"No, not like that. She was just walking by and my door was open so she peaked her head inside." _I think we all know that it could be like that, but it's not right now. I see Rachel blush a little, but ignore it.

_"Okay, well... I'll let you be. I would text Sam though. I think she's upset-"_

_"Yeah, well I'm upset too. She doesn't get to come here and just start questioning every single decision I've made when she's only now finding out about what happened._

_And she brought Steph without even asking. I know that she thought it would be a nice surprise, but Steph really hurt me. It's easier to forgive Sam because she's my sister, but it's different with her."_

Kea is quiet for a moment and I look up to see Rachel quickly glance away with a look on her face. I don't have time to decipher it because she turns her back to me, looking around the room.

_"Just talk to them. They only want to be there for you and to do that, you have to actually let them."_

I roll my eyes at her statement. "_Yeah, yeah. I'll let you know when I'm coming home."_

_"Okay. Have fun, make smart choices!"_

I roll my eyes and put my phone back in my pocket.

Rachel turns to look at me like she wants to say something, but she doesn't.

"Do you want to stay for a little while?" I surprise myself by asking that question.

At first, I was afraid she would say no, but she smiles. "Yeah, I guess I could stay."

\-----

"Okay, but you were SO mean to me when I showed up!" I laugh as Rachel shakes her head in denial. I'm sitting cross-legged on one end of the couch and she's on the other with her feet propped up against my coffee table. Both of us turned to look at each other.

"Okay, okay," she holds up her hands in surrender. "But you weren't peachy to me either!"

I'm not sure how long we've been sitting here, us moving to sit on the couch shortly after she decided to stay.

"Only because you basically hated me since I got here!"

She rolls her eyes, trying to keep a straight face but she can't hold back a smile.

"I think, I always really admired the way you played. You're completely ruthless on the field," there's almost awe in her voice. I'm not used to Rachel complimenting and I can feel my cheeks start to warm. "Plus, you took me down when we played you guys last year. I'll never forgive you for that." She smirks and this time I roll my eyes.

"Well, I'm glad you don't hate me anymore." I smile, and she feigns confusion.

"Woah, woah, woah. I never said that."

I grab the pillow I was resting on and hit her with it.

She laughs and grabs the pillow from me, "Fine you win!"

We're both laughing and it feels easy. Being with Rachel, being comfortable around her.

Our laughs die out, both of us consumed by our thoughts.

"I know that you coming here, uh it wasn't out of the best circumstances," she looks up from messing with the pillow in her hands, "but I'm glad you're here now Kristie."

"Me too," I say softly.

My phone buzzes and the moment is officially over.

I sigh when I see that it's Sam.

_From Sammy_

_Can you come home so we can talk?_

I let out a frustrated moan and drop my phone in my lap.

"What's up?" Rachel asks curiously.

"Sam. I just- I don't know. I'm annoyed with her right now....but I might have overreacted."

Rachel pauses before replying, "I mean, you have a right to feel how you feel about this. She probably just wants to be helpful and be there for you. She just doesn't know how. This is all new to her too, so maybe help her out a little. I'm sure she has questions and concerns. Maybe just hear her out."

I let my head fall back against the couch.

"She's also adjusting to all the new information too. You told her, like yesterday right?"

I nod.

"See?"

"I guess...I should probably go talk to her." I sigh. Rachel nods and stands up as I stand up too.

"Thanks for hanging out with me today," I smile at her and she gives me a shy one in return.

"Yeah...I like spending time with you, Kristie."

"You should come by Kea's house tomorrow. You can catch up with Sam, I know you two haven't seen each other in a while." She looks hesitant but gives in.

"Yeah, maybe I'll do that."

"Great, just let me know. I don't think we have any plans so we'll probably just be around the house."

"Okay, I'll text you tomorrow," she says and heads to the door. I follow her, walking her out.

I grab the door handle and open it for her, "I'd like that," I say gives her a soft smile.

She gives me a small wave before walking out the door, I shut it after she leaves. Resting my head against the door I tell my heart to stop beating so fast.

I reach for my phone and reply to Sam

_To Sammy_

_About to head home. Let's go somewhere and talk._   
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi friends.
> 
> I know it's been a hot minute and I'm sorry.
> 
> I've had finals and I was going to update last week but last week I lost someone and I had to take time away from writing and social media.
> 
> Suicide is permanent solution to a temporary problem. Please know that it does get better, even if it doesn't seem like it will. If you ever need to talk, to rant, vent, or just chat, know that I'm here. ♥️
> 
> I'm hoping to start updating more regularly now that I'm on Christmas break.
> 
> Sooo.... Kristie and Rachel finally admitted they liked each other. And we all said awww.🥺
> 
> How do y'all think Kristie's conversation with Sam will go? What will be brought up?👀


	23. More Than A Team(mate)

**Rachel's POV**

As soon as I left Kristie's apartment I knew that I need to talk to Sam before Kristie does.

Kristie can't find out that I told Sam. That I told her sister before she did and Sam has actually known what happened for a little while now. That would absolutely ruin everything and anything that could happen.

"Shit, shit, shit." My phone doesn't seem to understand that I'm in a hurry and it feels like forever before my contacts load.

After hitting her name, I lift the phone up to my ear and push open my apartment door, shutting it behind me quickly.

_"Hello?"_

_"Thank god. Sam, it's me-"_

_"Yeah, I know that it's you, Rachel, duh." _She chuckles but doesn't seem annoyed.

_"Kristie doesn't know that I told you what happened." _I don't bother beating around the bush because don't know how much time I have before they meet up.

Sam is silent for a moment. _"So...what are you saying? You don't want me to tell her that you told me? Is that what you're getting at?"_

I sigh. _"I know how that sounds...but yeah." _I cringe at my own words and walk into the kitchen, running a hand through my hair.

_"I don't get it. Why? Why can't she know that you told me?"_

_"Because I wasn't even supposed to know then. She never officially told me what happened until she got out of the hospital."_

Sam is quiet.

_"I know that I need to be honest with her and I will I promise. Just please let her hear it from me."_

Sam sighs and I can feel her uncertainty through the phone.

_"Please Sam," _I ask again, knowing how desperate I sound.

_"Okay, fine. But you have to tell her okay? And if you don't then I will. And you know it'll be worse if she hears it from me."_

_"I know, I know. Thank you SO much."_

She ends the call, and I put my phone down on the kitchen counter.

"I really fucked up," I mutter to myself.

"Yeah, you kind of did."

Jane pops up from the couch and I yelp.

"Jesus, Jane. You scared me."

"I've literally been here the whole time, you just didn't see me." She rolls her eyes and stands up, walking into the kitchen too.

She's looking at me like she has something to say, and I know she's going to say whatever is on her mind. "Just say it."

"I can't believe you told Sam, Rach. One, what the hell were you thinking? And two, do you really think Kristie is just going to forgive you for this?"

"I don't know! I mean, we kind of just had a moment? And like-"

"Wait, what?"

I huff. "I was going to the store and I saw that her apartment door was opened, and I peeked inside just to make sure that someone wasn't breaking in or something. She was there and then we just like, talked for a while? I ended up telling her I liked her and she basically said she liked me too?"

Jane's face lights up. "Really? Freaking finally!"

I hold my hand up, telling her to wait, "But, I said that she should probably focus on getting better right now, and we can worry about us later."

Her face softens.

"I'm not going to rush anything because, after everything she's been through, she doesn't need that right now," I say with a shrug.

"Rach-"  
  


My phone chimes, cutting her off. I look down to see a message from the same blonde girl we had been talking about.

My face must freeze because Jane comes to stand next to me, "What is it?"

She looks over my shoulder, "Oh."

"Do you think Sam told her?" I bite my lip nervously, looking over at Jane who shrugs her shoulders.   
  
  


_From Kristen_

_My thing with Sam...went. idk it was weird_   
  
  


"I think she's just trying to talk?"

"So then talk to her," Jane says with an over-exaggerated eye roll.

Before I can respond she sends me another message  
  
  


_From Kristen_

_I know she's just trying to be there for me but idk how to let her..._   
  
  


I feel guilty knowing that it's partially my fault that Sam is acting weird. "I should just tell her, right?" I look up at Jane, biting my lip nervously.

"I mean, you need to tell her. And don't freaking wait a while because if you two start dating and thenshe finds out, she'll be _so_ pissed. And rightfully so."

"We're not going to start dating J," I say exasperated.

"You never know," she answers in a singsong voice, walking back over to the couch before plopping down.

"Just, I really like her...And I know that when I tell her she's going to hate me." I move from the kitchen into the living room, before sitting down next to Jane.

"You don't know that," she answers softly. "Yeah, she's probably going to be really pissed, but she could forgive you." My phone vibrates yet again and my heart still speeds up when I see her name.   
  
  


_From Kristen_

_oh yea, and kea said you and j should come over tomorrow. justin is cooking or something _   
  
  


"Okay see y'all aren't even dating and you already light up when she texts you." I look up just in time to catch the end of her eye roll and I kick her with my foot, sticking my tongue out at her before replying.  
  
  


_To Kristen_

_i'm sorry that things didn't go well :( i think for her being there for you, only you can decide how she can. maybe she's just still processing everything and needs time to adjust? she loves you and you know she'd do anything for you_

_also we're down for tomorrow, do we need to bring anything??_   
  
  


The next day we stop at HEB before going over to Kealia's and that is how I end up stuck in the ice cream section of the store.

"Oh my gosh Rachel, just freaking pick one already!"

"I don't know what kind of ice cream she likes okay! What if I get strawberry and she hates it? I get pistachio and she could be deathly allergic. Chocolate or vanilla? She might not even like ice cream for all I know."

It should not be this stressful to pick a flavor. All she said was "ice cream!" but she never said which kind. Which is how I ended up in this dilemma.

"If you don't pick one in three seconds I'm going to pick for you and it'll be what I want."

So that is how I ended up with three cartons of ice cream and one annoyed friend.   
  
  


We walk into their house, knowing that we don't need to nock with Jane yelling "we're finally here...and we brought the entire ice cream section of HEB with us."

I only glare at her walk towards the freezer, wanting to put them in before they melt too bad.

I hear a soft "hey" behind me and can't help the smile that appears on my face.

"Hi," I answer, turning and seeing her smiling back at me.

"I don't think you have enough ice cream," she says with a chuckle.

"Well I didn't know what kind everyone wanted so I just got a few," I say instead of "I didn't know what kind you liked so I almost bought the entire store."

She just shakes her head and leans her hip against the counter. I use this moment to look at her, actually look at her. The bags under her eyes are almost gone, the swelling from her stitches has gone down significantly and she still has the soft cast one. The few bruises that I can see are fading but still look pretty gruesome.

But then I see her eyes shining in the kitchen light and the small smile on her lips, even with everything that's been going on, she still looks beautiful.

Kristie starts to say something but before she can get the words out, Sam appears by her side. "Hey Rachel, can I talk to you?" with her head tilted.

The tone of her voice clearly means that this isn't up for discussion so I just swallow the lump in my throat and nod my head. Kristie looks confused but doesn't say anything as I step around her, Jane just raises her eyebrow when she sees us walk by, I shake my head.

I close the sliding glass door behind me and watch as Sam crosses her arms over her chest. I know that whatever she's going to say isn't going to be good.

"What the heck do you think you are doing?" she asks firmly.

My face scrunches in confusion, "I don't know what you mean Sam?"

"With my sister! And telling her the truth. Both of you look pretty cozy next to each other and she literally just got out of a horrible relationship. She's not ready for another one."

I sigh. "Sam. One, you don't get to decide when she's ready for another relationship, only she does. And two, even if she was ready, I'm not. I like her too much to rush into this and I want her to focus on getting better first. But that doesn't mean that I'm going to completely like, ignore her," I say rolling my eyes. "We're both adults."

"You need to at least tell her the truth then. I can't keep lying to her and you can't keep making me." She gets louder as she continues and I know that she needs to keep her voice down.

"Sam, I _know, _okay. I plan on telling her." I can feel the frustration start to grow inside me so I take a deep breath, telling myself to calm down.

"You need to do it soon or else I will. Get your crap together Rachel. Don't drag her down with you." And with that she pushes past me back into the house, shutting the door behind her rather harshly.

I run my hand through my hair, trying to figure out how I'm going to drop this bomb on her. The door opens and I turn to see who it is, my body tensing up when I see the same girl I'm trying to not think about step across the threshold.

"Everything okay?" she asks, concern written all over her face.

I force a smile on my face, "Yeah, yeah. We're good."

"Did Sam say something to you? Because I'll talk to her-" She turns quickly to go get her sister but I reach for her arm, stopping her.

"No, it's fine. Nothing happened, we just talked." I can tell she's still skeptical but I nod my head, trying to be believable.

I can see the thoughts running through her mind, trying to determine if I'm being honest. She finally sighs and turns back to look at me.

I realize I'm still holding onto her and take a step back, putting space in between us. She looks confused for a second, uncertain as to why I'm suddenly being so distant when we've been so close lately. I try my best to not let her see that I hate the space too.

We spend the rest of the afternoon hanging out, traveling from their backyard back into the living room after it got back with the temperature dropping. I try to smile and laugh, actually participate in the conversations, but the entire time my mind is turning.

I want what's best for Kristie, and what if I'm not it? I know that I have a past, everyone knows about it almost. I know that I can be stubborn and jealous and stupid. She doesn't need that in her life right now.  
  
  


I rest my head against the car window as Jane drives back to our apartment, neither of us speaking.

When she parks the car, she turns to look at me, leaving it running. "What happened tonight?"

My head turns to look at her slowly. We both know that I can't hide anything from her, she'll find out eventually or I'll cave.  
  
  
  


"I can't drag her down with me... She-she doesn't need that right now. I can't be selfish."

"What are you talking about Rach?"

"Kristie. Everything. Sam was right, I just need to stay away from her." I let my head fall back against the headrest, feeling emotionally drained.

She just shakes her head. "When you were too wrapped up in whatever was going on up there," she points to my head, "she was very clearly concerned. She kept glancing at you, almost begging you to look at her. Sam might think that you need to stay away, but Kristie doesn't want that."

I just shake my head, disagreeing with her. I've made my decision.

She sighs. We both know this conversation is over.

I try to put as much space between myself and a certain blonde as possible. I can't ignore her, I couldn't do it even if I tried, but I don't reply as fast to her messages when she asks if I wanted to get coffee the next day, I tell her I can't. Soon she stops trying to continue the conversations.  
  
  


Three days after we went over to Kealia's, I get a call at almost nine o'clock.

"Kristie?" I answer, confused as to why she's calling me at this time when we haven't talked in almost two days. Two days since I decided that she would be better off without me.

I hear a sniffle on the other end of the phone and I sit up, filling with concern.

"What's wrong? Are you okay?"

"C-can I come stay with you guys tonight? I'll stay out of you way I promise, we don't even have to talk, I-I just can't stay here tonight."

Before she finishes her sentence, I'm standing up from the couch, heading into my room to get my shoes. Jane looks up from her seat at the table, confused by the sudden change in my demeanor. "Where are you?"

"I'm still at Kea's, I can drive over I just wanted to ask instead of just showing up-"

"Don't move. I'm on my way."

I walk back through the kitchen and head towards the door when I hear Jane asks, "Everything okay?" Grabbing the keys off the island, I say over my shoulder, "Kristie's coming over. I'm going to get her."

Before she can answer, I'm out of the front door and quickly heading to my car.  
  
  


I'm not entirely sure what I'm expecting when I walk into the door of Kealia's house but I wasn't expecting everyone to be standing in the kitchen, almost like they were waiting for me.

I freeze when everyone turns to look at me.

"Um, hi?" I say, unsure of what is going on.

Kealia has her hands pressed against the counter, a frustrated look on her face. Sam looks uncertain, almost an uncomfortable look on her face. Stephanie is glaring at me like she's annoyed by my presence.

"Okaay," my eyes traveling from each person, in search of a specific one who doesn't seem to be present.

"I'll go get her," Kea says, almost dejectedly.

"She doesn't need to leave-" Steph interjects and Sam scoffs.

I feel like I'm standing in a land mine, any step I take will result in an explosion I'm not prepared for.

When Kealia emerges again a few minutes later, Kristie is following her, a backpack thrown over her shoulder.

Her gaze meets mine and I can see the tiredness in her eyes and the tear stains on her cheeks. I have no idea what's going on or why she called me, but I know that I would take away that pain in a minute.

"Can we just talk about this please?" Stephanie tries to step towards Kristie but Kealia holds her hand up, stopping her from getting any closer. Kristie uses that moment of distraction to scoot past Kea and come stand behind me. I don't know why I suddenly feel protective, wanting to put myself in front of her and in between her and the other people in the room.

"No," this time Sam is the one shaking her head. "It's not your decision to make. Just like it isn't mine, or Kealia's, or Justin's or anyone else's except for hers."

I turn to look at Kristie but she's avoiding eye contact, looking at the ground. Still confused, I look back at Kea and she just shakes her head. I take the hint and decide it's probably time for us to go.

I grab the bag off of Kristie's shoulder and she starts to walk towards the door, back to the car.

"Kristie-"

She pauses in front of me and I have to stop myself from almost running into her back. "You really should go back home Steph. You too Sam." My eyes widen and I glance from where she stopped to the other side of the room.

Sam looks hurt by her sister's words and Steph's mouth is just hanging out like she wants to say something more. Kristie doesn't wait for them to respond and opens the door harshly.

I look to Kea for some kind of explanation but she just shakes her head and mouthes "later". I nod my head and shut the door behind me before quickly catching up with the girl.

She doesn't say anything on the drive, just staring out the window. I don't need to look to see that she has tears rolling down her cheeks, I know by the small sniffles she makes every other minute or so.

I'm dying to ask what happened, but if she wanted me to know, she would tell me. Plus, I think she needs a minute to herself. So I just drive back to my apartment, comfortable in the silence.   
  
  


When we pull into the building parking lot, I don't turn the care off right away.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I ask softly, finally turning to face her.

She shakes her head, "No," she pauses before continuing. "Look, I'm sorry that I called you. I can stay in my apartment, I just needed Kea to see that I was going with you because she wouldn't let me stay alone tonight. I'll stop bothering you and get out of your hair." I can hear the nervousness in her voice as she reaches for the door handle, but she freezes when my hand finds hers.

"You're not bothering me," I say quietly but with force. Because she's not. It's the opposite.

I missed her more than I can put into words, but I know that she doesn't want to hear them and I'm not ready to say them.

She swallows whatever is in her throat and runs a hand through her hair, something she does when she's anxious I noticed.

"I'll just stay at my place tonight. And I can ask Kea or Justin to pick me up tomorrow. I'm sorry that you had to stop whatever it was you were doing, I really appreciate it." Her voice cracks at the end of the sentence and with that she quickly reaches behind my seat for her bag before hurrying out of the car.

I jump up to follow her, accidentally slamming the car door harder than I intended.

"Kristie, you aren't bothering me, I swear. And you don't have to stay alone tonight at your place, you can stay with me and Jane. You won't be a bother, I promise. Please, stay with us."

She bites her lip in hesitation, looking anywhere but at me. And when she finally does make eye contact with me, her eyes glassy, almost spilling over with tears.

"I thought you liked me, Rachel. I thought I made it clear that I liked you too, and then something happened and suddenly it seems like you don't want anything to do with me. And I know that I'm a lot, I know I've got a lot going on and am a mess, but I really thought you liked me too. But it's clear now that you don't, that I did something and now you regret it all, so I'll stop."

"You didn't do anything? I- You aren't bothering me, I promise."

"Then why does it feel like you want nothing to do with me? I thought, I thought we were good. I thought we felt the same about each other. I don't know what I did, but I'm _sorry_."

I stand there trying to figure out how to say what I want to say: that I want her to be happy and heal and how I only think I'm going to hold her back from those things. Her gaze is only getting stronger and I know that I need to say something before this really blows up.

"You shouldn't be the one apologizing. I need to be." She tilts her head in confusion as I continue. "I let something get inside my head and I thought that it would be better for you if I gave you space and I hated every minute of it. I just don't want to drag you down with me."

I was expecting her to yell, or cry, or be upset. It would've crushed me to make her cry but I would've dealt with it. I wasn't expecting her to close the distance between us and suddenly I can feel the little puffs of air she's letting out as she breathes. "Why won't you even give us a chance?" 

I know it's because of my insecurities, the fact that I have a not so great track record, and a hot temper that I'm hesitant to give us a chance. I know that I've got my own baggage right now and I don't want to add all of that to hers.

But I also know that I want this, whatever this is and whatever it is going to be. I want to be with her.

So I tell her that, well more like show her.

At first, she was caught off guard when I brought my lips to hers, but soon she melts into the kiss. One of my hands finds the apple of her cheek and the other rests at the back of her neck.

They can't tell who runs out of breath first, but it doesn't matter anyway, smiles on both of their faces.

Kristie blushes and I just laugh, grabbing her hand and pulling her towards the lobby and up to our apartment. When we pass her door, she almost stops, but I shake my head and drag her to our door.

Jane looks up from her seat at the counter, standing to greet our guest while I take her bag and set it down by the couch for now.

"You okay?" she asks, holding the girl at arm's length. Kristie nods but doesn't elaborate.

"What happened?"

I bite my lip, wanting to know the answer too. Kristie sighs before going to sit on the couch, the two of us following her.

"Steph and I got into a fight....and then Sam got in it and then Kealia, but only to protect me."

"It did feel really tense when I got there," I say, making a face.

"Steph just, she doesn't understand why I won't go to the police...and I've told her that I don't want to but she kept on pushing. Saying that I don't turn him in and he does this to another girl then that would be my fault."

My mouth falls open in shock and Jane makes an angry scoff. 

Kristie gives us a knowing look, "And that's when Sam jumped in... I love her, I really do, but she just doesn't get it, neither of them do. But Sam told Steph that it is my choice and to let me make it. Then they started fighting," she says with an eye roll.

"It was fine until they started yelling, Sam said that Steph needed to be more understanding, Steph said that Sam needs to not be so naive, and them yelling just kind of set me off... So I had a panic attack and of course, that's when Kea walked in."

I grimace, knowing very well that my best friend does not like it when things get out of hand as Sam and Stephanie did. Add in Kristie having a panic attack and she would have completely lost it.

"She yelled at them both to shut up, which I'm surprised they heard over their own shouting. Even after I calmed down, Steph still wasn't giving up. So Kea said that it would probably be best if I didn't stay there tonight since she can't really kick either of them out, ya know? So I called you and now here I am."

Jane's mouth is hanging open and I know that I have a look of bewilderment on mine.

She keeps rambling, "And I know that they're both just trying to help, and I know that Sam is trying at least, but Steph is just so angry. Angry at him, and at me. But I think they're both going back soon, they have practice and everything." It's obvious she's trying to play this off like it doesn't bother her, but the slight wobble of her bottom lip gives her away.

Jane stares at her for a second before speaking, "Well you can stay as long as you need to, you're always welcome here," patting her leg affectionately.   
  
  


We all hang out in the living room for a little while longer before Jane yawns and declares she's going to head to bed.

Aaaand that just leaves the two of us.   
  
  


"Kristie-"

She holds up her hand, signaling me to stop. "I really don't need to hear from you too that I should turn him in, so please don't say that."

My face softens. In this dim light of the living room, it's easy to see how tired she is with the bags under her eyes and cheeks sunken in almost.

"I wasn't going to say that," I reply softly. "I was going to say that was Stephanie said was wrong. And that you should do what you're most comfortable with, and if that is not reporting him, then that's that." 

She looks at me hesitantly, like she doesn't believe that I'm agreeing with her, but I reach for her hand and squeeze it gently. 

I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket and pull my hand away to grab it. I see her frown slightly at the loss of contact before hiding it. 

It's from Kea, asking how Kristie is. I quickly let her know everything is fine before closing the messages to check the time. 

My eyes widen when I see that it's almost 11:30. I look back up to find Kristie watching me intently. "Well," I pause, getting ready to stand up, "it's almost midnight and I've got practice tomorrow, so I'll go ahead and get my pillow from my room and then you can have the bed, I'll sleep out here." I nod to the couch with my head, already accepting the fact that that is where I'll be sleeping tonight.

"No way," she says shaking her head. "I'm not kicking you out of your own room, I've got the couch." 

I raise my eyebrows, "We're not having this discussion. You've got the bed-"

"Well, I'm not sleeping in the bed-"

"We're not both sleeping on the couch that's just stupid-"

"I'll sleep in the bed. On one condition." She holds up her finger, and I prepare myself for whatever it is she wants because I know that I'll do whatever it is.

"Okay, what is it?"

"You sleep in the bed next to me. You can't be sore for practice tomorrow."

The sound that I make comes out as a half snort half cough, I wasn't expecting that.

"Uh, well I-I really don't think that's a good idea," I try to argue my case.

She rolls her eyes dramatically. "We've done it before, nothing has changed."

I don't tell her that my feelings for her have changed, now I know for sure that I like her and I don't know if I can stand to be that close to her without wanting to run my hand through her hair or lean over and kiss her. 

So I reluctantly agree. 

Later when I look over at my alarm clock over Kristie's sleeping body, I quietly curse myself for being awake at 2:13 when I have practice at 9. I try to move as little as possible, searching for a position that I'm most comfortable in, which of course ends up being one facing the girl quietly passed out right next to me. 

In the moonlight I can see all the imperfections she doesn't have. My eyes pause at the line of stitches on the side of her face, before tracing her small nose, her lips, and then her chin. I don't let my eyes dip too low, even though she is wearing a large pajama shirt, I still have some respect. 

She begins to stir and I freeze, afraid that I'll wake her up. She goes from on her side to on her stomach, face pushed against the pillow when her arm reaches out to grab onto something. I try to shrink away from her hand but it latches onto my arm and I swear I can hear her sigh contently and melt into the bed. 

I make myself close my eyes, the image of the beautiful blonde sleeping next to me burned into my brain forever.

Instead of going back to Kealia's house in the morning, Kristie asks to go to practice with us. I give Jane a questioning look, unsure of how to respond. 

"If you don't take me, I'll just Uber." 

So that is how Kristen Mewis ended up on the practice field, kicking a ball around, a week after she was released from the hospital. 

"Are we sure that she's allowed to be like, doing physical activity this early?" I hear Bianca whisper behind me. I turn to see if she's talking to me but find Amber standing right next to her, both of them concerned looks on their face.

"You go try and tell her that," I say, nodding in her direction with a smirk on my face.

Both of them shake their heads quickly, stepping back. I just laugh. No one would be stupid enough to try and stop Kristie from doing what she wants to do. 

She must hear me because I look over at her again only to meet her eyes, raised in questioning. 

"Oh shit," I hear Amber mutter before pushing Bi and walking away quickly when they see her head our direction.

She squints her eyes in confusion but I just smirk. "You scared them off," I say with a chuckle. 

"But what did I do?" Dear lord when she pouts I feel like my knees could buckle right then and there. 

I somehow muster a shrug, knowing that I wouldn't be able to speak even if I tried. 

"Hmph."

"Kristie." 

We both turn to find the source of the sound and see Clarkson motion for her. She throws me a hesitant look over her shoulder while she walks toward him. 

"What's all that about?" I shrug my shoulders, turning to face Jane who had just walked up next to me.

"I dunno. I bet it has something to do with her practicing...like I really don't think she's even supposed to be working out, let alone kicking a ball around. He's the only one that can pretty much tell her she can't be here."

"Yeah, but if he makes her leave, it'll only make it worse. She physically _needs _to be here. Not in Kea's house, not in our apartment, here is where she feels the most at home." 

I sigh, knowing she's right. "Plus, I really don't think she wants to be with her sister or Steph right now."

Jane tsks, not happy with yesterday's events either. 

Clarkson lets her stay on the field, but she can't do that much, only passing the ball softly, and she can't stand for too long. I volunteer to be her partner in drills, one wanting to spend more time with the girl, and two knowing that Mewis is still self-conscious about her injuries to play with anyone else besides me or Kea.

So each day until our next game, we're on the field passing the ball back and forth. Sometimes she'll pass the ball and set me up for a goal, other times she'll hold the ball and make me work on my footwork, but it's always just the two of us, no one else.

Everyone can see what's happening. They can see the way that Kristie's face lights up when she's talking to me or the way my eyes are always trained on Kristie, even when she's across the field. The team can sense how close we're getting, but no one says anything, just happy that the two of us are actually getting along. I know because Jane says something to me about it after practice one day.

So what if sometimes our hands linger on each other back or arm, or if our pinky fingers lock when we pass by each other. 

I'm not the only one who's enjoying having her on the field, the rest of the team is too. When we're running 6v6 drill and she's resting on the sidelines, she yells encouraging things or tips for better defending, having a better view than normal. She keeps everyone's morale up, getting them excited for our next game. 

But off the pitch, things aren't the same. She tries to keep up a good front with everyone else, but I know the truth. She still struggles with Sam, allowing her sister to be there for her is something she isn't very good at, even admitting so. Opening up about her past is still hard for her. Steph is a different story. Kristie doesn't have to forgive her that easily. 

Lately, my phone has become another one of my appendages. I don't mean for it to happen, but I just can't help it. Waiting for that notification letting me know that she wants to talk, I know it's rude to text when you're at dinner or with friends but if she needs me, I'll be there. 

I know that Jane watches me, her eyes burning in the back of my head when I stand up to answer her call, shutting my bedroom door behind me.

When game day comes, Kristie rides with Jane and I, not minding that she's getting there four hours before the stadium seats open, which is where she will be sitting today. She's quiet in the back seat, I turn my head to look at her and find her staring out the window. I know she's upset about missing a game, missing a few until she's fully cleared to play again.

But she puts a smile on her face when we walk into the locker room and out onto the pitch.

I'm stretching in the middle of the field, arms over my head, eyes scanning the area for a certain blonde when I hear someone yell my name. 

"Rach!" 

I turn just in time to miss a ball flying at my head. "Geez," I mutter, spinning around to find who the source is, seeing Sofia jog in my direction.

"What the heck was that? You were literally paying attention two seconds ago. You need to be more careful or else you'll get hurt." 

"Or maybe don't kick a ball my face when I'm not looking," I countered defensively. 

"Maybe you should be paying attention instead of drooling over your girl." 

My mouth drops open and I know my face is turning red. "She's- we're not- she's not my girl." 

Sof smirks at me. "Mhm."

"She's not," I say more forcefully. 

"Are you sure about that?" I follow her eyes to find Kristie already looking at us. When we make eye contact she gives me a small wave, a smile breaking out onto her face. 

"She's not or she's not _yet?" _

I shove her away from me, saying that we have a game to play and need to focus, she just laughs.

When we're all lined up in number order heading out onto the field, I look up into the stands like I always do when we walk out. I scan the stands and my eyes land on one section that has a white banner draped across the barrier between the field and the seats. 

**We ❤️ Mewis #19 **

I can hear Jane gasp and Allysha almost runs into my back after my steps falter. 

"Rach what the-" When she sees what I'm looking at she stops talking. 

Throughout the rest of the stadium, there are other posters and signs for her too, saying that they love her, wishing her a speedy recovery, one poster even has her face on it. 

The coaching staff was forced to announce that she would be out for a little while for an "injury", but not giving away anything more so the fans weren't concerned when she was absent for a while.

By the time we make it to our pre-game huddle, everyone has seen the stands and can feel the absence of #19.

"Okay," Kea says before starting our pre-game talk like we always do. "We're a team. But we're a family first. We stick by each other's sides when things get rough and we're there to pick each other back up. We're going to go out there and play for each other, for our fans, and for Kristie."

Our captain looks around the group at each one of us, all locked in on what she's saying. All thinking the same thing. It's obvious now how much of an impact just one person has made on the team. How even though she hasn't been here for really that long of a time, we all miss her on the field with us, she's become a part of our family, and we all protect our family.

I know she probably wants to say more, but Kea becomes choked up, having taken the recent events the hardest out of all of us. 

"Mewis on three," I say, reaching my hand towards the middle of the group. Everyone piles on, Jane's keeper glove being the first. 

"One, two, three, Mewis!" 

Everyone separates at once, running to their spot. Jane pats my back before tearing off for the goal. Kea reaches for my arm, stopping me. 

I tilt my head in confusion and she pulls me in for a hug. Her arms wrap around me tightly and I wrap mine around hers. Neither of us needs to speak. 

She lets go of me shortly and nods her head in the direction of the box where I know Justin always sits. "She's up there," before walking backwards to her position.

My eyes shoot up to the box in search of a specific someone. My heart starts to beat faster when I find her, I can see Justin's large body next to hers and I see her wave, a smile breaking onto my face before I jog to my spot.

Thirty-nine minutes in when I score against the Washington Spirit keeper, my eyes find Suite 106. I point to the back of the net when the ball is sitting and then to the box, right at her. 

"For you," I mouth. I don't know if she understood, but I can feel it in my heart that she did. 

The stands erupt into cheers and I'm tackled by my teammates. 

Each goal I score after that, I point to her again. She gets the message. Everyone does. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiiiiii (she says as she hides behind her computer)
> 
> I'm sorry this took such a long time. For a hot second I had no motivation and then was questioning whether or not I should continue this story...do you guys even like it? It's okay if you don't, please be honest.
> 
> If you do, do you like the way things are headed? Anything you dislike? 
> 
> If you don't like it, sorry to disappoint you :/
> 
> Let me know what you guys think
> 
> (also if anything doesn't make sense/is confusing/if there are any mistakes pls let me know, i tried to get this out asap for y'all so i might've missed something)
> 
> anyhoo, hope y'all are good💗
> 
> xx


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